Ramadan Advice from a C+ Muslim

I know the lofty goals to which we should aspire in Ramadan. This month is a chance to excel in worship of Allah. It is an opportunity to transform our ordinary condition. However, with several years of Ramadan under my belt, I've noticed some troubling patterns in my own practice, both in maximizing the benefits of this month, and in making its impacts last throughout the rest of the year. I'm sure you know the feeling. After about two weeks of Ramadan, you think about fasting two days a week, or even every other day, and it seems so easy. You feel fairly certain that you can manage that in the upcoming year. You make it through the six days of shawwal, sometimes delaying so long that you're dreading an early moon sighting for Dhul Qi'dah. You manage a few more days here and there. You hit Arafat and Ashoora. But gradually, those little appetites start to take over. That daily coffee, or sweet, or lunch buffet becomes more and more irrestible, and the tranquility of Ramadan fades to a distant memory. The same can be said for qiyaam ul-layl, reading the Qur'an, and the relatively high levels of faith one attains in Ramadan.

As Yasir Qadhi stated during the conference call the other night, it is impossible to maintain the iman of Ramadan throughout the year. And yet, we must try to avoid a total collapse, a return to square one. We should ask, when Ramadan approaches again, do we really welcome it with eager anticipation….or does that indulgent, undisciplined side of our nafs moan and groan? If you've experienced Ramadan before, you know that a week from now, insha'Allah, you will love fasting….but how do you feel right now?

When I first became a Muslim, I was intimidated by a few things–namely, fajr prayer and fasting. I was never a morning person, and I always loved to eat. As I embarked on my first Ramadan (which incidentally, spanned the shortest days of the year), I was really dismayed to hear, that in addition to the full day of fasting, there was also this long prayer at night that I was supposed to attend I thought, “isn't starving myself all day enough?!” Of course, as time passed, I learned to love taraweeh. So change is possible, and there is always room for improvement.

When you look at the books of spirituality in Islam, there is one common element that is always mentioned as a foundational practice–controlling the appetite. I have to admit, this really scares me. I get so much pleasure from eating food, a lot of food. When I read about controlling the appetite as a necessary step to purifying the soul, I always wish that there was some other way. But what better time than Ramadan to learn this self control? Likewise, there are du'a in which we ask Allah to make the Quran the spring of our hearts. Sometimes, we feel the meaning of that supplication. At other times, it is just poetic language. In Wisconsin, after the long, long winters, one of the most amazing moments of spring is when the light green buds start to burst from the tree branches. At that time of year, you've almost forgotten what trees look like with leaves. A desolate landscape suddenly becomes beautiful. How often have you felt the same thing when you embrace the Quran after a long absence? And what better time than Ramadan for our hearts to blossom?

So for us C+ Muslims (and that may include a little grade inflation) who often fall short of the lofty goals, what can we do to ensure that this Ramadan will be different? What are the practical steps we can take to maximize the benefits, and then carry them through the year. I have a few suggestions, and welcome your thoughts as well:

The One Plate Pledge

Do we really learn self control in Ramadan? To some extent, yes (assuming you aren't hiding in the closet with a Snickers bar). But during the day, a believer knows that he or she is not permitted to eat or drink. What happens when eating and drinking becomes halal, when the sun sets, do we exercise self control then? Unfortunately, the answer to this is often “no.” And this is tragic, because when Ramadan ends, it will be halal to eat and drink for the next eleven months! So it would seem a wise move to focus on self control at the time of iftar. That is certainly a lesson we can take with us for the rest of the year. To this end, I'm proposing the one plate pledge: at iftar, limit yourself to one plate of food. I'm not suggesting that we abandon good food. I'm not suggesting that we don't eat more later in the evening. At suhoor, eat whatever you like in preparation for the long day ahead. But at iftar, at that time when the food lust wells up inside you, when you turn into “the human tornado”, as one brother described it to me, (thanks, Fuad!), at that time…control yourself! And if you see me at the iftar, and I'm creeping back to the table for another few spoonfuls of Biryani, or make it half a plate…or maybe the kids will want some, I'll just fill it up…then say, “Musa, remember the one plate pledge.” By the way, I 'm not suggesting that you we make an oath. Just try…limit it to one plate.

Ramadan is Better

During the day in Ramadan, you might pass your favorite restaurant or cafe, and think fondly of what it will be like to once again indulge yourself freely. And insha'Allah, you will indeed return to those simple, halal enjoyments once the month has passed. But remember…Ramadan is better. Don't occupy yourself with the small pleasures that lie ahead. Rather, reflect on the treasures that will no longer be available to you.

Modest Goals

Bill Cosby spoke at my college graduation, and his advice was simple, “set goals.” In the past, I know that I've entered Ramadan with all sorts of fantastic ideas about what I might accomplish. However, I often ended up a little scattered, not really fulfilling any particular aim. This year, I'm trying to set finite, modest goals, that I can focus on accomplishing. Of course, one has to be reading the whole Quran.

Insha'Allah, with these simple steps, I hope some of us can leave Ramadan as “solid B” Muslims.

Related Posts:

• Preparing for Ramadan – New Yasir Qadhi Audio
• OPEN THREAD: Ramadan… the “Little” Deeds that Count
• Ramadan Conference Call Questions. You can download/listen to audio here
• Ramadhaan 101