Inspiration and Spirituality

How do YOU want to be treated?

Published

August 14, 2007

How do YOU want to be treated? by Br. Aarij

We all want to be acknowledged. And we all covet respect. And we all desire some sort of love from people. So, how can we get all of this?

“Whoever wishes to be delivered from the fire (of Hell) and enter the garden (of Paradise) should die with faith in Allah and the Last Day and should treat the people as he wishes to be treated by them.”
[Muhammad – Messenger of Allah (SAWS) as recorded in Sahih Muslim]

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So here’s the deal:

1. Make a list of people you deal with:

* Parents
* Friends
* Co-workers

2. Write how you would want to be treated in each of those roles:

* I’d like to be respected and obeyed as a parent, and shown unconditional love by my kids
* I’d like to be held in honor amongst my friends, I’d like them to listen to me, to respect me, to complement me on my good, to ignore my shortcomings and to give me sincere advice
* I’d like to be heard, I’d like to be listened to and I’d like to be respected for my work

Viola! There is your to-do list from now onwards on how to deal with people! The recipe is simple: put yourself in the other’s shoes, and then ask: how would I want to be treated if I was that person? Then, treat them that way and in sha Allah, this is how you’ll be treated by them in response!

This is the way one can PERFECT one’s adaab. Whoever does this, and has complete Iman in Allah (in statements and actions), then without a doubt jannah will be his or her abode, in sha Allah.

I pray that Allah gives us all the tawfeeq to have complete Iman in Allah and to perfect our adaab by following the advise of the Prophet (SAWS) as stated in the afore-mentioned hadith, ameen.

—

Courtesy: trueword.wordpress.com

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3 Comments

abu ameerah

August 15, 2007 at 1:56 AM

interesting approach…

i think the hardest part, though, would be putting ourselves in the “other’s shoes”…

Reply
MR

August 15, 2007 at 9:26 AM

great post! mashaAllah!

this is going to be hard

Reply
aarij

August 15, 2007 at 11:18 AM

The hardest thing for me is to treat my friends the way I’d like them to treat me, especially when they make fun of me. I get soooo tempted to say something back, subhan Allah, its an uphill battle. The reason why I get so tempted is because I have a very sharp tongue, and I can come up with a pretty good comeback but I know it’ll hurt the person.

One of the things I’m using to control my tongue is ayah 19 from Surah Ahzab:

“…but when the fear departs, they will smite you with sharp tongues, miserly towards (spending anything in any) good (and only covetous of booty and wealth)”

When I read this, I was like subhan Allah, Allah is characterizing the munafiqeen with the very characteristic that I have: a sharp tongue that smites people. I’m not making tafseer of the ayah, but what I learned from that ayah is that a sharp tongue that is used to hurt people ain’t cool, its actually a characteristic of the munafiqeen!!

Another thing I have a problem with is criticism…especially in daw’ah ideas. I used to take criticism of my ideas very personally. But alhamdulillah, now every time I come up with a daw’ah idea and present it, I remind myself that the person is going to criticize the idea, not me. This is also helping a lot, alhamdulillah.

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