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How the Grinch Stole Eid

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Dr. O blogs at Muslim Medicine, a site that strives to serve only the freshest grade-A certified ẓabiḥah ḥalāl comedy. Contact your local ḥalāl butcher for more details.

Every Muslim down in Islamville liked ‘Eid, a lot!

But Abu Grinch, who lived north of Islamville, DID NOT.

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Abu Grinch hated ‘Eid, oh you might think it treason!

But don’t ask why, no one quite knows the reason.

It could be, perhaps, some angry Masjid uncles were mean,

Or perhaps no sister wanted to marry a guy so hairy and green

But I think the most likely reason of all,

May have been that his heart was two sizes too small.

But whatever the reason, his heart or his cold whims,

He stood there during Ramadan, hating the Muslims.

Staring down from his cave with a Grinchy frown,

At the hungry Muslims about to break fast in their town.

For he knew every Muslim down in Islamville below,

Were busy cooking meals and baking tasty dough.

“They’re putting out dates and drinks!” he snarled with a sneer.

“Tomorrow is ‘Eid-ul-Fitr- it’s practically here!”

He trembled, his cold heart beating like Zain Bhikha’s drumming,

“I must find some way to stop ‘Eid from coming!”

For tomorrow, he knew- all the little Muslim girls and boys,

Would jump, shout, and play joyously with their new toys!

And the noise… ugh, the noise! The Noise! Noise! NOISE! NOISE!!

All the Muslims, young and old, would embrace one another and hug

And they’d hug! And they’d hug! And they’d HUG! HUG! HUG! HUG!

Not once, not twice, but three times- oh, such a touching display

That the mere thought of it caused Abu Grinch to wince in dismay

THEN they’d do something that he hated most of all,

Every joyous Muslim, the big and the small,

Family, friends, and perhaps a loving soul mate,

Would all gather together and start to celebrate!

Uncles fondly reminiscing about good times long past,

While Aunties set up matches to get their kids married fast,

Young men playing XBOX and talking about sports and cars,

While young sisters make henna designs and swoon over Bollywood stars.

Cute little kids full of energy would rush about, jump, play, and sing,

And the furious Abu Grinch would shout, “I must stop this WHOLE THING!”

Then he got an idea! An absolutely AWFUL idea.

Abu Grinch got a terribly awful idea!

“I know just what to do!” Abu Grinch laughed in his throat.

And he grabbed his favorite hat and his puffy old coat.

And he chuckled and chortled, “What a great Grinchy plot!”

“I’ll turn them against each other; divide and split up the whole lot!”

And so Abu Grinch crept into the joyous town, completely unaware,

He began to speak poison to the Muslims, their emotions he’d ensnare.

What a delightful topic moon-sighting can be… oh, how swell.

Grand fights to start Ramadan, and the same fights in its farewell!

A stroke of a few egos, the spewing of jealously and spite,

Fanning flames in a family reunion, turning it into a bullfight!

The joy of ‘Eid was slowly being robbed; clear to anyone who could see,

Abu Grinch tried to take what the Muslims needed most- sweet harmony.

And as he chuckled and reveled in his cold-hearted glee,

He found himself towering over tiny little sister Imani.

She frowned at Abu Grinch, her tiny eyes welling up with tears,

“Why are you doing this?” she asked through his sneers.

“Sweet girl,” hissed the Grinch with a sinister scowl,

“They turned their backs on me, treated me quite foul”

Abu Grinch’s face snarled, “They don’t care at all for me.”

“And those who take away joy, don’t deserve to be happy.”

And then something happened, that Abu Grinch hadn’t planned,

Little sister Imani wiped her tears away and gently took his hand.

“Someone was mean to me once, too” she said without fear,

“But in Ramadan I forgave them, and I gave them gifts every year”

And so amongst all the Muslims fighting and arguing on every inch,

She took her small ‘Eid gift, a toy pony, and handed it to Abu Grinch.

“’Eid isn’t about the moon or the money” she said with a smile,

“It’s about sharing happiness, that’s what makes it worthwhile.”

Abu Grinch felt wobbly, his mind swept into a blur,

He never felt this way before, she caused quite a stir!

The Muslims around him overheard her words and felt its touch,

Who knew a child’s sweet innocence could teach them so much?

Abu Grinch balanced himself, his mind still feeling sore,

And then he thought of something he hadn’t before.

“Perhaps this day of ‘Eid means something much more.”

“A gift of escape from hardship and sadness that Muslims ask for.”

The ice of Abu Grinch’s cold heart began to melt as he felt inspired,

He finally found the happiness and welcome that he always desired.

And what happened then? Well in Islamville they say,

That Abu Grinch’s small heart grew three sizes that day.

‘Eid Mubarak Everyone!

Keep supporting MuslimMatters for the sake of Allah

Alhamdulillah, we're at over 850 supporters. Help us get to 900 supporters this month. All it takes is a small gift from a reader like you to keep us going, for just $2 / month.

The Prophet (SAW) has taught us the best of deeds are those that done consistently, even if they are small. Click here to support MuslimMatters with a monthly donation of $2 per month. Set it and collect blessings from Allah (swt) for the khayr you're supporting without thinking about it.

Hailing from New York, Dr. O is a current medical student who blatantly misappropriates his study time by posting absurd articles lampooning the weird things he often notices within the Muslim community. His articles often contain unhealthy doses of odd wit and humor, sprinkled with overly-pretentious medical-jargon, but covered in a sweet milk-chocolate coating of small sincere life lessons. Despite not actually having a medical license and pretending to impersonate an actual physician online, Dr. O aims to heal patients with just a tiny bit of bitter advice contained within a sugary pill of light-hearted laughter. He hosts his own blog, Muslim Medicine, at http://www.muslimmedicine.net.

14 Comments

14 Comments

  1. H Khan

    August 8, 2013 at 5:44 AM

    Superb!!!
    {though to be honest i thought it was a case of ‘no-samosas-sent’ to the Grinch for iftaari. Tis trauma at its severest.}
    Enough said, Bring on the Eidi and Khajur ya akhi!
    :)
    v well done mA!

  2. Fulan Fulani

    August 8, 2013 at 11:39 AM

    This has got to be the BEST post on this site ever!

  3. Yahya Ali

    August 8, 2013 at 12:11 PM

    As Salaam aliakum …’Taqabal Allahu minna wa minkum‘
    (May Allah accept it from you and us)

    ***Eid Mubarak***…the story is great but I think we should use a different character and name.

  4. mk

    August 9, 2013 at 2:22 AM

    theres a bigger picture here with a message. if you can move past the character, this brings up a very valid point. it’s sad to see on facebook people’s silly messages of the use of the character and no mention of the message this story is trying to deliver. then again, humor is not for everyone.

  5. wael77

    August 9, 2013 at 2:22 PM

    Funny. I like it, and of course it’s a commentary on how we let ourselves be divided by small things rather than focus on the big picture. Best of all, I can read this to my 7 year old daughter and I think she’ll enjoy it and learn something.

  6. Yahya Ali

    August 10, 2013 at 4:39 PM

    I’m an American Muslim convert. I grew up in a christian home. 40 years ago I was 7 and the Grinch stole Christmas….that’s the way it is and always will be….we have to be careful what and the the way we teach our kids….like I said before the story is great but I think we should use a different character and name.

  7. theAMTG

    June 14, 2015 at 4:34 PM

    One word.
    EPICAPAPOCALYPTIC.
    MaShaaAllah. :)

  8. Gul Azhar

    June 19, 2016 at 3:58 AM

    Well done, MA. I think its very well written and very relataeble. My family and I enjoyed it thoroughly. I’m definitely sharing this! :)

  9. Tratamento Estrias

    December 22, 2016 at 7:05 PM

    I loved the article one of the best and enlightening

  10. Curso do martinho

    December 26, 2016 at 6:09 PM

    Great article, my congratulations

  11. Tasneem Badat

    April 10, 2017 at 7:54 AM

    Brilliant! Absolutely Brilliant! JazakALLAHkhair.

  12. joao vieira

    February 25, 2018 at 8:46 AM

    Grinch is so creepy

  13. ana santos

    March 17, 2018 at 9:11 PM

    I never liked the Grinch

  14. Maria Eloisa

    March 17, 2018 at 9:12 PM

    Very nice

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