Ahh, niqab… the face veil that evokes so many emotions amongst so many people. And it just so happens that you’ve now decided that you want to start wearing it! However -coming from someone who has been wearing niqab for almost 15 years- here are some things you should do before deciding to wear niqab.

• Pray Salatul Istikhaarah

Is wearing the niqab right for you to do in your context? If you are unmarried, how do your parents feel about it, and how will it impact your relationship with them? (This applies to both Muslim and non-Muslim parents, by the way!) 

Some parents may have their own concerns about you putting on the niqab, whether based on their personal feelings, or valid worries about your safety (especially if you live in a place that may have higher rates of Islamophobia). Even if you disagree with their personal feelings (which may range from neutral dislike to intense hatred of the niqab – for whatever reason), remember that honoring your parents and seeking their pleasure is a higher spiritual priority than almost anything else, including voluntary acts of worship.

“Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him, and be good to your parents. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], “uff,” and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word.” [Surat al-Isra’; 17:23]

Abdullah ibn Amr reported: The Prophet said:

رِضَى الرَّبِّ فِي رِضَى الْوَالِدِ وَسَخَطُ الرَّبِّ فِي سَخَطِ الْوَالِدِ

“The pleasure of the Lord is in the pleasure of the parents, and the displeasure of the Lord is in the displeasure of the parents.” [Sunan al-Tirmidhī 1899, Grade: Sahih]

Ibn Taymiyyah writes:

وَيَلْزَمُ الْإِنْسَانَ طَاعَةُ وَالِدِيهِ فِي غَيْرِ الْمَعْصِيَةِ وَإِنْ كَانَا فَاسِقَيْنِ وَهُوَ ظَاهِرُ إطْلَاقِ أَحْمَدَ وَهَذَا فِيمَا فِيهِ مَنْفَعَةٌ لَهُمَا وَلَا ضَرَرَ فَإِنْ شَقَّ عَلَيْهِ وَلَمْ يَضُرَّهُ وَجَبَ وَإِلَّا فَلَا

“The human being must obey his parents in matters that are not sinful, even if they are both wicked. It is the apparent verdict of [Imam ]Ahmad [ibn Hanbal]. This is in regards to what benefits them both and is not harmful. Even if it is difficult for him but does not harm him, it is an obligation; otherwise, it is not.” [Fatāwá al-Kubrá 5/381]¹https://www.abuaminaelias.com/obedience-to-parents-limits/

In his work, Fat’h al-Baari (a commentary on Sahih al-Bukhari), Imam Nawawi entitled a section “Honouring one’s parents takes precedence over voluntary prayer and other actions” in reference to a hadith telling the story of Jurayj.²https://islamqa.info/en/answers/151653/should-he-interrupt-his-prayer-in-order-to-answer-one-of-his-parents-if-they-call-him ³https://www.islamweb.net/amp/ar/fatwa/9210/

• Purify your intention

Why do you want to wear the niqab? Have you done research about it and determined whether or not you follow the opinion that it is obligatory or an encouraged and voluntary good deed? Are you being pressured into it by someone – whether a peer group, a friend, or even a spouse? In the latter case, have you sought spiritual counsel and advice on how to navigate the situation? If you are living in a geographical or cultural context where niqab is the norm, or is expected to be worn, are you doing it solely because you feel like you have to – or are you solidifying your intention to make it for the Sake of Allah ?

“Actions are according to intentions, and everyone will get [in reward for] what was intended.” [Bukhari & Muslim]

• Make du’a to Allah for strength and conviction

So you’ve done istikhaara, your intention is pure, and you’re sure that you want to wear niqab for the Sake of Allah . That’s great! Now the next step is to make du’a to Allah , for the strength and the conviction to maintain wearing niqab.

Know that none of us are truly able to do things on our own; it is Allah who gives us the ability to do so. 

Of course, sometimes you will be in a situation or circumstance where it’s not possible to wear niqab full-time… and that’s okay! It doesn’t make you a hypocrite; you’re doing the best you can, and what is most appropriate for you, all for the Sake of Allah . 

A wonderful du’a that encapsulates how we can ask Allah for strength in worshiping him is the du’a that RasulAllah taught to Mu’adh ibn Jabal :

Mu’adh reported: The Messenger of Allah took hold of my hand and said, “O Mu’adh! By Allah I love you, so I advise you to never forget to recite after every prayer:

اللَّهُمَّ أَعِنِّي عَلَى ذِكْرِكَ، وَشُكْرِكَ، وَحُسْنِ عِبَادَتِكَ

Allâhumma a’innî alâ dhikrika, wa shukrika, wa husni ‘ibâdatika

“O Allah, help me remember You, to be grateful to You, and to worship You in an excellent manner” [Abu Dawud Book 16, Hadith 1422]

• Figure out what niqab style works for you!

From the classic Saudi-style tie-back niqab to the half niqab, from the khimaar style to the eyes-covered style… there are actually a lot of ways to wear niqab. There are also a lot of different fabrics to choose from! And of course – where are you going to get yours from? Depending on your location, you can purchase them in-person (especially in Muslim countries where they can be easier to get a hold of and try before purchasing) or online (there are several reputable online stores) – you might even be able to get a tailor to make you some customized ones!

Consider things such as how different fabric types will feel against your face. Is the fabric light and breathable, or heavy and suffocating? Do you need a warmer fabric for winter, and a lighter one for the summer heat? Think about the potential for headaches and migraines and what kind of niqab style will be best for you – for example, the tie-back style vs an elasticated band. What will be most comfortable for you? There are little details to think about too, like if the niqab you’ve chosen leaves a really uncomfortable red line on your nose (seriously, those hurt… especially after a few hours). Mix and match as desired for your requirements! 

• Be prepared

You might expect that I’m going to warn you about Islamophobic violence first and foremost, but the truth is that sometimes the greatest opposition to a Muslim woman wearing niqab comes from within her own family and community. There are people who will be judgemental and negative, making comments from “That’s so ugly!” to “Are you trying to look like an Arab?” to “No one is going to want to marry you!” and “Ugh, how backward and oppressive of you!” 

And yes, depending on where you are, you may also face some level of Islamophobic violence, or at the less extreme end of things, hateful looks and snide comments or microaggressions. You will need to develop a thick skin in all of these situations and figure out how you want to handle them. Sometimes it’s best to ignore them, sometimes a sarcastic comment can shut up the unwanted negativity, sometimes you have to kill ’em with kindness. As always, turn to Allah and ask Him for strength and support!

“And be patient over what they say and avoid them with gracious avoidance.” [Surah Al Muzzammil; 73:10]

“The (faithful) slaves of the Beneficent are they who walk upon the earth modestly, and when the foolish ones address them answer: Peace!” [Surah Al Furqan; 25:63]

• Yallah, just do it!

Sometimes we paralyze ourselves into inaction by overthinking and overanalyzing the situation. Shaytan loves to mess with our heads and discourage us from doing anything that will draw us closer to Allah . So sometimes… we just need to jump into it! Bismillah!

Congratulations!

If you’ve gone through this process and decided to wear niqab after all, then congratulations! Following in the footsteps of the Mothers of the Believers and committing to this act of worship is a big deal and not to be underestimated. May Allah always strengthen you in your love for Him, and draw you ever closer to Him through the small but consistent good deeds, ameen.

Related:

– Niqabi In A Chocolate Shop: A Niqab Story

– What the Niqab Taught Me About Myself As A Muslim Convert and a Latina