Cultivating Mental Well-Being In The Muslim Community [Part 2]: Back To Basics – Be Kind And Gentle To The Struggling

Authors: Taimur Kouser, MA, and Rania Awaad, MD

Mental Health Awareness Month (May) is an important time for us to define and bring awareness to mental health challenges and the multiple ways that we can address them. For Muslim communities in particular, this month offers us yet another opportunity to discuss how to combat mental health stigma, improve access to mental health care, develop more culturally and religiously informed resources and treatments, and nurture future leaders in the field.

In fact, it seems that most conversations about “mental health awareness” revolve around these kinds of topics. Healthcare organizations, researchers, community leaders, and others rightfully take this time to call for increasing access to mental health care, training culturally competent providers, raising awareness of the prevalence of mental health issues, finding ways to combat mental health stigma, and other related topics.

To be sure, these are critical issues that need to be discussed and addressed. It is encouraging to see the progress that is being made in our communities and society more broadly to try and achieve health equity and to make sure that everyone who needs quality help can access it. Moreover, it is important that we realize that there are mental health professionals and resources available for those who need help—their role in improving mental health and well-being is vital.

However, perhaps not everyone who hears about these efforts can relate to them, nor does everyone feel equipped to make progress on these goals alone. For example, some people may not be experiencing mental health challenges, so they feel that they don’t need help finding care and aren’t impacted by the presence or absence of resources. Many others may feel like they want to help bring awareness to mental health challenges in their community, but they aren’t formally researchers or teachers, so they feel limited in the scope of what they can do.

PC: Emily Underworld (unsplash)

Relatedly, it can sometimes be hard to see the concrete impact of raising awareness or increasing access to care. People may support mental health awareness events and efforts, but still struggle to see how those efforts actually make a real difference in the kinds of concerns that so many of us have—loneliness, a lack of meaning in life, not feeling supported or confident, and more.

We may agree that current efforts are helpful and necessary but continue to wonder “How can I myself actually help make a difference for others?”

Getting Back To the Basics

If you ever find yourself asking this question, then it may be helpful to get back to the basics. At its core, caring for others is not the specialized action of certain trained professionals. While it does take training and expertise to provide therapy, prescribe medications, or teach, the most impactful thing that we can do to better each other’s mental health is to understand the impact that we can make through our own individual actions.

Making things easy for others through service is at the core of our religion. The Prophet taught us that “Whoever helps ease one in difficulty, Allah will make it easy for him in this world and the hereafter” [Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2699] and that “we must make things easy and not difficult” [Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 69, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 1734] for others. Here are helpful steps to take and empower yourself to make a positive difference in the mental health and well-being of your own community.

 – Recognize that you have a role to play

The first step is to remember that each one of us has a role to play in improving our own mental health and the mental health and well-being of those around us. You can think of mental health as a “social” form of health—an individual’s environment and support system has a significant impact on their mental well-being. Just as other people (like your friends, family members, strangers, co-workers, and others) impact your mood and wellness, you also impact others’ moods and overall wellness. In Islam, we are taught to first take care of ourselves, our families, our communities, and to give each their due right. This teaching highlights how important the actions we take with the people we are closest with in life truly are.

Recognize that your actions and presence in someone’s life may be much more impactful for their health than the actions or resources provided by a mental health professional, teacher, etc.

 – Your actions have an impact, so choose kindness and gentleness

PC: Dan Meyers (unsplash)

The second step is to understand how your actions and behaviors can impact the mental health of people you meet in your daily life. Consider the times in your own life when (for example) an angry driver cutting you off in traffic has ruined the rest of your day, or conversely, when (for example) a friend bringing you a cup of coffee has made you feel supported and loved. The Prophet taught us that “Allah is gentle and He loves gentleness in all matters,” [Sunan Ibn Majah 3689] and that “whoever is kind…Allah will forbid him from entering Hellfire.” [al-Sunan al-Kubrá lil-Bayhaqī 20806] He also taught us that small actions done consistently are more beloved to Allah than large acts done sporadically. In fact, research shows that the smallest acts of kindness can significantly improve the well-being of not only the receiver of the kindness, but also the giver.

Embody kindness and gentles through small actions to help those around you, and do not underestimate their impact on well-being.

 – Strive to do more than actions and develop good character

The third step is to aim to be kind and gentle so consistently that it becomes a part of who you are. The Prophet taught us that “the religion itself is entirely good character.” [Madārij al-Sālikīn 2/294] Character is a step above actions because it reflects actions done so consistently and intentionally that they come to represent the essence of who someone is. Good character entails being kind and gentle to one another, just as the Prophet was with his companions and all who he met. By striving to develop good character and acting kindly and gently on a consistent basis, we become a positive and ever-present force for well-being in the lives of those around us.

Develop good character by choosing to be kind and gentle every day and in every interaction. No moment is too small to choose to be kind and help those around you.

This Mental Health Awareness Month, don’t think of mental health as something that only matters when things go wrong or when life is hard, and don’t think that professionals are the only people who can help address it. Rather, consider how your own everyday actions impact the well-being of those around you. The Prophet modeled for us a life of gentleness, kindness, empathy, and utility to the broader community. We should strive to follow his example because it only takes one person’s kindness to better another person’s life immeasurably.

Related:

– Cultivating Mental Well-Being in the Muslim Community [Part I]: Debunking Myths, Steps Toward Seeking Support – MuslimMatters.org

– Our Struggles – Mental Health And Muslim Communities | The Family and Youth Institute – MuslimMatters.org