Reader’s Opinion: What do you Love Most about your Parents?

33 Comments

1. 

   Amatullah

   April 7, 2011 at 12:24 AM

   I have so many memories! I’ll just share one :)

   I was one of those children who got scared of everything (literally), and I would end up going to my parent’s room nearly every night because something (like a shadow) scared me, until I was 9. My parents never yelled at me to grow up or stop being a baby, but they always took me in and even setup a small mattress on the floor for me even though I had my own room :)

   What do i love most about them? subhanAllah, I guess this is true for all parents but their unconditional love for their children and the sacrifices they make for their children without even thinking about it. It is so amazing.

   Specifically my parents, I love my dad’s sense of humor, I love his openness to talk with us, I love how he still treats us like his babies even though we are adults, I love that he always brings something home for us or my mom. I love how he raised my brothers to be men. I love how he always expresses his love for us. I love how he was able to sacrifice having my mom around so she could study with us in Egypt. I love how he helps my mom around the house. I love my mom’s dedication to seeking knowledge, mashaAllah she trumps a lot of us young ppl. I love that she expresses her love through actions more than words. I love it when she takes care of me when I am sick – no one does it like her. I love how she taught us Islam at a young age, even though we were not able to appreciate it then. I love that she instilled manners in us. I love her amazing smile, mashaAllah, it will cheer you up. And of course, I love her cooking, even though I can make the exact same dishes – hers are just special :D

   Rabbirhamhuma kama rabbayani sagheera!

   Reply
2. 

   KS

   April 7, 2011 at 3:30 AM

   SubanAllah, when I first saw this series, this was the first question that I thought should be asked. I even thought of suggesting it, and I was pretty stoked to see it here, Alhamdulillah.

   My Nurayn .. where do I begin?

   Alhamdulillah the first and foremost is their love, and sacrifice.

   My mom is my best friend, she’s my rock, her sacrifices are well beyond measure. I love her love for Islam, how she gets lost in reading and studying Islamic knowledge for hours. I love her playfulness and kindness. I love how she gives me a compassionate verbal smack whenever I need it, because you go back and you realize how true those words are and those words do wonders to you. I love the bond that we have. She can read me like a book, and I’m sometimes shocked at her pin point accuracy. I love the ‘deep’ talks that we have. I love her giving nature, she is incredible with my friends. I love her incredible cooking, too many people suggest we go into the restaurant business, or tell me about what a good cook she is, though they ate at our house years ago. I love her strength and her passion. Though many times I don’t feel worthy, I secretly enjoy when she comes to me and tells me about something that is bothering her and we discuss and try to find solutions. She is my foundation.

   My dad’s most defining quality is his patience and tawakkul in Allah. I love his incredible shy and quiet nature (even more shy than me) he says very little. I love the way he does dhikr, just quietly sitting with a light smile. His generosity and kindness are beautiful. He has a personality where people simply respect him. He has a very gentle nature. I love the way he always looks out for his siblings. I love his love for kids. His kindness to animals is a treat to watch. When I was a little too skinny my dad would cook special ‘yummies’ just for me, and he still brings us treats. He may not be expressive but we feel his love from his emotions, how he tears up when he sees us after he comes back from a trip. Or how he automatically gets sick when I or my siblings go thorough a big trial. He has a deep heart with soft tongue. He is my foundation.

   May Allah bless them entirely and make my siblings and I a source of great sadaqah jariyyah for them, ameen.

   Rabbirhamhuma kama rabbayani sagheera.

   Reply
3. 

   AnonyMouse

   April 7, 2011 at 4:57 AM

   There is way too much I love about my parents…

   I love how they raised us in an environment that was open, friendly, knowledgeable, and above all, Islamic.

   I love how they worked so hard to give us special opportunities – like summer camping, road trips across Canada, martial arts, big fun ‘Eids with our extended family, and so much more – to make up for the everyday things that we (thought) we didn’t get like other kids (videogames, TV, friends our age, etc.).

   I love how they instilled in us a deep appreciation and need for volunteering, for servicing our fellow Muslims. I will always feel somewhat incomplete if I know I’m not utilizing myself for the Ummah in some way.

   I love how my dad is a total goof at home in contrast to his serious-ish demeanor outside.
   I love how my mom can act like one of my friends and tease me and try to act cool (while I roll my eyes at her, lol).

   I love the casual, loving relationship I have with my parents, while knowing I can always turn to them in difficult times and they won’t get overprotective and interfering, but will always have wise, practical advice and listen to my bawling my eyes out or venting in a rage.

   May Allah reward my parents for the way they raised me and my brothers, the way they continue to raise us, and the way they will no doubt remain in parenting mode for the rest of their lives!

   Reply
4. 

   Haleh

   April 7, 2011 at 5:51 AM

   Masha’Allah I really like this post. Such a beautiful reminder for us to be the best to our parents.

   What I love most about my parents is that they instilled so much self-confidence in me by always making me feel special. They showed me respect in the way they communicated with me and made me feel like a valuable person. They would ask my opinion and encourage every little effort I made. It’s so critical to develop a child’s self-esteem from early on or else they will suffer throughout life.

   They also made me love Allah and love Islam. They never forced me to do anything – it was always with loving, encouraging words. Although I may not have practiced my Islamic obligations as well growing up, but my heart was filled with love for the things I did do. Now I try to always use the encouraging method with my kids and not scare them into practicing.

   Alhamdulillah – I think like all immigrant parents they sacriticed a lot to provide us with the best. I especially appreciate how my mom taught me to be grateful for every little thing and to see the beauty in all things and all people. She is one of the most positive people I know.

   Haleh

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5. 

   zookinigrin

   April 7, 2011 at 10:05 AM

   when I turn 7, on the eve of eid my mom stayed up to sew me my first prayer garment. we don’t have much at the time and mom had just become a single mother with the passing of my dad. she didn’t have the money to buy new cloth but a neighbor had ask mom to sew for her a new prayer garment. since there was some scraps left from that task my mom was able to make a small prayer garment for me. i remember staying by her side that night as she sew it for me. i was so happy that I have my own prayer garment and I had something new to put on when we go to the prayer hall on eid morning. i kept that hundred percent garment until it no longer does the work to cover me. when my own daughter turned 7 a few years ago, I did the same thing for her. I stayed up at night and after work after work to hand sew for her her first hijab. I told my daughter this is our family tradition. I hope she will do the same when her daughter turn 7.

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6. 

   SabrunJameel

   April 7, 2011 at 11:19 AM

   Subhannallah,

   Rabbirhamhuma kama rabbayani sagheera INDEED. Such a beautiful Ayah subhanallah…just look the ayahs that follow it…
   Truly nothing is omitted in our deen.
   Radhitu Billahi Rabba, Wa bi Islami Deena wa bi muhammadin Rasoola

   Reply
7. 

   mash Allaah

   April 7, 2011 at 12:04 PM

   mash Allah for above experiences. may Allah bless and protect your families.

   I did not have the best of child hoods if one compare with above experiences mash Allah Tabarak Allah, alhamdulillah ‘ala kulli haal. Having always seen my parents not respecting each other’s feelings, fighting like children among each other made us siblings discuss at times how not to be parents/spouses. It as horrible and in american society they have various names for it like Post traumatic Stress an adhd and what not for things they and their children had to go through. may be such children should not marry or even if they do then with a psychiatrist or those into psychology and / or counseling, as Faraz Rabbani hafidhahullah suggested once, with her permission. Others sour grapes here will get their reprogrammable angels soon insh Allaah.
   No sympathies please.

   Alhamdulillah for the blessing of Islaam, The later developed understanding of Islaam, knowledge and manners with true respect, love for the parents learnt from Ibn Faqih’s Rules of Engagement in Michigan, may Allah forgive him and his parents, everything changed. It turned upside down so much so that it does not took a second to decide to leave a six figure lucrative job in North America, after once Ammi asked me not to go back. My father always termed me mubtadi for raising hands in salah, until I gave in that additional sunnah just to make him happy. may Allah accept this and have my parents be pleased with us siblings through their service at least. Things haven’t changed between my parents still as they even refuse to fill hajj forms together but I weep in the nights for them to develop affection and sakeenah for each other and I still shop around for strategies to make create Islaah of parents. I don’t know what else try to do when someone refuse to accept reality. Its a beautiful world. Alhamdulillah. No matter how much we grow up we remain the same old nappy/diapered children for them. They stayed married for us children for 30 years, I can’t imagine such a couple staying under one roof for 30 days. Even if I give my skin to make their sandals it won’t suffice. Unless we have our own children, we may never be able to realize and truly appreciate our parents in real life. Alhamdulillah, its all from Allaah and to Him we will return. Things change so much so that, alhamdulillah now when I try massage feet of my mother when she retire to bed, her quibble, why do I have to take special care in messaging her feet alone. why not does her head or hands get the same attention Little does she know my intention, my jannah lies under her feet.

   O Allah please forgive our mothers, please forgive our mothers please forgive our mothers, PLEASE forgive our fathers please forgive me and my sibling, and enter us in your mercy. You are the most merciful and constantly merciful.

   Reply
8. 

   Muhammad

   April 7, 2011 at 1:02 PM

   Alhamdulillah. My parents are like mountains, fortresses of strength for me. I just have to look at them, be in their presence and I feel recharged. May Allah preserve them and all of our parents. For parents who have passed away, may Allah make their graves gardens of jannah and give the children patience. Aameen.

   Reply
9. 

   Siraaj

   April 7, 2011 at 1:55 PM

   Through thick and thin, my family has always been there to support me, always made sure I was living comfortably, and always made sure I wanted for nothing. My mother’s focus when teaching me Islam was the best, it was kind, gentle, and all about having a relationship with Allah and living sincerely for his sake.

   As a parent now with 3 of my own kids, alhamdulillaah, I have a greater appreciation for what they went through to raise me, the sacrifices a parent has to make to give priority to their kids, and I also understand why they stopped after having mischievous two boys :)

   Siraaj

   Reply
10. 

    Cucumberr

    April 7, 2011 at 2:10 PM

    MashaAllah, great topic! :)

    SubhanAllah, I too can think of countless things in response but I’ll share a few.
    Ever since I was young, I’ve had an obsession with pens. If I see a good pen, I just have to write with it and try to buy it any chance I get. My dad, may Allah bless him, would go out and buy me a really nice pen on Fridays and after a while, I started expecting my ‘weekly jumu’ah pen’ :) Till this day, he always buys me pens, books, gadgets, and random office supplies because he knows I’ll never have enough of them.

    What I love most about my father is that he is my inspiration. When I first started my blog, it was more or less a personal diary of random thoughts and stories but as time went on, I started to reflect on the conversations my father and I would have. I was amazed at how he was able to tie Islam to any topic and make any issue relevant to the fundamentals of our deen. His thirst for knowledge, his generosity, his love, his character, his poetry, are just some of the things that inspire me each day. As I’m sure all of you have experienced, our parents make us who we are and I can attest to that walhumdulillah.

    My mother is beyond words. What I love most about her is that I don’t have to say anything and she just knows what’s going on with me. She can read me better than I can read myself and sometimes, that’s the most valuable thing to have–someone who understands you. Alhumdulillah, silence is never awkward between us and that’s how I know our relationship is strong. :) She knows how to help me solve my problems by saying just the right things at the right time. <3

    May Allah enter them into Jannah bi ghayri hisaab. Allahumma Ameen.

    Reply
11. 

    sakina

    April 7, 2011 at 2:17 PM

    My mom play fights with all of us and can make a pun out of anything. My dad downloads essential apps for our phones, so we get a balance of Islamic and scientific knowledge and complains of domestic abuse when we have pillow fights
    Mashaallah only Allah knows how much reward our parents will get. Every single deed we do that they taught us to do will be in their accounts inshaallah

    Reply
12. 

    DiscoMaulvi

    April 7, 2011 at 2:36 PM

    They say you can never truly appreciate your parents until you become a parent yourself. Once you go through the roller coaster of love, anguish, despair, hair-tearing, head-banging, etc that is parenthood, you truly appreciate what your parents did for you.

    For me, my mother has been the main anchor throughout my life. Whether it is waking up in the morning no matter what to make me breakfast, or the countless hours she spent making me do homework and studying, she has always been a super influence in my life.

    My father, has not been in the forefront of things but I always know that somewhere I have someone whom I can go to with my problems (were a need to arise which my mother had not already dealt with!).

    I sometimes feel really guilty that I do not give my parents the due that they deserve. May Allah forgive me for this. May Allah have mercy on my parents, grant them a long life and grant them the highest station in Paradise. Aameen.

    Reply
13. 

    Fatima

    April 7, 2011 at 7:18 PM

    as years pass by, i realize more and more how much they mean to me.
    when i was a little child, they worked hard to raise me righteously and i wasn’t clearly aware of their methods. from time to time their decisions and rules seemed weird to me.
    now i pray to God to give me the same strength they had in raising my brothers and me. that’s the greatest think i am thankful for, to them and to Allah, helping me to find a right way.

    second thing is the way we talk. many of my friends, who have more liberal parents, envy me on the relationship i have with my ‘mama’ and ‘babo’ (bosnian expressions). of course, topics with mother are of wider range, but it happens to me very often that my friends can’t believe i talked about things like boys with my father. and whenever i have some doubts about things in life, i ask them what to do. in situations when i have to make ‘fast decisions’ and they’re not there, i ask myself: what would my father/mother do?

    they’re like a light that is leading me towards Jannah.

    Reply
14. 

    Ifrah Jama

    April 7, 2011 at 8:03 PM

    My mother has played not only the role of a mother but a father as well. She sacrificed 18 years of her life for my brother and I, she only asks for the smallest things in return: getting good grades, keeping the house clean, talking with her, kissing her when she comes from work, ect. It is without a doubt, that my mother’s love is beyond immeasurable.
    I have noticed that when my mother is angry I am as well, and when she is happy I am as well. So I know that inorder to have a good day my mother needs to be happy. Even though my father left us, and I can see the years on my mothers face she has shown me that with lifes struggles you cannot lose sight of your purpose in life, and that this dunya is a prison for the believer, so don’t count the difficulties just now that Allah(swt) mercy is always there. She is my teacher, my best-friend, and my confidant. So i ask Allah(swt) to be pleased with my mother and to grant me the dua of my mother and insha’allah to bring ease for my mother and grant her jannatul-firdus Ameen. :DD

    Reply
15. 

    Maya

    April 7, 2011 at 9:22 PM

    You’ll never know what your parents mean to you until you have your own child, the love I have for my parents grew more after I gave birth to my beautiful baby boy. The love I have for my parents is unconditional and I am grateful for everything they’ve done for me and my siblings.

    My father passed away 10 years ago and my mother has been the role model for me and my siblings ever since. She’s done so much for us and gave up her dreams to see us happy. I am grateful for everything she’s done for me and my siblings…

    After the war in my country, we did not have enough food for everyone so my mother would starve herself and tie her stomach to make the hunger go away. She would always feed us and eat last and sometimes not eat at all… This I will never forget. May Allah grant her the highest level of jannah… Ameen

    It kills me to see so many young people that take their mothers for granted.

    Here is little something that sums up what my mother means to me :).

    “Mama was my greatest teacher, a teacher of compassion, love and fearlessness. If love is sweet as a flower, then my mother is that sweet flower of love.”
    Stevie Wonder

    Reply
16. 

    Sumeya

    April 7, 2011 at 9:52 PM

    I really enjoy reading these comments! I love how my mother made an effort to raise me with the deen. Most of my friends are completely clueless about the stories in the Qur’an, the Prophets, or even the prayer. My mother would always make me watch Adam’s World dvds (which were the best) and we’d sing along to Yusuf Islam songs. She would force me to wake up early to attend Qur’an classes and would never let me miss a single lesson. I would constantly be frustrated by not being able to pronounce certain arabic letters or not reading as fast as the other kids, she would always be there to comfort me and remind me that it was not a contest. A few months back I had gone to a lecture where the Sheikh had asked us all to make a du’a for our parents. Then he asked a question that I had never taken into consideration. “Are you a good child?”. That question pushed me to tears and had me calling my mother. Even though I had just argued with her that very morning, she comforted me and told me that she would never be disappointed in me as long as I remembered Allah (swt). I love this article and I pray that Allah (swt) rewards all of our parents with the highest level of Jannah. Ameen.

    Reply
17. 

    Mommas Boy

    April 8, 2011 at 12:26 AM

    A very odd and funny and memorable thing my mom does is calling me into her room after her salah or just generally to sit on her lap for a minute while we talk. I shyly oblige, but i love it :)

    [must be quite an image cuz I’m a 22 yr old bearded dude sitting on my mommy’s lap (did I mention she’s shorter than me and very cutely chubby?)]

    Alhamdulillah for being able to walk to the next room to give my mother 3 kisses on her cheek as she sleeps.

    Jazakallahukhair for the post / reminder and for the commenters to share their stories (all 16 ppl).

    Reply
    • 

      anna

      August 30, 2012 at 2:34 PM

      so sweet of her :) may u both live together for thousands of years

      Reply
18. 

    Tariq Ahmed

    April 8, 2011 at 11:51 PM

    Alhamdolillah, Who Chose for me my parents. “Rabbir ham huma kama rabbayaani sagheera.” And I would say that by their love and patience with me, Allah taught me to be awed by His love and patience for humanity. And yes, it is a different appreciation one has for one’s parents when it is your turn to be patient, to be forgiving, to be generous and loving.

    It is said that generation after generation knowledge is gradually taken away. And we may weep many tears with the passing of a generation of scholars and marvel at the generations of people of knowledge long past.

    But imagine how bereft the world would be if the same were true for the love and mercy of parents for their offspring?!! If each generation represented a shortcoming to the one before… So I still hold hope that the next generation will also grow up and marvel at their parents even as I marvel at mine, alhamdolillah.

    Reply
19. 

    Tariq Ahmed

    April 8, 2011 at 11:55 PM

    Oh, and listen to “Parents the Middle Gate of Jannat” by Shaykh Waleed Basyouni — I heard it live, and it made me weep!

    Reply
20. 

    hamid

    April 9, 2011 at 9:27 PM

    salamunalaikum!

    I like their simplicity, patience and perseverance.
    Every deed has certain amount of reward but patience….Allah Alone knows!

    Let mercy befall them like it did upon me when i was a toddler, let joy bloom on their face as it did on mine in my childhood life.Ameen!

    Reply
21. 

    Nayma

    April 10, 2011 at 12:01 AM

    May Allah reward my mother for teaching me to care for others even if they are thousands of miles away and you don’t know them.

    May Allah reward my father for teaching me about Allah and honesty.

    Reply
22. 

    Nurliyfad

    April 10, 2011 at 10:48 AM

    My mother had taught me to recite Al Fatiha every night before I went to sleep. She would make me recite after her, line by line, never raised her voice to hasten me or out of irritation for my poor pronounciation.

    She constantly reminded me that I shouldn’t be scared because Allah will protect me, even more when I recite this.

    We moved into a new home and I finally got my own room. My first night, I was obviously scared, then I remember and thought – Mama said to read Al Fatiha and I won’t be scared, let’s see if this works…

    Next thing you know – it was already morning. Masha Allah. How kind Allah was to entertain my test..( I was 6 years old ok) and that was the beginning of how my love and eeman grew for Allah azza wa jal.

    May Allah grant my mother and father mercy. May He protect them from the evil of this world and in akhirah. May He grant them success on the day of Judgement. May Allah grant them Paradise and most importantly, may He reunite us as a family once again in the hereafter. Ameen.

    Reply
23. 

    ChasingPurity

    April 10, 2011 at 7:55 PM

    I love how no matter what we go through, and all the times my parents have put up with me antics, things I don’t kno if I have the patience for with my own children, my parents love me & have devoted their lives endlessly to making sure that me & my brothers stay on the path of Islam. I love you, Mommy & Daddy. ツ

    Reply
24. 

    Nadia

    April 11, 2011 at 1:55 AM

    My mom passed away on the 3rd of April 2011, what is my fondest memory of her, it was her peacefulness, her imaan, you would never find her without her Quraan, and she was in a constant state of wudthu and prayer. She was unable to help herself in the bathroom, because she was so ill, she had cancer throughout her body, the day she passed away she saw herself to the bathroom, washed herself, took wudthu and made Fajr salaah, and still recited her Surah Yasien, she became very ill and passed away. May we emulate her Insha Allah and may Allah SWT grant her Jannah tul Fierdose insha Allah

    Reply
    • 

      abu abdAllah Tariq Ahmed

      April 11, 2011 at 2:08 AM

      inna lillahi wa inna alayhi rajioon. and ameen to your duas.

      Reply
    • 

      nayma kose

      April 12, 2011 at 8:43 AM

      Ameen

      Reply
    • 

      anna

      August 30, 2012 at 2:29 PM

      may ALLAH forgive her and her soul rest in peace

      Reply
25. 

    goldenMean

    April 11, 2011 at 1:58 PM

    Great topic and great advise. I struggle sometimes to not get angry at my mom, and dad, and can’t find reason in my head to not get upset everytime topics sensitive to me are brought up. Sometimes I look back, and feel extremely guilty about getting upset, but I can’t seem to control my emotional outburst when I should. The son in the video unfortunately reminds me of myself. My dad has never shown affection to my mom openly, and I don’t know how to do the same. It’s seems natural for some children, but I fail to display my affection for my parents. This is not always the case of course, inside, I am trying to break away from old habits and can’t find it in me to change my behavior…however reading this article helped me call my dad & mom who are abroad to see how he they are doing…inshallah they don’t bring up topics that annoy me..

    Reply
26. 

    SA

    April 15, 2011 at 5:25 PM

    There are no human beings in my life that are like my parents. May Allah SWT protect them and give them a long, joyful life and unite us in Jannah.

    Reply
27. 

    Bint Alam

    April 19, 2011 at 5:12 PM

    Sooo much to mention subhaanAllaah.

    My dad is extremely caring about us Alhamdulillah, even now when he is 63 years of age and has to walk with a stick he still buys fruits for us, cuts with his own hands and brings in front of us. He even cuts the vegetables for my mom, he never forced on us anything and listened to our arguments very attentively…..i don’t have words to explain my gratitude to Allaah for such great parents! subhaanAllaah…..Rabbir’hamhumaa kamaa rabbayanee sagheeraa………….

    Reply
28. 

    Lusiana Trisnasari

    April 23, 2011 at 6:38 AM

    This kind of article always makes me speechless, because I live far away from my parents. They live alone. I always think about how lonely they are. I always pray for their healthy, but it won’t stop them for getting older.
    May Allah protect them.

    Reply
29. 

    Umm Abdullaah

    June 6, 2011 at 8:10 AM

    Masha Allaah, this is a wonderful post, and i intend to forward this link to all my contacts.

    What I love most abou my parents…..

    My Dad was one of the ‘cool’ dads. He ‘hung out’ with us as kids, and knew what was going on in our lives. And when my friends were sneaking around doing stuff, i would simply ask my dad. He never shot me down, but always helped me see the responsible side of my actions and any repercussions thereof. In time, my greatest censure for what i did or did not do as a teenager was ‘What would my father think?’
    Although he was not very knowledgeable about islaam, he instilled in us deep faith in our Deen and a habit of Salaah – missing it was the only reason he raised his hand against me (I’m an African, so that’s huge!). As a child, he had been forced to ‘convert’ to christianity to be able to attend school, so he taught us all to believe in islaam, not ceremoniously as with many of our people, but as THE way to salvation.
    He always said his legacy for his children was education, and never asked for more than that we give it our best – and he attended all my school functions. And even though he was not a rich man, we attended the best schools, and never wanted for anything in that.
    He thought us all the value of hardwork, honesty, ambition, taking time for the people you love, laughing out loud, helping the needy….. i could go on, for until he died 12yrs ago while fighting to protect his family against armed robbers/marauders, my father was my everything!
    I like to think his death led me to Allaah, because until then; my ‘deen’ had been to please my dad, May Allaah forgive him and grant him Matyrdom.

    My mum, i did not pay much mind to until my dad passed’ I hope Allah and she will forgive me in that. Beside the veritable giant of a manthat her husband was, she had been a steady but silent force no one reckoned with until she was widowed at 40, with 5 young children. Then only did I realise the quiet strength that was this woman who bore me. She raised us all till today when only the last 2 are still in University and dependent. She went from being a medium-scall business owner to a leading figure in our entire home state and the country, all without losing focus of what seemed to be spurring her on; her kids. And even at the height of her material success; even when she did not understand us – e.g. when i came home wearing a Niqab – she supported us, no matter what.
    Like my dad, she may not be the most knowledgeable and practising of Muslims; but i have yet to find anyone who epitomises the virtues of patience and fore-bearance more than my Mum. I pray I could hav just a part of that attitude myself.

    May Allaah forgive all the Muslims – the living and the dead of us – and unite us all in His Jannah.

    Reply