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Podcast | Happily Ever After (Ep 2) – What Are The Limits Of Wifely Obedience?

Published

March 7, 2023

In episode 2 of the “Happily Ever After” mini-series of the MuslimMatters Podcast, Zainab bint Younus asks Dr. Hatem al-Haj about one of the most controversial Muslim marriage questions: do Muslim wives have to obey their husbands, and if so, what are its limits?

The discussion begins with a thorough discussion of what the basic principles of a healthy Islamic marriage looks like. Dr. Hatem treats us to an in-depth fiqhi (jurisprudential) analysis of what wifely obedience to husbands consists of and is limited to, its conditions, and the ethical vs. the legal. No one wants to miss this episode!

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Dr. Hatem al-Haj was born in Cairo, Egypt and currently resides in NJ, USA. He was granted his PhD in Comparative Fiqh from al-Jinan University, Tripoli, Lebanon and his Master’s Degree in Islamic law from the American Open University. He is also board certified in Pediatrics and Pediatric Hospital Medicine by the American Board of Pediatrics. He is a senior member of the Fatwa Committee of AMJA and a fellow at the American Academy of Pediatrics.

Related:

[Podcast] Happily Ever After (Ep. 1) | How to Find Your Match Made In Jannah

Podcast: Sex, Marriage, and Mutual Obligations in Islam | Ustadh Mukhtar Ba

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Keep supporting MuslimMatters for the sake of Allah

Alhamdulillah, we're at over 850 supporters. Help us get to 900 supporters this month. All it takes is a small gift from a reader like you to keep us going, for just $2 / month.

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Zainab bint Younus

Zainab bint Younus (AnonyMouse) is a Canadian Muslim woman who writes on Muslim women's issues, gender related injustice in the Muslim community, and Muslim women in Islamic history. She holds a diploma in Islamic Studies from Arees University, a diploma in History of Female Scholarship from Cambridge Islamic College, and has spent the last fifteen years involved in grassroots da'wah. She was also an original founder of MuslimMatters.org.

1 Comment

Mehdi Nouioui

March 11, 2023 at 12:23 AM

Listening to your questions, I feel you built a feminist western bias
approach, you didn’t ask questions to ask for the right of the husband and the shortcomings of many sisters, in minute 1:36
Dr Hatem tried to move the discussion to what’s expected from both in the case of balanced relationship.
You kept bringing abstract examples and mentioning there’s many situations where men are abusive. Also there’s many toxic and abusive sisters. You don’t hear much about the patient men because they don’t take their tribulation outside to the public in most of the cases. Becarful sister from falling into this western feminist that’s affecting especially sisters living in the west and they have been affected through cartoons, movies, school curriculums, social lifestyles around them. We can simplify this to few points:
Family is like an organization will need a CEO or a Leader which Allah gave to the husband. The sister should obey her husband as long he’s not asking for Haram, she should challenge his decision, show disagreement, give advises and alternative and leave the final decision in his hand for the sake of Allah and sake of the family.

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