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Farmocracy Experiment Part-3 (the Gaza Massacre)

The treacherous leaders of the cats never intended to fulfill their side of the cease-fire. Exit routes continued to be blockaded by haughty cats, who would find all sorts of excuses to eat the parrots that were leaving or to stop food supplies coming in. These cats wanted to continue punishing the parrots of Sama for voting Sama leaders in.

Published

Farmocracy Experiment 1 | 2 | 3

Please read Farmocracy Experiment-1 and 2 for background to better understand this satirical allegory.

The cats of Tsin (Israel), fully supported by the bulls of Acir (America), did what was anticipated by most. They decided to collectively punish the corner of the cage which was more favorable to Sama (Hamas) for voting in who they did not like in a failed famocracy (democracy) experiment (failed not because it wasn’t democratic, but failed because the “wrong” people got elected, as decided by Israel and its protector). [Part-2]

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As the crises worsened, food supplies dwindled for the parrots that lived in the Sama side of the cage. Desperation set in, and violence started erupting between the two, but due to the disproportionate sizes of the animals, the ratio of casualties continued to be several parrots to one cat. Eventually, a neighboring colony of parrots (the people of Tpyge) whose leaders had already sold their souls to the West and Israel, but still felt for their “kind” decided to help broker a “ceasefire”. The rules of disengagement were as follows:

  1. The cats would stop surrounding all exit routes for the parrots so that they could find food for themselves without being eaten.
  2. 2. The cats would stop their incursions into the Sama side of the cage, as they had been putting their heads in and swallowing quite a few of the parrots.
  3. 3. The Sama parrots would stop shooting seed-shells at the cats, as a few of those shells had actually killed 16 cats in the last 3 yrs.

The treacherous leaders of the cats never intended to fulfill their side of the cease-fire. Exit routes continued to be blockaded by haughty cats, who would find all sorts of excuses to eat the parrots that were leaving or to stop food supplies coming in. These cats wanted to continue punishing the parrots of Sama for voting Sama leaders in. The cats would have preferred this side of the cage to be controlled by leaders as compliant as the corrupt Hata. Ultimately, they wanted Sama destroyed so they can have a subservient leadership in the Tsin cage.

So, a few months later, some cats on official order from the leaders of Tsin entered the cage andswallowed six whole parrots in one swoop. The cats claimed that these parrots were planning to hurt them. After this incursion, the so-called “cease-fire” started crumbling. Desperate parrots, with little in terms of food or supplies (as stated by some neutral swan observers) could only resort to throwing more seeds. Yes, the Sama parrots knew that they were going against the cease-fire, and against their own religious code of conduct, because the seeds would invariably kill some innocent cats, but try talking morality to hungry, desperate and increasingly hopeless birds! The parrots could see that Tsin cats weren’t holding its side of the agreement, so it resorted to the only retribution that it had available to itself.

The situation kept worsening until the cats decided that the opportunity was ripe for forcibly removing Sama from power in this side of the cage, especially because the bulls of Acir were still busy with a transition in their leadership, with the new leader of the bulls possibly being a bit fairer (though the animal community didn’t expect much). So, while many animals were hibernating in the winter, the cats started throwing huge fire-bombs into the cage, claiming they were targeting only the Sama leaders. The parrots couldn’t understand how anyone would believe the cats’ story, especially since they were were so huddled so tightly in a cage that otherwise couldn’t hold quarter of their population. The parrots couldn’t understand how the animal kingdom, even the Acir bulls, would believe that there could be a precise removal of Sama militants, as everyone was mixed together. But amazingly, the bulls bought the cat side of the story, every bit of it!

Soon, almost 500 parrots were dead, the vast majority being innocent parrots who had nothing to do with the seed-shell shooting. The male parrots were not counted as innocent, simply because they were male. A swan doctor claimed that he had only seen one or two actual parrots who may have had the prowess to launch seeds among the dead, the rest were innocent victims, almost 50% female or children. In addition, the parrots’ meager infrastructure in the cage was destroyed, including their main educational center.

But the cats were not done. Emboldened by the Acir bulls’ leader who declared that it was the seed-shells that were entirely responsible for everything, the cats planned to enter the cages and have some fresh direct flesh. As they entered, they prevented all reporters from the animal kingdom from reporting back to their nations about the situation. They also stopped medical and food supplies, and even not allowing anyone to reach baby parrots be next to their dead mothers.

The parrots weren’t quite sure when the cats would leave their cages. First it was basic necessities that were stripped; now their lives were being taken. The animal kingdom seemed helpless in the face of the bulls. Other parrot cages and colonies were more worried about their own luxuries than to worry about their fellow-parrots.

A few days after the cats’ entrance into the cage, the senators of the Acir bulls got a request from some of the evil ones from the cats that lived with them, cats who had used legal means to become the real bully over the bulls, that the senators pass a resolution praising their massacre of the parrots.  The senators, scared out of their hides that the cats might use their claws to get back at them if they didn’t comply, dutifully passed the resolution condemning the parrots for inciting the massacre!  Even the competing bulls among the senators tried to outdo each other in their subservience to the cats, declaring:

Noting that Tsin cats were bent on halting Sama seed-shells onto them, the lefty Bull leader said: “I ask any of my colleagues to imagine that happening here in our colony. Seed-shells coming from neighboring colonies. How we react?”

Co-sponsor and opposing party righty bull-leader said before the vote: “The Tsins … are responding exactly the same way we would.”

Of course, they failed to ask the right questions. How would the neighboring colonies react if the bulls of Acir were literally starving them, and squeezing every bit of hope out of their lives? Would they be held responsible if they ended up shooting a few dung-balls at Acir, would anyone blame them?

And that concludes this chapter of the still not-concluded bloodiest chapter in the cats history. The same cats who were themselves victims of mass-murder not that long ago at the hands of Epor dogs.

Alas!

Obviously the cats had forgotten how it feels to be living in a concentration camp.

Photo courtesy Reuters

 

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Abu Reem is one of the founders of MuslimMatters, Inc. His identity is shaped by his religion (Islam), place of birth (Pakistan), and nationality (American). By education, he is a ChemE, topped off with an MBA from Wharton. He has been involved with Texas Dawah, Clear Lake Islamic Center and MSA. His interests include politics, cricket, and media interactions. Career-wise, Abu Reem is in management in the oil & gas industry (but one who still appreciates the "green revolution").

11 Comments

11 Comments

  1. Pingback: Farmocracy Experiment Part-2 (The Gaza Crises) | MuslimMatters.org

  2. Sara

    January 8, 2009 at 7:11 PM

    Being a citizen of this country means paying taxes. And paying taxes means funding the slaughter of our brothers and sisters. I am not sure any sadaqah can fix that. Hijrah?

  3. Algebra

    January 8, 2009 at 7:28 PM

    WELL you KNOW THE SAYING ABOUT CATS………………………………
    My friend told me this ………………. THE CATS will always COME TO YOU PURRRRRRRRRRRRRING WHEN THEY NEED SOMETHING>…………
    As soon as you give them what they NEED they
    RUN AWAY……………………………..
    Loyalty is not their strong SUIT.
    NOW I DONT” MEAN THE LIONESSES>…………
    Just the LITTLE CATS……….

  4. mulsimah

    January 8, 2009 at 7:37 PM

    salaam

    we talk about taxes which is a law, first muslims need to start boycotting which we dont do. if you go to facebook you will see many muslims fan of starbucks (already so expensive) and other things.. and now eveyrone is talking about bcs championship.. im not that into it after whats happening.. but what Im saying many muslims are not doing the basics to even help. so lets spread the word.. we are too selfish and into our lives unfortunately . I got a quote on email how we may be introuble in the day of judgement when we are asked what we did to help our brothers and sisters. its not an option its a respoinsiblity for every muslim. so that quote really hit hard. .so spread the word using quotes like that inshAllah.

  5. iMuslim

    January 8, 2009 at 8:39 PM

    The cats would stop surrounding all exit routes for the parrots so that they could find food for themselves without being eaten.

    This immediately reminded me of the hadith about the woman who was cursed, because she locked her cat up, refused to feed it, and also prevented it from finding its own food.

    The Hell Fire for a woman who denied a lowly cat the right to eat, drink, and live…

    What, then, for those who deny human beings such rights?

  6. Amad

    January 8, 2009 at 9:05 PM

    iMuslim, what an awesome thought. I wasn’t thinking about that when I wrote it… that’s a deep point about a shallow statement, mashallah!

  7. Hassan

    January 8, 2009 at 11:09 PM

    Must watch video of Shaheed Dr. Nazar Riyyan:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SL-WHP9auYA

    I really encourage our scholars to hear his plea to them half way through the video.

  8. umtalhah

    January 9, 2009 at 5:48 PM

    as salam alaikum,
    an awesome piece of writing. i am impressed. ma sha Allah keep up the good work.

  9. Pingback: Pat Buchanan: Israel is Staging Blitzkrieg on its Gaza Concentration camp | MuslimMatters.org

  10. Miako

    January 12, 2009 at 4:05 PM

    Thank you. from the bottom of my heart. this provides a smile, and a well-needed one!

    Although I must say that it was probably not just evil kitties in the bull’s realm, but also certain hounds who had decided to stop trying to eat kitties –instead to form an alliance for the purpose of eating parrots in the hope that the Great Hound would save them from … having to live.

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