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Hajj Journal, Chapter 2: Leaving -Ruth Nasrullah

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This is a continuation of Hajj journal, chapter 1. The first leg of our trip took us from New York to Madinah. Once we got to the airport I continued to muse on the things for which I would ask God’s forgiveness. In a lecture I had listened to in preparation for hajj, the sheikh described the day of Arafat as the most important day of a Muslim’s life. I recalled the Prophet’s (peace be upon him) words about the day of Arafat:

There is no day on which Allah frees more of His slaves from Fire than the Day of Arafat, and He verily draws near, then boasts of them before the angels, saying: “What do they seek?”

December 29, 2005, ~9:15 p.m. At JFK. Feeling really good now after a brief bout of “eye ache” [pain in my eyes that’s often a precursor to a migraine]. I drank a tall Starbuck’s Americano and now I feel much more energized. I also got myself up and chatting, which helped. Talking to a friend, I found out her story is much like mine, although she’s a born Muslim from the middle east. She didn’t practice her deen for many years; about four years ago she returned to being a practicing Muslim, although her family hasn’t necessarily followed suit. Like me, she will be making du’a on Arafat for her closest family.

This afternoon on the way home from lunch Daughter kind of laughingly made reference to stupid terrible things I did as a mother and it made me cry. On Arafat I will have so much to beg forgiveness for as a mother. I apologized to her and told her my “bad mother moments” are top on the list of things I will ask to be forgiven for. I still can’t imagine what that day in Arafat is going to be like. There are so many things I’ve done wrong that have kind of hidden or festered somewhere inside me because of my inability to manage my feelings about them. I can only imagine what it will feel like to confront my guilt, acknowledge it, feel it as really part of my life and part of me and then beg for pardon.

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…~Midnight, I think. Aboard Saudi Air flight 34 headed to Madinah. The flight was scheduled to leave at 9 and just now left, but it was a delay I was prepared for, as we’ve been told again and again to anticipate delays and that patience will be essential to successfully navigate and finish this trip and the hajj. The plane has TV screens that during taxiing transmit the picture from a camera mounted outside the plane. When at long last the plane came to the takeoff strip and began speeding over the white arrows pointing out, out, out, I felt that now I am a pilgrim; now the pilgrimage has begun.

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The Prophet (SAW) has taught us the best of deeds are those that done consistently, even if they are small. Click here to support MuslimMatters with a monthly donation of $2 per month. Set it and collect blessings from Allah (swt) for the khayr you're supporting without thinking about it.

5 Comments

5 Comments

  1. Muslim

    December 10, 2007 at 11:12 AM

    I pray that all the pilgrims may have their sins forgiven and their prayers accepted.

    However, on another note, (I am not in a state of Ihram) I wonder what kind of muslims take advantage of other mulsims. My mother and father are on Umrah and Hajj and booked through a UK Luton company called Go4Hajj and Umrah Tours – or something like that.

    My folks paid £8,400 for the pair for a 3 week Umrah and Hajj package as they are getting on a bit and we (the children) wanted them to be comfortable as possible in the heat of Madinah and Mecca.

    I was flabbergasted to find out that that the tour company have reneged on everything they promised to the 100 or so pilgrims. They were promised good hotels and instead they end up in bad hotels with broken AC and have to share with others. Whilst the pigrims are in a state of Ihram and dont want to have heated exchanged with this company, I am preparing for an eye for an eye on this one. After the pilgrims get back I am going to make it my life’s dedication to highlighting people and companies that take advantage of muslims and especially pilgrims such as this tour company.

    It is amazing that people can con a pilgrim. My heart really cries for human kind and muslims on this.

    I hope that the above sister’s pilgrimage goes smoothly.

    Muslim.

  2. Pingback: muslimmatters.org » Hajj Journal, Chapter 3: Madinah

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