Disclaimer: Sadly, I’m not the one clever enough to come up with the post title.
Facebook, MySpace, Friendster, and whatever’s the latest and hottest in social networking… they’re all super popular, with millions of users all around the world. Most people reading this post probably has an account with one or more of these websites (including myself). Though not unique to any certain age group, it’s indisputable that these sites are most popular with the youth – midteens and up… and that’s where we should be most concerned.
Let’s backtrack a little, though. First of all, what are these sites and what do people do on them? Most of them, like Facebook, are considered to be sources of “social networking.” That is to say, you sign up and you’re almost immediately flooded with requests from people who want to be your “friends.” Some of these people you may know. Some you may not. You have the choice to accept and decline requests as you see fit. Aside from this – or actually, a part of it – is that you can upload pictures (many people put up pictures of themselves), let people know what you’re thinking and doing (sort of like a blog), and basically interact with other people online.
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In and of themselves, they’re not all that bad. What people do on them, however, is something else entirely. They can be, and are, used as sources of benefit: being able to keep in touch with distant friends and family, meeting like-minded people who can help you with projects and petitions, and more. There is, however, a much shadier side to it all.
Too many people give their personal information (tip #1: use a pseudonym and don’t give out sensitive info like your school, location, phone number, etc.); put up pictures of themselves without hijaab, inappropriate clothing, compromising positions; and behave online as they would not behave in public. Not only that, but there are always creeps and pervs just waiting to pounce! Furthermore, these sites are under no obligation to keep your information private. In fact, they do exactly the opposite – give other companies access to your information to use for their own nefarious money-making purposes.
I’m not being paranoid, either. The fitnah and the dangers are very real. Here are some examples of what’s happening:
These are just a few examples… it seems that few people realize how much of their personal information is able to be viewed and recorded by total strangers.
As Muslims, we have etiquettes to follow no matter where we are or what we’re doing… whether it’s in “real life” or the “cyber dunya.” Such etiquettes include hayaa andtaking care of how we interact with the opposite gender… basically, the way we must behave in real life is how we should behave online. This is something that all of us adults (or almost-adults! :P) need to keep in mind.
What I’m most concerned about is what Muslim youth are doing online. There are a lot of Muslim kids on Facebook and MySpace who are “friends” with random strangers, who are sharing personal information and chatting about intensely private things with them. Most of these kids’ parents don’t know that they’re registered with the site, what they’re doing on there, and who they’re chatting with. So parents: if your kid has access to a computer, whether at home or at school, and is Internet-savvy (which kid isn’t, nowadays?), then PLEASE make sure you know what your kids are doing online!
Here’s some advice to Muslim parents: In addition to warning your kids about the dangers of the cyber-dunya (I’m starting to really love this term!), you need to explain the importance of Islamic etiquette online. Whether we’re playing games, chatting to your friends, or interacting with total strangers, we need to be extremely careful and watchful. Those with access to digital cameras need to be careful with what pictures they’re taking and posting online. An explanation and gentle warning usually does the job; unfortunately, some people will only learn the hard way… which can be very scary.
In short, please be careful! I say this first to myself, because so much of my life (sadly) revolves around the Internet and I’ve probably made a few mistakes myself; and then to the rest of you, especially if you have kids, because I’ve seen what some of the younger kids who have access to the Internet do.
I especially urge you all to try to raise awareness of this subject at your Islamic centres and masaajid, because even though the Internet is so widely used, it is something rarely addressed by community leaders. Sadly, I’ve heard of way too many horrible things happening to people because of what they’ve done on the ‘Net, and I sincerely wish us all to be spared that kind of trouble.
May Allah protect us all from the fitnah of this world, online and off, ameen!
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Zainab bint Younus (AnonyMouse) is a Canadian Muslim woman who writes on Muslim women's issues, gender related injustice in the Muslim community, and Muslim women in Islamic history. She holds a diploma in Islamic Studies from Arees University, a diploma in History of Female Scholarship from Cambridge Islamic College, and has spent the last fifteen years involved in grassroots da'wah. She was also an original founder of MuslimMatters.org.
Funnily enough there’s a facebook group called ‘Brothers and Sisters against shady opposite gender relations’ (or something like that) that deal with pretty much the same issues.
My advice is not to add/accept anyone as a friend that you don’t know, and to set any necessary randomers to limited profile. For privacy and because putting people on limited profile is a little power trip in itself, muahaha
I also held the opinion above (i really hate facebook and all those things) but I have to admit It’s good for marketing and getting the word out for your events. My account is strictly for marketing “Tufaan” (www.tufaanmovie.com)
I refuse to have a facebook acct; i’m known as ‘anti-facebook’ or ‘the no-facebook loner’.
I’m probably the only one of my friends who doesn’t have one, and don’t plan on ever having one inshaAllah.
and I just see the absolute waste of time that site is IF you’re not sincerely using it for da’wah or promoting islamic events…other than that, I feel like it’s just looking at other people’s pictures and writing on a board (or wall, whatever it is).
I know people who have had fights on there, and they would completely embarass themselves because of what they write which would be open to everyone else and the pictures they put up somehow ‘leak’ to other people…the stories go on..
Also, I really don’t think sisters at all should be putting their pictures up, hijaab or no hijaab…I don’t think it’s appropriate because I think it’s removing her haya, any brother can go on there and look at her display picture (it was explained to me that only your ‘friends’ can see your pictures..)..this is my personal opinion. As you mentioned, people do things on there they wouldn’t do in public..so as sisters, I don’t think we should be posing and such if we would not do it in public…
my .02, wa Allahu ‘alam.
(lol at the title…wa ma adraaka ma facebook. nice.)
“In and of themselves, they’re not all that bad. What people do on them, however, is something else entirely. They can be, and are, used as sources of benefit: being able to keep in touch with distant friends and family, meeting like-minded people who can help you with projects and petitions, and more. There is, however, a much shadier side to it all.”
Thanks for saying that, it’s always important to stay balanced.
I was a crazy Facebook hater initially…then I started using it to promote community events. It’s an awesome way to reach out to young people who would otherwise be really tough to reach. And also for people who are just not too connected to the Muslim community, they may not mingle too much in person but everyone and their mamma is on Facebook nowadays. So there are definitely pro’s as well as the obvious con’s.
Like EVERYTHING else in life, it’s a matter of personal responsibility.
The answer is not to run scared or boycott things, it’s to educate ourselves. We can’t boycott every technological advancement or social situation that requires us to make a responsible decision…we just need to learn to be responsible.
I admit that I do have an FB account, but I’ve made a point of 1) restricting it to sisters, 2) keeping to people I know personally and/ or really trust, and 3) no personal pictures.
jazaki Allah khair sister AnonyMouse. advice appreciated. : )
I also like your approach sister Zaynab because FB, among other things, if used properly, may be a positive way of staying in touch with our younger Muslims or techy-type crowd.
But, first a reminder to myself before anyone else: everything should be done with moderation and good intentions.
I agree w/ you. I hardly ever open my facebook account or browse too many women who aren’t covered right, and MySpace just scares me. One day we will have niqaab book…lol.
My sheikh was asked recently about Facebook, Myspace and the like.
His response:
“La hawla wala quwata illa billah.
This is question of one’s nafs. Advertising one’s self ‘Here I am. Look at how important I am.’ etc.”
He then continued
“In addition to the 20 odd ahadith about the impermissible nature of pictures. It is haram for women to look at men unless it is a mahram of theirs.” And he quoted the sahih hadith of the 2 women with the blind man. And then some of the many hadith that prove that it is haram for a man to look at a woman.
“So both are haram. The only exceptions are for instruction/teaching” He quoted the hadith where the Prophet SalAllahu alaihi wasallam, taught the women without telling them to look away.
“Or for medical reasons or to identify someone in court.
So on what basis are you sticking your face up on there, where people from the opposite sex can see?… Get your pictures off of it. Get your names off of it.”
“It’s not a need. Our need is for wiliaya, for being close to Allah, so don’t sell yourself short.
Socialize the rest of life and die the same way you lived, in ignorance of the Divine? No realization, no travel to Allah- but I had a good time? Make a tawba and give it up.”
Sr. Zaynab, my comment made was intended to be tongue-in-cheek…
The reality is that the youth are using it, nothing we do will change that. We can discourage them (which will work with a minority) but those who have suggested that it be used to reach out to those who are already there have a point.
However, that notwithstanding, most of our youth are not doing anything productive with their presence on Facebook. By reaching out to them for events, we will affect some, but the reality is that for most it will change nothing.
But then again, I’m not the biggest fan of the internet either. It is a powerful tool for dissemination of information and it has tremendous potential be used for good, but ends up being used for alot of what is either evil or just plain waste of time.
I find it disturbing that for many young people, the internet, chat rooms, MSN Messenger, Paltalk, etc. seem to have taken the place of having real lives and personal contacts.
Salam – I was addicted to FB and ended up prying on so many of my friends Astaghfirullah! It took over my work i was on there 24/7 – sometimes not even doing anyting just staring at it. Writing silly update messages and just doing things that let’s say won’t help u get to Jannah. I then thought last month “why am i doing this? Have i gained anything? did i learn anything?” in actual fact i experienced a lot of free-mixing going on and it hurt me! So i came off! and i have more time for work, dawah and Deen study. FEELS GREAT and even better now i know im not being watched…or am I????
i have facebook account but
– i am friends only with ppl i know personally
– Only have female friends (and my brother) have no other male listed as friends even if they are my co-workers, i just ignore their request
– No pictures what so ever…..and only facebook to leave mssgs for friends instead of calling (saves time and prevents u from backbiting =)
It’s haram for women to look at men and men to look at women?
??????
Yes.
Sheikh Yusuf Al-Qaradawi, (who is by no means an ultra-conservative) states:
What Islam prohibits in the sphere of sex includes looking at a member of the opposite sex with desire; for the eye is the key to the feelings, and the look is a messenger of desire, carrying the message of fornication or adultery.
This is why Allah Almighty has commanded the believing men and the believing women alike to lower their gazes together with His command to guard their sexual parts: (Tell the believing men that they should lower their gazes and guard their sexual organs; that is purer for them. Indeed, Allah is well-acquainted with what they do. And tell the believing women that they should lower their gazes and guard their sexual organs, and not display their adornment, except that which is apparent of it; and that they should draw their head-coverings over their bosoms, and not display their adornment except to their husbands or their fathers or their husbands’ fathers, or their sons or their husbands’ sons, or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons, or their women, or those whom their right hands possess, or male servants who lack sexual desire, or children who are not aware of women’s nakedness; and that they should not strike their feet in order to make known what they hide of their adornment.) (An-Nur 24: 30-31)
Several divine injunctions are contained in these two verses. Two of them pertain to both men and women, namely, the lowering of the gaze and the guarding of the sexual organs, while the rest are addressed exclusively to women.
A difference is to be noted here between the expressions, ‘lower their gazes’ and ‘guard their sexual organs,’ signifying that while the sexual organs must be totally guarded without any leeway, the lowering of the gaze is only partial, because necessity and the general interest of the people require that some looking at members of the opposite sex be allowed.
‘Lowering the gazes’ does not mean that in the presence of the opposite sex the eyes should be shut or that the head should be bowed toward the ground, since this would be impossible; in another place the Qur’an says, ‘Lower your voice’ (Luqman 31: 19), which does not mean sealing the lips. Here, ‘lowering of the gazes’ means to avert one’s gaze from the faces of the passers-by and not to caress the attractive features of the members of the opposite sex with one’s eyes. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) told `All ibn Abi Talib, ‘Ali, do not let a second look follow the first. The first look is allowed to you but not the second.’ (Reported by Ahmad, Abu Dawud, and at-Tirmidhi)
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) considered hungry and lustful looks at a person of the opposite sex as ‘the zina (adultery or fornication) of the eye,’ according to his saying, ‘The eyes also commit zina, and their zina is the lustful look.” (Reported by al-Bukhari)
He termed the lustful look zina because it gives sexual pleasure and gratification in an unlawful way. This is also what Jesus (peace and blessings be upon him) is reported to have said in the Gospel of Matthew: You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’. But I say to you that everyone who so much as looks at woman with evil desire for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. (Matt. 5:2728)
Indeed, such hungry and lustful looks are not merely a danger to chastity but they also result in agitation of the mind and disturbed thoughts. End Sh. Qaradawi’s fatwa.
A definition of desire is useful here-
in Radd al-Muhtar `ala al-Durr al-Mukhtar the famous commentary on Fatawa-e-Alamgiri (also known as Fatawa Hindiyah) desire is defined as any physical inclination of the heart.
The ulema further state that:
It is not a condition that it be strong physical desire, or that it be accompanied by sexual thoughts or physical arousal.
Lack of desire is that one looks towards them as one would towards one’s child or towards a beautiful tree.
End Radd al Muhtar & commentary
So, given the above, yes looking at the opposite sex is haram, unless one is confident that such looking will arouse nothing more than looking at one’s own child does.
In the context of placing one’s pictures online, this is impossible to guarantee and in fact the opposite is likely.
Br. Abu Bakr: The smiley gave me the impression that you were being a bit tongue-in-cheek, I wasn’t really directing my comments to you. Sorry if it seemed like I was attacking you.
I completely understand the issues with Facebook/MySpace/etc, and I’ve seen a lot of what you are all worried about (pple acting inappropriately, flirting, etc.).
I’m just saying: the problem is bigger than a website. It’s silly to think that banning Muslim kids from this kind of thing is going to make them behave. If the root of the problem isn’t addressed it’ll just manifest itself in different ways.
And we have to be balanced! If you approach a kid who’s doing bad things online and tell them the internet is haram they’ll laugh in your face and continue what they’re doing. These things are not in-and-of-themselves haram, it’s what pple use them for. So why not just teach pple how to use them responsibly.
All the negative arguments could be made against blogs too, but here we are :)
I’m just trying to bring up the other side of the argument. And Allah knows best.
i kind of favor a different approach, and its related to the youth outreach series i posted up. when giving a khutbah on that topic (i did it at the end of the summer before school was in session) i mentioned how clueless some parents are, and that they need to go and visit their kids myspace pages, and see the pictures they have put up of themselves .. the expressions on the faces of the kids was priceless.
do facebook/myspace, but for kids even in high school, i think there needs to be some level of parental supervision. that is often enough to keep things in check. but most of the time, its kids w/computers in their own rooms, and parents have absolutely ZERO idea of their kids online lives.
No worry, Sr. Zaynab, I just wanted to make sure that was clear
I’m honestly not a big fan of blogs either : )
while this is said tongue-in-cheek, I actually mean it, I’m not a big fan of the internet; the fact of the matter is, for better or worse, we’re stuck with it and we might as well make the most of it by the following means:
(1) putting up useful content
(2) parental supervision
(3) self-discipline
and if enough of 2 and/or 3 are not present, then it must simply be avoided.
Call me old hat, but I favor the approach of the sheikh whose fatwa Alex quoted above: Those who are responsible for making Dawah should not leave it unclear that something is clearly harmful.
The way some people seek excuses these days for indulging in various things inappropraite, if they were to hear a scholar take a soft, nuanced approach towards Facebook (or for that matter TV, the much more pervasive fitna of our era) it would translate in their mind–unfortunately–to a conditional approval of the said action.
While taking a “hard line” will not affect some people (for reasons outlined in many of the above responses), there appears (wallahu a’lam) a need for a few scholars to be blunt (analogy: apples) and just give the fatwa in unequivocal language, and another set of scholars, Daees rather than Muftis, to make the bitter truth palatable and digestible (analogy: donuts) to those steeped in the habits or things being advised against.
How sadly ironic… no sooner has this been posted, but I discover, through Facebook, that someone close to me is involved in something she shouldn’t be.
*Sighs*
Once more I reiterate: Parents, keep an eye out on your kid’s online activities! Especially if they’re under the age of 14!
FB can be really haraam, or perfectly okay. It’s upto you to not compromise your hayaah online. especially online. Its so much to do more Haraam.
However, i really have to say that facebook has been an EXCELLENT tool in educating people about, advocating for and inviting people to events that that many people could never have known about.
Like everything else, it’s how you use it. You can use your TV to keep up to date with the news, or to watch dirt. You can use your mobile to keep in touch with friends and family, or to chat/text to the opposite sex unnecessarily. You can use Facebook to keep in touch and keep informed of events, or for the wrong kind of socialisation.
It all comes down to the individual, not the instrument.
I love facebook! It helps me promote MR, Halal Tube, Sports Halaqah and other projects. It also keeps me up to date with the latest Islamic events and I can spam 100s of Muslims links.
Facebook actually doesn’t like me. They send me warning messages for spamming people and “abusing” my power through facebook.
If you really tech savvy and a super nerd marketer you can really abuse facebook and get tons of hits to your site.
As a blogger, fb does provide a massive marketing opportunity as MR suggests. Also, I have been able to locate all friends via fb. Ultimately though, it provides another opportunity to waste time, as if we don’t have enough!
please join the facebook group “I don’t go on dates, I just eat ’em.”
Maybe that will pave the way for the proper use of facebook (or u might end up looking for a wife from the members of that group haha)
The fact is that we all know exactly why we log onto facebook(why does the heartrate suddenly increase when u scan the homepage for new notifications or inbox messages? lol….)
Sometimes though, we might log on for a noble purpose and then we look to the left side of the facebook page and see that terribly dressed woman…y3ni that was unintentional but it must be avoided. (btw me n my friend are trying to come up with a facebook app that disables all photos…lool..anyone down?)
may Allah swt keep all our hearts firm upon the path most beloved to Him swt and protect us all and keep us all away from everything He dislikes. Ameen.
P.S i was an addict myself, but for a couple of months i have been trying a new strategy…try it and lemme know if it works. Think about something as simple as THIS: would you like to die while wasting time on facebook? or while cutting short your facebookings and closing your eyes and reciting the kalima JUST for the sole pleasure of Allah swt (while no one is watching you except Allah swt)?
please let us know if this works….or share what works for u. Imagine the ajr you can get bi idhnillah if you get someone to make dhikr instead of excessive facebooking.
Allahu Akbar!!!
(for my punjabi folk, facebook changa vakht paya vey saarey musalmanaan nu, siapa jeya bera gharq hovey edda)
Subhan’ALLAH. I totaly agree witht the post. Its a tool that was made to get youngsters on there and enable them to open the doors of fitan. Although its a bad tool, its really good to keep in touch with friends who sometimes don’t answer their phones/emails. I suggest to eliminate all the sisters because thats how fitan start and to keep close friends and people you know on there, just like the rest said here mash’allah.
Jazakoum allah khair.
“I suggest to eliminate all the sisters because thats how fitan [sic] start”
even though its true sisters shudnt pose with their annoying kissing face or however, the bros shudnt look at the sisters in the first place…its a mutual responsibility
may Allah swt protect us all from this mini dajjal so many muslim youth have been influenced by
innalhamdolillah. bismillah. mashaAllah, MM rocks. :) having been persuaded to join Digg to promote articles on MM, i had begun to consider whether to accept invitations from my extended family to join facebook.
so i did a search and found this article as well as the article entitled “islambook.”
i rejected facebook a few years ago, alhamdolillah. but my zeal was driven primarily by the sincere belief that i could best protect my Iman by rejecting any evil and every doubtful influence. and that same zeal put a huge strain on my relations with my parents, my near relatives, my far relatives, my neighbors, and my past friends — because all of them enjoy fully the very sources i was labeling “at best dubious.”
the thaw for me began when i attended the sentencing of a Muslim brother who was prosecuted unjustly, and i realized that my very strict position had kept me from being able to help him in any meaningful way. and still it was only this summer, alhamdolillah, that Shaykh Yasir took me aside and gave me 20-30 odd minutes of much-needed and inshaAllah appreciated naseeha.
reading these two articles and all of the comments, my gut reaction is that all “social networking sites” should only be tools. and every tool has a purpose, and should be used with purpose, too.
so, i subscribe to MM, and am a part of this community — because this site educates me in a practical way, and this site promotes what is good and speaks out against what is evil. and i need an outlet for that because the local masajid are often too cowed to do so.
and, i subscribe to Digg to advance the visibility of good i find here at MM, and inshaAllah, in other venues.
and, i subscribe to geni.com to sustain the ties of kinship with distant relatives. my family tree there, mashaAllah, has grown to over 1,100 direct relations, and some 11,000 including relations by marriage. all in one year! and i wish some of my relatives were more circumspect in their posts on that site, but in general most are, and at least i know when i post there what my relationship is to someone who writes me.
similarly, i think anyone using a social networking site needs a purpose — a good one — and needs to be diligent in renewing that niyat.
that said, i have been interested in starting a new social networking site — very purpose driven — and inshaAllah of practical benefit too. but i lack the computer-savvy and expertise. so if someone here is interested in working with me, let me know. and may Allah put good in our networks and in our interactions, for all of us.
bismillah. did anyone else have the same reaction i did to the title of this article?
when Allah subhanahu wata ala uses the words, “wa maa adhraka…” isn’t He always discussing something that belongs to Him?
Sometimes it is a blessing, at-Tariq, the star that pierces darkness, as Allah’s Truth drives back ignorance and falsehood, as submission to Allah and the hope one finds therein will drive back despair, and so much more.
and sometimes Allah uses the phrase to warn us, as He warns us of al-Qaria, the striking Calamity, the Last Day of this dunya, may Allah protect us from witnessing that trial.
but i do not recall — and i am no scholar, so i ask in sincere humility — i do not recall any time when the phrase was used for something… well, for something like facebook.
wa ma adraka ma “facebook”…..?!?!can you title it this way..is it allowed??…please check it out with an Aa’lim…its from the Quran…it’s “kalaam-u-Allah”!!!!…Please respect it’s words
(i know this is quite an old article but yet the fact of using the “quranic words” in such a way is disturbing)
Oh ALLAH Subahana Wa’ Ta’ala, Save us from the fitna of dajjal. Ameen
Shaytan hitting us hard from so many ways. Dajjal system slowly coming into place with fitna as a standard everywhere you go. Be careful my brothers and sisters! This life is as long as a blink of an eyelid compared to the next life. Insha’Allah we will be in jannat-al-firdous together. We can have a facebook then!!! We can take photos, post them anywhere we like!
very nice article but missing the very point as the title says it “And what will explain to you what the” face book is when Quran talks about alcohol and gambling Quran says it that it has some benefits but it has more harms then benefits so don’t even go near those things and i think its the same case with all those sites. There is one thing called following shaytan and there is another thing called following the footsteps of shaytan and i think its following the footsteps of shaytan and i don’t think we really have to have these things in life to live there was a time when we lived without it and we still can just my opinion.
thanks
ibnabeeomar
January 2, 2008 at 12:28 PM
http://www.phatwafactory.com/product_info.php?products_id=39
Abdul.
January 2, 2008 at 12:52 PM
Good article, definitely needed to be said!
mcpagal
January 2, 2008 at 5:16 PM
Funnily enough there’s a facebook group called ‘Brothers and Sisters against shady opposite gender relations’ (or something like that) that deal with pretty much the same issues.
My advice is not to add/accept anyone as a friend that you don’t know, and to set any necessary randomers to limited profile. For privacy and because putting people on limited profile is a little power trip in itself, muahaha
Abu Bakr
January 2, 2008 at 5:33 PM
boycott facebook…
my two cents : )
Shirien
January 2, 2008 at 6:03 PM
I also held the opinion above (i really hate facebook and all those things) but I have to admit It’s good for marketing and getting the word out for your events. My account is strictly for marketing “Tufaan” (www.tufaanmovie.com)
Completely agree though, mashaAllah.
zfnd
January 2, 2008 at 7:34 PM
nice halaqa topic: “cyber-dunya safety”
restingtraveller
January 2, 2008 at 7:42 PM
I refuse to have a facebook acct; i’m known as ‘anti-facebook’ or ‘the no-facebook loner’.
I’m probably the only one of my friends who doesn’t have one, and don’t plan on ever having one inshaAllah.
and I just see the absolute waste of time that site is IF you’re not sincerely using it for da’wah or promoting islamic events…other than that, I feel like it’s just looking at other people’s pictures and writing on a board (or wall, whatever it is).
I know people who have had fights on there, and they would completely embarass themselves because of what they write which would be open to everyone else and the pictures they put up somehow ‘leak’ to other people…the stories go on..
Also, I really don’t think sisters at all should be putting their pictures up, hijaab or no hijaab…I don’t think it’s appropriate because I think it’s removing her haya, any brother can go on there and look at her display picture (it was explained to me that only your ‘friends’ can see your pictures..)..this is my personal opinion. As you mentioned, people do things on there they wouldn’t do in public..so as sisters, I don’t think we should be posing and such if we would not do it in public…
my .02, wa Allahu ‘alam.
(lol at the title…wa ma adraaka ma facebook. nice.)
Anony
January 2, 2008 at 8:23 PM
subhanllah, i nearly fell of my bed when i read the title
Akhi W
January 2, 2008 at 9:41 PM
You should change the title pic with the picture from the first comment….lol
I don’t have fasadbook or mysbace or any of that, its a waste of time….InshAllah I wont have one either
zaynab
January 2, 2008 at 10:21 PM
“In and of themselves, they’re not all that bad. What people do on them, however, is something else entirely. They can be, and are, used as sources of benefit: being able to keep in touch with distant friends and family, meeting like-minded people who can help you with projects and petitions, and more. There is, however, a much shadier side to it all.”
Thanks for saying that, it’s always important to stay balanced.
I was a crazy Facebook hater initially…then I started using it to promote community events. It’s an awesome way to reach out to young people who would otherwise be really tough to reach. And also for people who are just not too connected to the Muslim community, they may not mingle too much in person but everyone and their mamma is on Facebook nowadays. So there are definitely pro’s as well as the obvious con’s.
Like EVERYTHING else in life, it’s a matter of personal responsibility.
The answer is not to run scared or boycott things, it’s to educate ourselves. We can’t boycott every technological advancement or social situation that requires us to make a responsible decision…we just need to learn to be responsible.
Allahu alam.
AnonyMouse
January 3, 2008 at 1:08 AM
I admit that I do have an FB account, but I’ve made a point of 1) restricting it to sisters, 2) keeping to people I know personally and/ or really trust, and 3) no personal pictures.
fastaqim.blogspot.com
January 3, 2008 at 2:53 AM
jazakallah khair for the advice
inexplicabletimelessness
January 3, 2008 at 4:22 AM
jazaki Allah khair sister AnonyMouse. advice appreciated. : )
I also like your approach sister Zaynab because FB, among other things, if used properly, may be a positive way of staying in touch with our younger Muslims or techy-type crowd.
But, first a reminder to myself before anyone else: everything should be done with moderation and good intentions.
Allah knows best
Abu Yasmeen
January 3, 2008 at 8:28 AM
I agree w/ you. I hardly ever open my facebook account or browse too many women who aren’t covered right, and MySpace just scares me. One day we will have niqaab book…lol.
Alex
January 3, 2008 at 9:41 AM
My sheikh was asked recently about Facebook, Myspace and the like.
His response:
“La hawla wala quwata illa billah.
This is question of one’s nafs. Advertising one’s self ‘Here I am. Look at how important I am.’ etc.”
He then continued
“In addition to the 20 odd ahadith about the impermissible nature of pictures. It is haram for women to look at men unless it is a mahram of theirs.” And he quoted the sahih hadith of the 2 women with the blind man. And then some of the many hadith that prove that it is haram for a man to look at a woman.
“So both are haram. The only exceptions are for instruction/teaching” He quoted the hadith where the Prophet SalAllahu alaihi wasallam, taught the women without telling them to look away.
“Or for medical reasons or to identify someone in court.
So on what basis are you sticking your face up on there, where people from the opposite sex can see?… Get your pictures off of it. Get your names off of it.”
“It’s not a need. Our need is for wiliaya, for being close to Allah, so don’t sell yourself short.
Socialize the rest of life and die the same way you lived, in ignorance of the Divine? No realization, no travel to Allah- but I had a good time? Make a tawba and give it up.”
Abu Bakr
January 3, 2008 at 10:39 AM
Sr. Zaynab, my comment made was intended to be tongue-in-cheek…
The reality is that the youth are using it, nothing we do will change that. We can discourage them (which will work with a minority) but those who have suggested that it be used to reach out to those who are already there have a point.
However, that notwithstanding, most of our youth are not doing anything productive with their presence on Facebook. By reaching out to them for events, we will affect some, but the reality is that for most it will change nothing.
But then again, I’m not the biggest fan of the internet either. It is a powerful tool for dissemination of information and it has tremendous potential be used for good, but ends up being used for alot of what is either evil or just plain waste of time.
I find it disturbing that for many young people, the internet, chat rooms, MSN Messenger, Paltalk, etc. seem to have taken the place of having real lives and personal contacts.
Ruth Nasrullah
January 3, 2008 at 10:49 AM
It’s haram for women to look at men and men to look at women?
??????
Safiyyah
January 3, 2008 at 11:10 AM
Salam – I was addicted to FB and ended up prying on so many of my friends Astaghfirullah! It took over my work i was on there 24/7 – sometimes not even doing anyting just staring at it. Writing silly update messages and just doing things that let’s say won’t help u get to Jannah. I then thought last month “why am i doing this? Have i gained anything? did i learn anything?” in actual fact i experienced a lot of free-mixing going on and it hurt me! So i came off! and i have more time for work, dawah and Deen study. FEELS GREAT and even better now i know im not being watched…or am I????
ibnabeeomar
January 3, 2008 at 11:49 AM
i think alex’s post was referring to looking unnecessarily at pictures of each other, not looking in general
Hidayah
January 3, 2008 at 12:00 PM
i have facebook account but
– i am friends only with ppl i know personally
– Only have female friends (and my brother) have no other male listed as friends even if they are my co-workers, i just ignore their request
– No pictures what so ever…..and only facebook to leave mssgs for friends instead of calling (saves time and prevents u from backbiting =)
Alex
January 3, 2008 at 12:02 PM
Yes.
Sheikh Yusuf Al-Qaradawi, (who is by no means an ultra-conservative) states:
What Islam prohibits in the sphere of sex includes looking at a member of the opposite sex with desire; for the eye is the key to the feelings, and the look is a messenger of desire, carrying the message of fornication or adultery.
This is why Allah Almighty has commanded the believing men and the believing women alike to lower their gazes together with His command to guard their sexual parts: (Tell the believing men that they should lower their gazes and guard their sexual organs; that is purer for them. Indeed, Allah is well-acquainted with what they do. And tell the believing women that they should lower their gazes and guard their sexual organs, and not display their adornment, except that which is apparent of it; and that they should draw their head-coverings over their bosoms, and not display their adornment except to their husbands or their fathers or their husbands’ fathers, or their sons or their husbands’ sons, or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons, or their women, or those whom their right hands possess, or male servants who lack sexual desire, or children who are not aware of women’s nakedness; and that they should not strike their feet in order to make known what they hide of their adornment.) (An-Nur 24: 30-31)
Several divine injunctions are contained in these two verses. Two of them pertain to both men and women, namely, the lowering of the gaze and the guarding of the sexual organs, while the rest are addressed exclusively to women.
A difference is to be noted here between the expressions, ‘lower their gazes’ and ‘guard their sexual organs,’ signifying that while the sexual organs must be totally guarded without any leeway, the lowering of the gaze is only partial, because necessity and the general interest of the people require that some looking at members of the opposite sex be allowed.
‘Lowering the gazes’ does not mean that in the presence of the opposite sex the eyes should be shut or that the head should be bowed toward the ground, since this would be impossible; in another place the Qur’an says, ‘Lower your voice’ (Luqman 31: 19), which does not mean sealing the lips. Here, ‘lowering of the gazes’ means to avert one’s gaze from the faces of the passers-by and not to caress the attractive features of the members of the opposite sex with one’s eyes. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) told `All ibn Abi Talib, ‘Ali, do not let a second look follow the first. The first look is allowed to you but not the second.’ (Reported by Ahmad, Abu Dawud, and at-Tirmidhi)
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) considered hungry and lustful looks at a person of the opposite sex as ‘the zina (adultery or fornication) of the eye,’ according to his saying, ‘The eyes also commit zina, and their zina is the lustful look.” (Reported by al-Bukhari)
He termed the lustful look zina because it gives sexual pleasure and gratification in an unlawful way. This is also what Jesus (peace and blessings be upon him) is reported to have said in the Gospel of Matthew: You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery’. But I say to you that everyone who so much as looks at woman with evil desire for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. (Matt. 5:2728)
Indeed, such hungry and lustful looks are not merely a danger to chastity but they also result in agitation of the mind and disturbed thoughts.
End Sh. Qaradawi’s fatwa.
A definition of desire is useful here-
in Radd al-Muhtar `ala al-Durr al-Mukhtar the famous commentary on Fatawa-e-Alamgiri (also known as Fatawa Hindiyah) desire is defined as any physical inclination of the heart.
The ulema further state that:
It is not a condition that it be strong physical desire, or that it be accompanied by sexual thoughts or physical arousal.
Lack of desire is that one looks towards them as one would towards one’s child or towards a beautiful tree.
End Radd al Muhtar & commentary
So, given the above, yes looking at the opposite sex is haram, unless one is confident that such looking will arouse nothing more than looking at one’s own child does.
In the context of placing one’s pictures online, this is impossible to guarantee and in fact the opposite is likely.
Angie
January 3, 2008 at 12:27 PM
facebook ruins reputations and whatever good comes out of it, the bad is much worse.
wa Allahu a`lam
zaynab
January 3, 2008 at 1:50 PM
Br. Abu Bakr: The smiley gave me the impression that you were being a bit tongue-in-cheek, I wasn’t really directing my comments to you. Sorry if it seemed like I was attacking you.
I completely understand the issues with Facebook/MySpace/etc, and I’ve seen a lot of what you are all worried about (pple acting inappropriately, flirting, etc.).
I’m just saying: the problem is bigger than a website. It’s silly to think that banning Muslim kids from this kind of thing is going to make them behave. If the root of the problem isn’t addressed it’ll just manifest itself in different ways.
And we have to be balanced! If you approach a kid who’s doing bad things online and tell them the internet is haram they’ll laugh in your face and continue what they’re doing. These things are not in-and-of-themselves haram, it’s what pple use them for. So why not just teach pple how to use them responsibly.
All the negative arguments could be made against blogs too, but here we are :)
I’m just trying to bring up the other side of the argument. And Allah knows best.
ibnabeeomar
January 3, 2008 at 1:54 PM
i kind of favor a different approach, and its related to the youth outreach series i posted up. when giving a khutbah on that topic (i did it at the end of the summer before school was in session) i mentioned how clueless some parents are, and that they need to go and visit their kids myspace pages, and see the pictures they have put up of themselves .. the expressions on the faces of the kids was priceless.
do facebook/myspace, but for kids even in high school, i think there needs to be some level of parental supervision. that is often enough to keep things in check. but most of the time, its kids w/computers in their own rooms, and parents have absolutely ZERO idea of their kids online lives.
Abu Bakr
January 3, 2008 at 2:48 PM
No worry, Sr. Zaynab, I just wanted to make sure that was clear
I’m honestly not a big fan of blogs either : )
while this is said tongue-in-cheek, I actually mean it, I’m not a big fan of the internet; the fact of the matter is, for better or worse, we’re stuck with it and we might as well make the most of it by the following means:
(1) putting up useful content
(2) parental supervision
(3) self-discipline
and if enough of 2 and/or 3 are not present, then it must simply be avoided.
Al-Karachwi
January 3, 2008 at 4:49 PM
Bismillah ArRahman ArRaheem
Call me old hat, but I favor the approach of the sheikh whose fatwa Alex quoted above: Those who are responsible for making Dawah should not leave it unclear that something is clearly harmful.
The way some people seek excuses these days for indulging in various things inappropraite, if they were to hear a scholar take a soft, nuanced approach towards Facebook (or for that matter TV, the much more pervasive fitna of our era) it would translate in their mind–unfortunately–to a conditional approval of the said action.
While taking a “hard line” will not affect some people (for reasons outlined in many of the above responses), there appears (wallahu a’lam) a need for a few scholars to be blunt (analogy: apples) and just give the fatwa in unequivocal language, and another set of scholars, Daees rather than Muftis, to make the bitter truth palatable and digestible (analogy: donuts) to those steeped in the habits or things being advised against.
AnonyMouse
January 4, 2008 at 2:33 AM
How sadly ironic… no sooner has this been posted, but I discover, through Facebook, that someone close to me is involved in something she shouldn’t be.
*Sighs*
Once more I reiterate: Parents, keep an eye out on your kid’s online activities! Especially if they’re under the age of 14!
Dawud Israel
January 4, 2008 at 8:31 PM
Join the QuranJam.com Facebook group: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=6436014181
:)
Dawah through Internets!
Abu Bakr
January 4, 2008 at 11:27 PM
Let’s bump that up to “Under the age of 30” : )
Zainab
January 5, 2008 at 1:15 AM
FB can be really haraam, or perfectly okay. It’s upto you to not compromise your hayaah online. especially online. Its so much to do more Haraam.
However, i really have to say that facebook has been an EXCELLENT tool in educating people about, advocating for and inviting people to events that that many people could never have known about.
mcpagal
January 5, 2008 at 9:40 AM
^I agree!^
Like everything else, it’s how you use it. You can use your TV to keep up to date with the news, or to watch dirt. You can use your mobile to keep in touch with friends and family, or to chat/text to the opposite sex unnecessarily. You can use Facebook to keep in touch and keep informed of events, or for the wrong kind of socialisation.
It all comes down to the individual, not the instrument.
MR
January 7, 2008 at 12:50 AM
I love facebook! It helps me promote MR, Halal Tube, Sports Halaqah and other projects. It also keeps me up to date with the latest Islamic events and I can spam 100s of Muslims links.
Facebook actually doesn’t like me. They send me warning messages for spamming people and “abusing” my power through facebook.
If you really tech savvy and a super nerd marketer you can really abuse facebook and get tons of hits to your site.
Other than that, it’s crap.
Amad
January 7, 2008 at 7:31 AM
As a blogger, fb does provide a massive marketing opportunity as MR suggests. Also, I have been able to locate all friends via fb. Ultimately though, it provides another opportunity to waste time, as if we don’t have enough!
Use iT only if u don’t abuse it!
restingtraveller
January 7, 2008 at 8:38 AM
Can’t you just use e-mail? What the difference? (not asking in a harsh way..just a bit confused!)
alooch
January 7, 2008 at 9:00 AM
Bismillaah-hirRahmaan-nirRaheem.
please join the facebook group “I don’t go on dates, I just eat ’em.”
Maybe that will pave the way for the proper use of facebook (or u might end up looking for a wife from the members of that group haha)
The fact is that we all know exactly why we log onto facebook(why does the heartrate suddenly increase when u scan the homepage for new notifications or inbox messages? lol….)
Sometimes though, we might log on for a noble purpose and then we look to the left side of the facebook page and see that terribly dressed woman…y3ni that was unintentional but it must be avoided. (btw me n my friend are trying to come up with a facebook app that disables all photos…lool..anyone down?)
may Allah swt keep all our hearts firm upon the path most beloved to Him swt and protect us all and keep us all away from everything He dislikes. Ameen.
P.S i was an addict myself, but for a couple of months i have been trying a new strategy…try it and lemme know if it works. Think about something as simple as THIS: would you like to die while wasting time on facebook? or while cutting short your facebookings and closing your eyes and reciting the kalima JUST for the sole pleasure of Allah swt (while no one is watching you except Allah swt)?
please let us know if this works….or share what works for u. Imagine the ajr you can get bi idhnillah if you get someone to make dhikr instead of excessive facebooking.
Allahu Akbar!!!
(for my punjabi folk, facebook changa vakht paya vey saarey musalmanaan nu, siapa jeya bera gharq hovey edda)
Yusuf
January 8, 2008 at 12:09 AM
Subhan’ALLAH. I totaly agree witht the post. Its a tool that was made to get youngsters on there and enable them to open the doors of fitan. Although its a bad tool, its really good to keep in touch with friends who sometimes don’t answer their phones/emails. I suggest to eliminate all the sisters because thats how fitan start and to keep close friends and people you know on there, just like the rest said here mash’allah.
Jazakoum allah khair.
mcpagal
January 8, 2008 at 12:46 PM
“I suggest to eliminate all the sisters because thats how fitan [sic] start”
Uh, sure.
alooch
January 8, 2008 at 1:22 PM
“I suggest to eliminate all the sisters because thats how fitan [sic] start”
even though its true sisters shudnt pose with their annoying kissing face or however, the bros shudnt look at the sisters in the first place…its a mutual responsibility
may Allah swt protect us all from this mini dajjal so many muslim youth have been influenced by
Amad
January 8, 2008 at 4:18 PM
Alooch, I enjoyed the punjabi post-script!
AnonyMouse
January 8, 2008 at 4:25 PM
Mcpagal, I think he meant to eliminate sisters from their (brothers’) “friends” list – and vice versa.
alooch
January 11, 2008 at 12:17 PM
Amad: thx. punjabis represent
AbuAbdAllah, the Houstonian
October 16, 2008 at 7:19 PM
innalhamdolillah. bismillah. mashaAllah, MM rocks. :) having been persuaded to join Digg to promote articles on MM, i had begun to consider whether to accept invitations from my extended family to join facebook.
so i did a search and found this article as well as the article entitled “islambook.”
i rejected facebook a few years ago, alhamdolillah. but my zeal was driven primarily by the sincere belief that i could best protect my Iman by rejecting any evil and every doubtful influence. and that same zeal put a huge strain on my relations with my parents, my near relatives, my far relatives, my neighbors, and my past friends — because all of them enjoy fully the very sources i was labeling “at best dubious.”
the thaw for me began when i attended the sentencing of a Muslim brother who was prosecuted unjustly, and i realized that my very strict position had kept me from being able to help him in any meaningful way. and still it was only this summer, alhamdolillah, that Shaykh Yasir took me aside and gave me 20-30 odd minutes of much-needed and inshaAllah appreciated naseeha.
reading these two articles and all of the comments, my gut reaction is that all “social networking sites” should only be tools. and every tool has a purpose, and should be used with purpose, too.
so, i subscribe to MM, and am a part of this community — because this site educates me in a practical way, and this site promotes what is good and speaks out against what is evil. and i need an outlet for that because the local masajid are often too cowed to do so.
and, i subscribe to Digg to advance the visibility of good i find here at MM, and inshaAllah, in other venues.
and, i subscribe to geni.com to sustain the ties of kinship with distant relatives. my family tree there, mashaAllah, has grown to over 1,100 direct relations, and some 11,000 including relations by marriage. all in one year! and i wish some of my relatives were more circumspect in their posts on that site, but in general most are, and at least i know when i post there what my relationship is to someone who writes me.
similarly, i think anyone using a social networking site needs a purpose — a good one — and needs to be diligent in renewing that niyat.
that said, i have been interested in starting a new social networking site — very purpose driven — and inshaAllah of practical benefit too. but i lack the computer-savvy and expertise. so if someone here is interested in working with me, let me know. and may Allah put good in our networks and in our interactions, for all of us.
AbuAbdAllah, the Houstonian
October 16, 2008 at 7:31 PM
bismillah. did anyone else have the same reaction i did to the title of this article?
when Allah subhanahu wata ala uses the words, “wa maa adhraka…” isn’t He always discussing something that belongs to Him?
Sometimes it is a blessing, at-Tariq, the star that pierces darkness, as Allah’s Truth drives back ignorance and falsehood, as submission to Allah and the hope one finds therein will drive back despair, and so much more.
and sometimes Allah uses the phrase to warn us, as He warns us of al-Qaria, the striking Calamity, the Last Day of this dunya, may Allah protect us from witnessing that trial.
but i do not recall — and i am no scholar, so i ask in sincere humility — i do not recall any time when the phrase was used for something… well, for something like facebook.
ayesha
January 12, 2010 at 1:11 AM
wa ma adraka ma “facebook”…..?!?!can you title it this way..is it allowed??…please check it out with an Aa’lim…its from the Quran…it’s “kalaam-u-Allah”!!!!…Please respect it’s words
(i know this is quite an old article but yet the fact of using the “quranic words” in such a way is disturbing)
-MA-
November 3, 2008 at 7:06 PM
Oh ALLAH Subahana Wa’ Ta’ala, Save us from the fitna of dajjal. Ameen
Shaytan hitting us hard from so many ways. Dajjal system slowly coming into place with fitna as a standard everywhere you go. Be careful my brothers and sisters! This life is as long as a blink of an eyelid compared to the next life. Insha’Allah we will be in jannat-al-firdous together. We can have a facebook then!!! We can take photos, post them anywhere we like!
Please watch this till the end.
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=wogtTQs8Kzw
In the video, in the end it will show a logo that contains the eye of the dajjal! Once again, be careful!
fadi
April 8, 2010 at 2:09 AM
Asallam-u-alikum
very nice article but missing the very point as the title says it “And what will explain to you what the” face book is when Quran talks about alcohol and gambling Quran says it that it has some benefits but it has more harms then benefits so don’t even go near those things and i think its the same case with all those sites. There is one thing called following shaytan and there is another thing called following the footsteps of shaytan and i think its following the footsteps of shaytan and i don’t think we really have to have these things in life to live there was a time when we lived without it and we still can just my opinion.
thanks
Asallam-u-alikum