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Embracing the Winter Blues

Abu Ibrahim

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When the days shorten and the nights lengthen, we know all too well that winter is upon us.  For some people, they experience what is known as “Seasonal Affective Disorder”, more commonly known as the winter blues.  With symptoms ranging from sleeping too much, to having little energy, to feeling depressed, the winter blues seems to have a tendency of affecting people in areas of limited daylight hours such as the Northern USA, Canada, and the United Kingdom.

However, if we were to examine the season of snow from an Islamic perspective, we would quickly realize there is a great blessing in the time of winter.  Al-Ḥasan al-Baṣri is reported to have said, “How good winter is for the believer! Its night is long, so he prays in it; and its day is short, so he observes fasting in it.”

Indeed, some of our pious predecessors would look forward to winter for the purpose of the night prayer.  If you think about it, the last one-third of the night, the extra blessed time to perform the tahajjud prayer, is longer during the winter time.  Our pious predecessors would look forward to having these long nights to pray tahajjud and would cherish having a longer time to spend in their alāh and du‘ā’.

How does one make tahajjud?  I have to admit, I am not regular with my tahajjud.  In reality, my consistency is rather deplorable.  However, let me share with you one ‘trick’ I’ve started using this year.  I started drinking a lot of water before I go to sleep in the evenings.  Why?  Well, you see, my bladder is strong, alamdulillāh, and so when I need to use the bathroom, my bladder will wake me up in the middle of the night forcing me out of my comfortable bed.  So, if you make it to the bathroom, why not just make wuū’ and then pray two raka‘āt of tahajjud then?

Moreover, the time for fajr comes in later during the winter time.  So if you were to wake up in the winter time when you would normally wake up for fajr in the summer (say 5 am), then you would have some prime tahajjud time!  Consistency is the key, so make du‘ā’ that I too am able to achieve some consistency when it comes to the night prayer, inshā’Allāh.

Furthermore, the short days allow us to be able to keep extra nawāfil fasts without difficulty.  Indeed, when our day ends around 5 pm, we often times don’t even notice the thirst from our fasting!  So why not take it upon ourselves to do some extra fasting during these blessed days so we can reap in some of blessings of the winter time!  Why not start fasting the three white days of the lunar month every month?  Indeed, the fasts are easy yet virtuous and rewarding,inshā’Allāh!

Additionally, one can look forward to making wuū’ with the cold water of winter.  Why you would ask?  Well, it’s a great time to reflect upon the blessings of warm water and furthermore we can hope to reap in the extra reward of having to go through the ‘hardships’ of making wuū’ with the cold water.  Indeed, if something is difficult for us and we do it solely for Allāh, our reward is with Him, inshā’Allāh!  Furthermore, our delicate care in using cold water for making wuū’ keeps us closer to the Sunnah of not being extravagant in making wuū’ and wasting excess water!

In conclusion, there are many beautiful bounties that come with the beginning of the winter season.  Only a few simple blessings have been listed above, but, de facto, many more do exist.  For example, many of the women in the winter time are forced to cover their bodies as compared to the summer time when they are wearing clothes yet many of them are still naked.  Hence, winter times makes it easier for the Muslim man to lower his gaze too, inshā’Allāh.

So, as winter time approaches, let us embrace the cold and benefit ourselves from this beautiful season, inshā’Allāh!

15 Comments

15 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Yasmin

    January 19, 2012 at 12:06 PM

    Jazakallah khair for this very important and timely post. I had never thought about winter this way!

    • Avatar

      anon

      January 19, 2012 at 1:01 PM

      Yes, me too. Very beneficial article, mashallah.

    • Abu Ibrahim

      Abu Ibrahim

      January 19, 2012 at 5:59 PM

      JazakAllahkhair for your guys kind words, alhamdulillah

  2. Avatar

    Umm Sulaim

    January 19, 2012 at 1:35 PM

    I find if I wake up still very sleepy, I stumble to the bathroom with my vision blurred and stumble out, thankful I did not fall into the bowl!!! Haha!

    Sometimes my vision is so blurred I have to crawl for fear of losing consciousness; not a good time for standing, let alone praying.

    For those of us not used to the cold, harmattan (cold, dry and dusty season) makes us reluctant to get up, even when fully awake.

    I prefer the cold to the heat though.

    Umm Sulaim

  3. Avatar

    Zamzam

    January 19, 2012 at 1:53 PM

    Every moment of life is an opportunity to worship Allah.
    The hotness of summer is a time to remember hellfire and ask Allah to protect us from it, and guide us to be obedient to Him.
    The coldness of winter is a time to reflect on this aya, Allah says interpretation of meaning, (They will be reclining therein on raised couches. They will find there neither (heat of) the sun nor bitter cold.) [76:13]
    The falling leaves of the fall is a view that reminds us that our life is short, so that we should do our best to spend it doing what pleases Allah.
    The beautiful flowers of the spring reminds us that as the gloomy days and nights of the fall come to an end, the afflictions of this life will come to an end and we will enjoy their fruits in Paradise if we endured them patiently for the sake of Allah.
    The point is that we should do our best to be obedient slaves to Allah all times after depending on Him and seeking His help.

  4. Avatar

    June

    January 19, 2012 at 2:45 PM

    Jazaka allah kheir! This is a great reminder! I’ve never let winter get me down too much but I still have at times succumbed to a bit of depression of over-sleepiness. This article has really helped me to perk up and see even more blessings and joy in this season, masha Allah!

  5. Hena Zuberi

    Hena Zuberi

    January 19, 2012 at 3:04 PM

    Perfect reminder- your posts are a welcome dose of inspiration on MM.
    JazakAllah khayr Brother. We take so much for granted, the seasons the nights and days, because we forget our purpose. Keep us in your duas.

    • Abu Ibrahim

      Abu Ibrahim

      January 19, 2012 at 5:57 PM

      JazakAllahkhair Sister Hena, I’m quite excited to be a new member of the MM team and I thank you guys for your warm welcome!

  6. Avatar

    Leo Imanov

    January 19, 2012 at 3:37 PM

    in winter alhamdu li-lLah, i gain the strength for the shaum in summer time which will be extra long this year, i thank Allah for the chance to pray tahajud late in the “morning” just before fajr pray to be carried out. and direct go to work no need to sleep again the opposite to summer time. wake up.. sleep again and wake up to work.

  7. Avatar

    ummMaryam

    January 19, 2012 at 10:55 PM

    salamu ‘alaikum,

    jazakallah khair. yes, i have always liked how the winter forces sisters wearing tight clothes to cover up :) the coats are a barakah in the layers they add to hide the shapes they should have the haya to hide all year long.

    may Allah help the sisters of this ummah to wear proper hijab ameen.

  8. Avatar

    Olivia

    January 23, 2012 at 6:20 PM

    i’m blue because i dont get any winter in california! why do so many people hate on winter? it’s one of my favorite times of year.

    • Avatar

      anon

      January 23, 2012 at 7:53 PM

      I live in the UK where it is winter half the year, and that’s why I hate it. :( I can definitely feel the effects of seasonal affective disorder.

    • Avatar

      Abumariam

      January 24, 2012 at 3:59 AM

      You should move to Norway here we have long dark winter days and nights, maybe you’ll see why people dislike winter :-)

      • Avatar

        anon

        January 24, 2012 at 2:09 PM

        In the uk we have daylight savings all winter, and so what little daytime there is, is dreary. But thankfully the clocks go back in March, so Alhamdulillah, everything is as Allah wills.

  9. Avatar

    depressed.

    December 10, 2013 at 9:21 AM

    i wish you’d give a bit more time/space in your article to the blues. sometimes they are so bad you cannot even read a sentence about tahajjud wihtout feeling like you hate yourself, let alone have the energy to pray it….
    i think more attention has to be given to the reality of depression … take us to healing slowly, don’t just jump up with a medicine that we are actually unable to even reach at this time..
    maybe you could start by presscribing something easier – like dua – take us there step by step. it’s more honoring of where we are at and our sad reality.

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#Islam

This Article Could be Zakat-Eligible

Who Accounts For This Pillar of Islam

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Co-written by Shaykh Osman Umarji

As writers on MuslimMatters, it came as a surprise when the website we write on marked itself zakat-eligible on its fundraiser for operations in Ramadan. This website has previously highlighted the misuse and abuse of zakat for vague and dodgy reasons, including instances of outright fraud by nonprofit corporations.  We have lamented the seemingly inexorable march from zakat being for living human beings in need to financial play-doh for nonprofit corporate boards.

Estimated global zakat is somewhere between $200 billion to $1 trillion.  Eliminating global poverty is estimated at $187 billion– not just for Muslims, but everyone.  There continue to be strong interests in favor of more putty-like zakat to benefit the interests of the organizations that are not focused on reducing poverty. Thus, in many ways, a sizeable chunk of zakat benefits the affluent rather than the needy. Zakat, rather than being a credit to the Muslim community, starts to look more like an indictment of it.

No, it’s not ikhtilaf

The recent article on this website, Dr. Usama Al-Azmi seemed somewhat oblivious to the cavalier way the nonprofit corporate sector in the United States treats Zakat.  The article did not do justice to legitimate concerns about zakat distribution by dismissing the issue as one of “ikhtilaf,” or a reasonable difference of opinion, as it ignored the broader concern about forces working hard to make zakat a “wild west” act of worship where just about anything goes.  

It’s essential to identify the crux of the problem. Zakat has eight categories of permissible beneficiaries in the Quran. 1 Two are various levels of poor, distribution overhead; then there are those whose hearts are to be inclined,  free captives, relieve indebtedness, the wayfarer, and the cause of Allah (fisabilillah). The category of fisabilillah, historically,  the majority of scholars have interpreted as the cost of jihad (like actual fighting). However, in recent times, Muslim nonprofit corporations, with support of learned Muslim leaders, have adopted an increasingly aggressive and vague posture that allows nearly any beneficial cause to get zakat.   

The concerns about the abuse of zakat, and the self-serving desire by corporations to turn fisabilillah into a wastebasket Zakat category that could be “incredibly broad” has to do with far more than a difference of opinion (ikhtilaf ) about the eligibility of Dawah organizations. Let’s assume dawah and educational organizations are eligible to administer Zakat funds.  We need to know what that means in practice. What we have is a fundamental question the fisabilillah-can-mean-virtually-anything faction never manages to answer: are there any limits to zakat usage at all?

Show Your Work

We fully understand that in our religious practice, there is a set of rules.  In Islamic Inheritance for example, for example, we cannot cavalierly change the definition of what a “daughter” is to mean any girl you want to treat like a daughter. There is an established set of rules relating to acts of worship. For the third pillar of Islam, zakat, there seem to be no limits to the absurd-sounding questions we can ask that now seem plausible.  

Unfortunately, we have too many folks who invoke “ikhtilaf” to justify adopting almost any opinion and not enough people who are willing to explain their positions. We need a better understanding of zakat and draw the lines on when nonprofit corporations are going too far.

You can be conservative and stand for zakat as an act of worship that contributes to social justice. You can have a more expansive interpretation friendly to the nonprofit corporate sector’s needs to include the revenue source. Wherever you stand, if you don’t provide evidence and develop detailed uniform and accepted principles and rules that protect those people zakat was meant to help, you are inviting abuse and at the very least, opening the door towards inequitable results. 2

Can you feed the needy lentils and rice for $100 a meal, with margins of $99 a meal going to pay salaries to provide these meals and fundraise for them?  Why or why not?

Can a Dawah organization purchase an $80 million jet for its CEO, who can use it to travel the world to do “dawah,” including places like Davos or various ski resorts?  What rules exist that would prevent something like this? As far as we know, nothing at all.

Bubble Charity

In the United States, demographic sorting is a common issue that affects all charitable giving, not just giving by Muslims. The most affluent live in neighborhoods with other people who are generally as prosperous as they are. Certain places seem almost perversely designed to allow wealthy residents to be oblivious to the challenges of the poor.  There are undeniable reasons why what counts as “charity” for the wealthy means giving money to the Opera, the Met Gala, and Stanford University.

The only real way affluent Muslims know they supposed to care about poor people is that maybe they have a Shaikh giving khutbas talking about the need to do so and their obligation of zakat once a year or so. That is now becoming a thing of the past. Now it is just care about fisabilillah- it means whatever your tender heart wants it to mean.   

As zakat becomes less about the poor, appeals will be for other projects with a higher amount of visibility to the affluent.  Nonprofits now collect Zakat for galas with celebrities. Not fundraising at the gala dinner mind you, but merely serving dinner and entertaining rich people. Educational institutions and Masajid that have dawah activities (besides, everything a Masjid does is fisabilillah) can be quite expensive. Getting talent to run and teach in these institutions is also costly. Since many of the people running these institutions are public figures and charismatic speakers with easy access and credibility with the affluent. It is far easier for them to get Zakat funds for their projects.

People who benefit from these projects because they send their children to these institutions or attend lectures themselves will naturally feel an affinity for these institutions that they won’t have with the poor. Zakat will stay in their bubble.  Fisabilillah.

Dawa is the new Jihad

Jihad, as in war carried out by a Khalifah and paid for with zakat funds, is an expensive enterprise. But no society is in a permanent state of warfare, so they can work towards eliminating poverty during peacetime. Muslim communities have done this in the past.  Dawah is qualitatively different from jihad as it is permanent. There was never a period in Islamic history when there was no need to do dawah. Many times in history, nobody was fighting jihad. There was no period of Islamic history when there were there was never a need for money to educate people. Of course, earlier Muslims used zakat in education in limited, defined circumstances. It is not clear why limitations no longer apply.  

Indeed dawah is a broad category.  For example, many people regard the Turkish costume drama “Diriliş: Ertuğrul” as dawah.  Fans of the show can’t stop talking about the positive effects it has had on their lives and their iman. What prevents zakat from funding future expensive television costume dramas? Nothing, as far as we can see.   

No Standards or Accountability

Unfortunately, in the United States, there are no uniform, specific standards governing zakat. Anything goes now when previously in Islamic history, there were appropriate standards. Nonprofit corporations themselves decide if they are zakat-eligible or not. In some instances, they provide objectively comical explanations, which supporters within the corporation’s bubble pretty much always swallow whole. Corporations don’t have to segregate Zakat-eligible funds from general funds. When they do, they can make up their own rules for how and when they spend zakat. No rules make zakat indistinguishable from any other funding source since they can change their standards year after year depending on their funding needs (if they have rules at all) and nobody would be the wiser. It is exceedingly rare for these corporations to issue detailed reports on how they use zakat.  

The Shift to Meaninglessness

Organizations with platforms (like the one that runs this website) are going to be eager to get on the zakat gravy train. There is no cost to slapping a “zakat-eligible” label on yourself, either financial or social. It seems like everyone does it now. Some Zakat collectors are conscientious and care about helping the poor, though they are starting to look a little old-fashioned. For them, it may make sense to certify Zakat administrators like halal butchers.

Zakat used to be about helping discrete categories of human beings that can benefit from it.  It can now mean anything you want it to mean. In the end, though, without real standards, it may mean nothing at all.

Footnotes:

  1. The sunnah also highlights the essence of zakah as tending to the needs of the poor. For example, the Prophet ṣallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam (peace and blessings of Allāh be upon him) commanded Muadh bin Jabal, when sending him to Yemen, to teach the people that Allah has obligated charity upon them to be taken from their rich and given to their poor (Sahih Muslim).
  2. In Islamic legal theory (usool al-fiqh), sadd al-dhariya is a principle that refers to blocking the means to evil before it can materialize. It is invoked when a seemingly permissible action may lead to unethical behavior. This principle is often employed in financial matters.

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Do You Know These Heroes of Eid?

Ramadan is a time of sacrifice, and the Eid honors and celebrates the fulfillment of that sacrifice. But for many the hardships do not end.

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Rohingya children

Ramadan is a time of sacrifice, and the Eid honors and celebrates the fulfillment of that sacrifice. But for many the hardships do not end.

Between one million and three million Muslims are being detained in concentration camps in China, while masjids are being demolished and imams executed.

The Rohingya Muslims of Burma continue to suffer from terrible persecution. In one Rohingya refugee camp on the Burma / Bangladesh border there are half a million children. These children are banned by the Burmese authorities from attending school and are at risk of early marriage, child labor or being trafficked.

In the Central African Republic, the Muslim minority lives in daily fear of being killed, especially in the south.

The Palestinians continue to suffer after seventy years of occupation, with no end in sight.

Russian and Assad regime attacks on civilians continue in Syria, with the real possibility of an upcoming genocide in Idlib province.

Heroes Abound

In the midst of this all suffering, heroes abound. There’s Serikzhan Bilash of Kazakhstan, who has labored feverishly to document China’s internment of Muslims across the border. He urges those in his organization to continue their work, even as he himself has been arrested.

Those Rohingya children I mentioned in the refugee camp, banned from attending school? One 14-year-old Rohingya girl mentioned in the article has managed to enroll in school in Bangladesh. Her mother sold her food rations and borrowed money to create a fake Bangladeshi birth certificate, then paid a smuggler to take her daughter out of the camp. The girl herself says, “People hate the Rohingya here. I don’t tell people I am one… I have to lie about my identity to survive. Even though it’s a big struggle… I am able to study. There are hundreds of thousands of kids like me inside of the camps who are forced to marry off early…They have no opportunities.”

Also in that camp is 13-year-old Halim, who runs his own tutoring service, where he teaches more than 20 children. He says, “I am teaching them so they can do something for our nation. If they don’t learn anything, they can’t prosper in their life, as well as they can’t fight for the nation.”

Razan al-Najjar

Razan al-Najjar

In Palestine, let us not forget Razan al-Najjar, a 21-year-old volunteer paramedic from Gaza who was shot by an Israeli sniper on June 1, 2018, while tending to a tear gas victim. In her last Facebook post, the day before she was killed, she wrote, “Your conscience will be comforted as much as possible since God always knows your intention. #sleep_well Be good.”

In Syria, we have Dr. Omar Ibrahim, an Egyptian neurosurgeon who could probably be earning a hefty salary anywhere in the world, but instead labors under constant bombardment in the war-torn and half crushed city of Idlib. He’s been in Syria for five years and says, “I have no regrets about doing this work. Because I have passion for my work, and this work inspires me.”

A Religion of Heroes

Dr. Omar Ibrahim

Dr. Omar Ibrahim

Such stories are amazing, but they are not unique. There are countless heroes, and should that surprise us? Islam is a religion of heroes, and has always been so, going all the way back to its inception in Makkah, when the Prophet Muhammad (sws) drew around himself the weak and powerless, the slaves and foreigners. They were tortured, but did not surrender their new faith. Heroes.

Or, several years later, when the disbelievers of Arabia came in great numbers to wipe the Muslims off the face of the earth. The Muslims dug a great trench around Madinah, and held off the attackers under conditions of hunger and terrible cold, until – with Allah’s help – the siege was broken. Heroes.

So if you thought such heroes were a thing of the past, remember Serikzhan Bilash, the Rohingya girl, Halim, Razan al-Najjar, Dr. Omar Ibrahim and the untold, uncounted heroes like them. You may even know a few heroes personally. I do.

There’s my friend Karim, who works for an organization that sponsors Muslim orphans. He’s overworked and underpaid, and struggles to support his family and two children. He’s highly experienced and could earn more somewhere else. But he sticks with it because he believes in Islamic work.

I think also of my daughter’s homeroom teacher, sister Sharmeen. She’s an enthusiastic teacher who pushes the children to read, write and understand the roots of language. She does more than is required and is not appreciated as she should be. But once again, her passion drives her.

Persistence of Dua’

Our local Imam recently gave a khutbah about the importance of dua’. He said that Allah loves the dua’ that is persistent. Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said in al-Daa’ wa’l-Dawa’: “One of the most beneficial of remedies is persisting in dua’.”

So be persistent. Pray for our suffering Ummah, and pray for our heroes. And donate whatever you can spare to the organizations that work on their behalf.

My Ordinary Life

As for me, my life is ordinary. On the morning of Eid, I, my mother and my daughter Salma – who is twelve years old now – wake up early and put on our best clothes, inshaAllah. We get in the car and stop at Krispy Kreme donuts.  I buy a box of a dozen to share with others after Salat al-Eid, and a few extras in a bag for our family, so we don’t have to wait in a long line and elbow people to snatch a cruller.

I pick up my cousin’s son, who does not have a car. We go downtown to the Fresno convention center and sit among a thousand other Muslims. We recite the Takbeerat al-Eid, praising Allah’s greatness. The Eid salat begins, then I strain to hear the khutbah as so many people begin chattering right away. Especially, the sisters. Sorry ladies, but it’s true :-)

I know, it all sounds a bit silly, but I’m excited. It’s a wonderful day. I see brothers that I haven’t seen since last year. Everyone is wearing their best outfits.

But it’s not about the donuts or the nice clothes. It is this feeling of sharing a connection with every Muslim around the world; a feeling of being part of something great.

When we return home, my mother makes cookies, and we put some decorations on the walls. Salma opens her presents, which this year are a new Switch game, a dartboard and a pearl necklace. It’s the first piece of real jewelry I’ve ever bought her. Buying it left me with $18 in my bank account, which means I predict a lot of Uber driving (my side job) in my near future. So I hope she likes it.

On such days, I thank Allah that I am alive to see another sunrise. Another day to strive to be a better Muslim and a better human being.

The Spirit of the Prophets

I also talk to Salma, as I do every year, about our Muslim brothers and sisters who are struggling all over the world, fighting for their freedom and their very survival. They don’t have pizza and donuts on Eid or pearl necklaces. Some are starving. Most have lost someone: a parent, a child, a sibling or a friend. Some have been utterly devastated.

Yet they are resolute. They have a deep strength that, like the well of Zamzam, never runs dry, SubhanAllah. They will not give up their hopes, their dreams or their faith, Allah willing.

These are the real heroes of Eid. I feel small next to them. They are the ones living the spirit of the Prophets and the Sahabah. They have made the greatest sacrifices, and are still striving, undaunted. They are living the words of Allah:

Say: ‘Verily, my ṣalāh, my sacrifice, my living, and my dying are all for Allāh, the Lord of the ‘Alameen’ (6:162).

May Allah ease the hearts of all who are suffering, replace pain with comfort and joy, sickness with health, oppression with liberation, and tyranny with freedom. May Allah give them security, safety, comfort, victory, and Jannah.

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Swallowing Your Pride For A Moment Is Harder Than Praying All Night | Imam Omar Suleiman

Imam Omar Suleiman

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Iblees was no ordinary worshipper. He worshipped Allah for thousands of years with thousands of prayers. He ascended the ranks until he accompanied the angels with his noteworthy worship. Performing good deeds was no issue for him. He thanked Allah with his prayers, and Allah rewarded him with a lofty station in Paradise. But when Adam was created and given the station that he was, suddenly Iblees was overcome by pride. He couldn’t bear to see this new creation occupy the place that he did. And as he was commanded to prostrate to him, his pride would overcome him and doom him for eternity. Alas, swallowing his pride for one prostration of respect to Adam was more difficult to him than thousands of prostrations of worship to Allah.

In that is a cautionary lesson for us especially in moments of intense worship. When we exert ourselves in worship, we eventually start to enjoy it and seek peace in it. But sometimes we become deluded by that worship. We may define our religiosity exclusively in accordance with it, become self-righteous as a result of it, and abuse people we deem lesser in the name of it. The worst case scenario of this is what the Prophet (peace be upon him) said about one who comes on the day of judgment with all of their prayers, fasting, and charity only to have it all taken away because of an abusive tongue.

But what makes Iblees’s struggle so relevant to ours? The point of worship is to humble you to your Creator and set your affairs right with His creation in accordance with that humility. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said that whoever has an atom’s worth of pride in their heart would not enter paradise. The most obvious manifestation of that pride is rejecting the truth and belittling someone else. But other subtle manifestations of that pride include the refusal to leave off argumentation, abandon grudges, and humble yourself to the creation in pursuit of the pleasure of the Creator.

Yaqeen

Hence a person would rather spend several Ramadan’s observing the last 10 nights in intense prayer seeking forgiveness for their sins from Allah, rather then humble themselves for a moment to one of Allah’s servants by seeking forgiveness for their transgressions against him, even if they too have a claim.

Jumah is our weekly Eid, and Monday’s and Thursday’s are our weekly semblances of Ramadan as the Prophet (s) used to fast them since our deeds are presented to Allah on those days. He said about them, “The doors of Heaven are opened every Monday and Thursday, and Allah pardons in these days every individual servant who is not a polytheist, except those who have enmity between them; Allah Says: ‘Delay them until they reconcile with each other”

In Ramadan, the doors of Heaven are opened throughout the month and the deeds ascend to Allah. But imagine if every day as your fasting, Quran recitation, etc. is presented to Allah this month, He responds to the angels to delay your pardon until you reconcile with your brother. Ramadan is the best opportunity to write that email or text message to that lost family member or friend and say “it’s not worth it to lose Allah’s forgiveness over this” and “IM SORRY.”

Compare these two statements:

The Prophet ṣallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam (peace and blessings of Allāh be upon him) said: “He who boycotts his brother for more than three days and dies during this period will be from the people of hellfire.”

He also said:

“I guarantee a house in the suburbs of Paradise for one who leaves arguments even if he is right.”

Swallowing your pride is bitter, while prayer is sweet. Your ego is more precious to you than your sleep. But above all, Allah’s pleasure is more precious than it all.

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