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Dawah and Interfaith

Of Wa-Hubbies and Conspiracies

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Coca Cola Conspiracy

If you can read Arabic, you know the person who wrote this does not understand Arabic

There seems to be an obsession with conspiracy theories among young Muslims these days. For some strange reason, Muslims seem to look for secret messages in almost everything. From cartoons to people’s names, nothing is innocent and all seem to be part of a secret plot of some underworld organization.

From an Islamic perspective, it is not proper for Muslims to dwell on conspiracy theories. Islam teaches us to focus our efforts on Ilm-Naafi – knowledge that benefits us and not to get involved in Laghw – useless discussions. For the most part, conspiracy theories are useless discussions in which we cannot prove the conspiracy to be true or not, and even if you can, the information gained can seldom help you gain closeness to Allah or benefit you in anyway. Conspiracy theories in general fall into the category of Laghw and waste precious time that could be spent in more beneficial activities.

I have identified a few reasons why Muslims seem to be obsessed with conspiracy theories:

1. To find somebody else to blame for our mistakes:

Some Muslims don’t want to accept the fact that we are in the situation we are in because of our disobedience of Allah or deviation from the straight path. Such Muslims tend to look for a scapegoat to blame for their mistakes, and conspiracy theories provide enough of these. If you look at the people who tend to be obsessed with conspiracy theories, many of them are generally not knowledgable or practicing Muslims. It is not uncommon to find Muslims discussing how the Jews or Illuminati are the cause of all their problems and miss a salah due to the discussion.

Solution: The Qur’an does not teach us to blame others for our problems. It teaches us to strive to please Allah and then He will assist us in solving our problems. It would be better to utilize our time to watch Islamic lectures instead of a conspiracy documentary, and to pray and strive to implement our knowledge than to sit around discussing who was behind an earthquake or flood and how they caused it.

2. Boredom, not utilizing time properly

Many Muslims try to find ways to kill time, as if time needs killing. You’d think with all the problems in our lives, our own sins and weaknesses, we’d have a lot more important things to do than kill time. Sadly, many Muslims suffer from boredom and thus browse YouTube for something to kill time. It is during these moments in which they wanted to kill ten minutes that they discover a conspiracy theory video which ends up eating up hours and sometimes days of their lives as they watch, rewatch, discuss and obsess over it.

Solution: Utilize your time properly and wisely. There is so much that we need to do that we really should not have time to kill. If you are bored and decide to surf YouTube, then it would be better to spend your time watching Islamic lectures or if you need to relax, a nasheed video. Just don’t give Shaytaan a chance to trap you into an obsession that can waste hours of precious time.

3. Lack of understanding of the religion

Some Muslims are sincere and trying to practice their religion, but due to ignorance, they mistake conspiracy theory videos for Islamic videos. I often find Islamic DVD stalls stocked with almost only conspiracy theory videos, most of them by Non-Muslims too. This shows a lack of understanding as to what is Islamic knowledge and also what is beneficial knowledge.

Solution: Consult scholars and learn from them what constitutes beneficial knowledge. Oh, and make sure the Islamic DVDs you buy are really Islamic.

I am sure there are many other reasons why Muslims love conspiracy theories, maybe someone else can help me understand this obsession.

Some of these conspiracy theories can be very funny. Take a look at the following examples:

1. Coca Cola backwards is ‘Laa Muhammad, Laa Makkah’ which means ‘No Muhamammad, No Makkah’.

This one circulates a lot via email and it seems that many Muslims seem to believe it (why else would they forward the email), yet it is extremely illogical. Why would someone when naming a soft drink, try and decide what is ‘No Muhammad, No Makkah’ backwards with the backwards word being Arabic and the forward word being English? Furthermore, even if you squint and twist the letters, you still can’t see it. The closest you get is maybe ‘Lee Muhammad, Lee Makkah’, meaning ‘for Muhammad, For Makkah’, which makes me wonder why conspiracy theories are never pro-Muslim or positive?

Looking at words backwards to find secret messages can be very dangerous as then one can find hidden messages in good words like god and live. In fact, one can even deduce that Godzilla is a Muslim’s pet as Godzilla backwards is Alliz dog.

2. Zakumi is named after a tree in Hell

Before the World Cup occurred, I heard during a Jumu’ah lecture that one of the reasons the World Cup is haraam is because its mascot is named after a tree in Hellfire, Shajaratuz-Zaqqum. Firstly, Zaqqum and Zakumi are not the same word. Secondly, nobody names their mascot after a tree in Hell in any language; I doubt the people who named him even know Arabic or what Zaqqum is. Finally, Zakumi means SA2010, that is all it means, No hidden messages, no hidden agendas, except to sell more World Cup merchandise.

3. Pokemon means Poke Imaan

Firstly, Pokemon means pocket monsters. Secondly, what does poke Imaan mean? Is it a good thing or a bad thing? And finally, how do you poke Imaan if it does not have a Facebook account?

Can splitting a name really expose hidden messages? If thats the case, let us look at the word Wahhabi and I’ll show you how easy it is to invent a conspiracy theory and get caught up in it. Note the following is fictional humor:

Wahhabi is actually two words Wa and Hubby, Wa is the Arabic for ‘and’ while hubby is English slang for husband, so wahhabies actually means ‘and husbands’ this is because the Wahabbi movement is actually a cover for polygamous Muslim men wanting to take multiple wives. This also explains why many Westerners dislike wa-hubbies, because they are anti-polygamy!

So what do we learn from this? Lets not waste our lives looking at words backwards, or splitting names to find secret messages. Let us focus our brain power on learning, understanding and implementing Islam our lives. This will be more beneficial for us in this world and the Afterlife.

Shaykh Ismail Kamdar is the Books PO at Yaqeen Institute for Islamic Research. He is also the founder of Islamic Self Help and Izzah Academy. He completed the Alimiyyah Program in 2006, and a BA in Islamic Studies in 2014, specializing in Fiqh, Tafsir, and History. He is the author of over a dozen books in the fields of Islamic Studies and personal development.

96 Comments

96 Comments

  1. Cartoon M

    March 23, 2011 at 12:28 AM

    “3. Pokemon means Poke Imaan”

    Is this really a conspiracy theory? Tell me who believes this and I will gladly take their pokemon cards off their hands.

    • Ismail Kamdar

      March 23, 2011 at 1:15 AM

      This was common in my area when I was a teenager. The Moulana in our area started it because he felt Pokemon was evil and needed a reason to make people stop watching it.

      Thus, this became the common reason given by people in our area who were against it, which did not make any sense to me even though I never liked Pokemon :)

    • Arif Kabir

      March 23, 2011 at 1:32 PM

      Oh, it’s real all right. Sh. Al-Munajjad had to issue a Fatwa to set the record straight :)
      http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/21179/pokemon

      • Cartoon M

        March 23, 2011 at 2:20 PM

        Good thing our scholars cleared that one up. My childhood would have been empty if this rumor spread lol

      • Ismail Kamdar

        March 23, 2011 at 4:06 PM

        Did we really need a fatwa on this? Seriously!

      • Zaynab

        March 24, 2011 at 11:57 PM

        +1

        this is so funny and so crushingly pathetic for our community.

        Allahul Musta’an

  2. Rafa

    March 23, 2011 at 12:56 AM

    Humorous conspiracies, but it’s quite unfortunate to find that so many people will easily believe in them.
    I have to wonder though, at the nitpickers that actually go out of their way to find this stuff. I mean, Poke Imaan? Really? I used to love that show as a kid, and Subhanallah, if my Imaan was ever ‘poked’ it sure wasn’t because of that.

    • Ismail Kamdar

      March 23, 2011 at 4:08 PM

      We also haven’t come to Ijma yet as to whether poking is a good or bad thing, so maybe poking your Iman might be good for you.

    • Abdus Sabur

      March 25, 2011 at 1:46 PM

      I worked with a woman who’s grandfather designed the coca-cola logo. There is no hidden message there. Anyone who knows anything about design can see this.

      Now, the dollar bill is another whole story……look up Last Poets – E Pluribus Unum http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XY1gtyzxAGw

      (it’s Halal …only percussion and vocals: Jalal Mansur Nurridin)

  3. Abu Hamzah

    March 23, 2011 at 4:25 AM

    I agree that a lot of these conspiracy theories are garbage. For exmaple, in New York the Apple store is underground and the entrance is a big glass cube. I have heard Muslims say that they did this to insult Muslims. Or even take Nike with Air Allah shoes. It clearly reads air. However….. there are some so-called conspiracy theories that make more sense than that of the official story: September 11.

  4. shoaib

    March 23, 2011 at 6:28 AM

    MASHAALLAH, these things are pretty common here, infact even i believd the la muhammad la makkah thng to be true.. But all thanks to ALLAH(s.w.t) 4 making me aware of this absurd theory

  5. ghabe

    March 23, 2011 at 6:31 AM

    sihtekilI – I like this

  6. Dreamlife

    March 23, 2011 at 7:53 AM

    You might like this :)

    http://maniacmuslim.com/?p=959

  7. iMuslim

    March 23, 2011 at 8:43 AM

    Poke Imaan… that’s hilarious! May Allah help us. Sometimes we do get carried away. :)

  8. Amad

    March 23, 2011 at 9:14 AM

    There’s another one on youtube… where it shows the mosque’s minaret in Madinah being replicated by a cloud above (you have to really stare hard at the clouds, and sometimes you’ll see a lion too if you try), and then a lightning strike in slow motion writes the kalima in the sky.

    It was more hilarious since my cousin put it up so i had a good opp to have fun with him :)

    I’ll have to find that one!

  9. Mezba

    March 23, 2011 at 10:10 AM

    Usually in my experience the most ardent believers of conspiracy theories tend to be “hardcore Muslims” who are very anti-Western. I agree that you can find a conspiracy in anything. The worst are those that believe in Jews being root of all evil and still believe in the elders of Zion – terrible stuff! If they hate the West so much why don’t they leave? If you look at islamqa website, any time they mention the Jews they call Allah’s curses on them – shameful!

    • b.e

      March 23, 2011 at 12:30 PM

      Zionism is a reality …but what do you mean by elders of Zion?

      • Khaled

        March 23, 2011 at 12:45 PM

        Its a book that has been/hasn’t been (depending on who you ask) discredited which is supposedly written by Jews which states that they are planning on taking over the world.

        If we go back to what the excellent article says, we really shouldn’t care whether this is true or not. Remember the hadeeth narrated by Abu Hurayra may Allah be pleased with him, that the Prophet (Blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “There will be tribulations during which one who sitting is better than one who is standing, and one who standing is better than one who is walking, and one who is walking is better than one who is running. He who exposes himself to them will be drawn to them and whoever find a refuge from them, let him seek protection therein.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (3601) and Muslim (2886).

        Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar (may Allah have mercy on him) said, commenting on the meaning of this hadeeth):

        The words “He who exposes himself to them” mean, the one who wants to find out about them and does not want to ignore them.

        “will be drawn to them” means: they will destroy him, because he will expose himself to destruction because of them.

        “whoever find a refuge from them” means a place where he may seek refuge from the evil (of these turmoils).

        “let him seek protection therein” means: let him withdraw to that place so that he may be safe from the evil of the turmoil.

    • Khaled

      March 23, 2011 at 12:40 PM

      Completely disagree, my experience has been a lot more with foreigners and non-practicing converts. As far as calling Allah’s curse on the Jews, thats a conspiracy theory?

    • R47

      February 13, 2018 at 3:41 AM

      No conspiracies are usually not discussed among practicing typical Muslims. The ideas presented in the article are jokes. The real conspiracies are happening all over the world there is no denying how devoid the Muslim world has become of anything influential spiritually or materially. So they did the coke symbol. And u idiots still drink it, along with dasaani fluoride water.
      U think by dismissing Pokemon, you can also sweep Palestine and Jerusalem under a rug. Pathetic excuse. Wake up!

  10. forever a student of Islam

    March 23, 2011 at 12:05 PM

    this is one of the best articles on setting Muslims and Islam in perspective. I really enjoyed reading it. jazkaAllah kul khair for writing it :) indeed, we waste too much of our precious time over garbage like this. one day we shall regret it deeply.

  11. Amman AA

    March 23, 2011 at 12:29 PM

    After reading this article, I felt ashamed of myself. Not because of these conspiracy theories, but how people are simply in denial. The world is against ISLAM! Everything that is in the media, let it be pokemon or american products are all there to put you off the straight path.

    Pokemon above all others is promoting a cartoon which is obviously haraarm. The content is about evolution and the animators are trying to create creatures that don’t exist i.e. trying to mimic Allah’s power. It it absolute shirk. And thats with all cartoons and comic books. (Power Rangers, Superman, etc.) It has been designed to corrupt our children’s minds with fantasy. Look at most of the american muslims…always fantasizing.

    Coca Cola and other American soft drinks are trying to take away bussiness from other Muslim companies. No one is going crazy over Muslim soft drinks or foods. Its a conspiracy that makes absolute sense. Fine, the “La Muhammad and La Mecca” is a stretch, but these companies are attacking Islam from within by taking away the market from Muslim companies. Look at Saudi Arabia…McDonalds and Starbucks in our land where no kaafir has the right settle in.

    This article is simply trying to say “Why would these people try to discredit Islam through hidden messages”. The world is against Islam. We should never underestimate what the kaafirs are up to.

    Its true that we shouldn’t waste our times with all of this but we shouldn’t keep ourselves in the dark about it either.

    May Allah set our affairs straight. We need to wake up…

    • Amad

      March 23, 2011 at 2:40 PM

      Are u for real bro or just taking us for a ride?

      • Amman AA

        March 23, 2011 at 5:44 PM

        Salaam brother…

        i am serious, have I said anything which is not plausible or outlandish?

        • forever a student of Islam

          March 24, 2011 at 10:56 AM

          I completely agree with what you said Amman. The way I see it, yes the whole world with most what is in it is set to put us off our imaan and away from Siratul Mustaqeem. We should not waste time on talking about conspiracy theories as this is “laghw” but in the same time we should be on our guard and knowledgeable about what these anti-islamists maybe thinking of doing.

    • Ismail Kamdar

      March 23, 2011 at 4:01 PM

      I knew I’d get a comment like this :D

    • Amad

      March 24, 2011 at 2:39 AM

      . Look at Saudi Arabia…McDonalds and Starbucks in our land where no kaafir has the right settle in.

      Yes, your comments are outlandish.

      Who gave us the right to decide where “kaafirs” can settle or not. In fact without the “kaafirs”, most of our Muslim countries, esp in the Middle East, would be still third-world countries. It is the “kaafir” technology that brought petroleum wealth to Saudi for example. Without Aramco, Saudi would be like Yemen.

      Conspiracy theories make us move our reliance from on our own action and leaving results to Allah, towards worrying about how everything is controlled.

      Don’t worry about McDonald and Starbucks. Worry about what you can do to contribute to society. Why don’t you start a “Muslim” starbucks and compete on quality and service.

      • forever a student of Islam

        March 24, 2011 at 11:01 AM

        ” Conspiracy theories make us move our reliance from on our own action and leaving results to Allah, towards worrying about how everything is controlled. ”

        I thought all results and state of affairs should be left for Allah…? We are only here to do what we can and what benefits us but the ultimate result is by Allah. We cannot decide anything on our own.

      • Concerned

        March 24, 2011 at 5:23 PM

        -Comment removed. This post is not about wala wal baraa and the “kuffaar”.

      • Junny

        March 25, 2011 at 8:17 PM

        In fact, about a year and a half ago, the price of American soft drinks in Saudi Arabia has risen from 1 to 1.50 riyals. The 0.50 is an inconvenience, and the American soft drinks have lost out to the locally produced soft drinks which cost 1 riyal. The American boycott of ’02 still has its committed boycotters. The likes of KFC are losing out to local fast food chains.

        I am someone who lived most of my life in KSA, and have recently returned from a visit.

    • Really

      March 24, 2011 at 11:35 AM

      AOA
      What about Clifford and Calliou ? They are ok ? Please tell me!!!

    • Unlce tom

      March 24, 2011 at 11:46 AM

      maybe, you should tell the saudi’s to stop eating so many burgers and sipping coke. That way the “kuffar” businesses will leave the pure muslim lands.

    • Bushra

      March 24, 2011 at 12:20 PM

      Troll.

  12. AnonyMouse

    March 23, 2011 at 1:03 PM

    Haha, this reminds me of the days when people used to email me the most absurd conspiracy theories and urban legends – once there was a mass email warning that corn flakes gives you cancer. I replied the mass email (which was sent out to about a billion people, and by someone who apparently didn’t know about BCCing) berating everyone’s lack of intelligence for believing idiocy without even bothering to check.

    Anyyyywayyyy… since I moved to the Arab world I’ve heard way more of these conspiracy theories. The most embarrassing thing is when a da’ee or someone who looks sheikh-like actually believes it and talks about it on TV… so far the most memorable one was about how the Jews and Shi’a have a conspiracy to take over the world, and Hillary Clinton was in on it.
    *Sigh*

    • Amad

      March 23, 2011 at 2:42 PM

      But Hilary isn’t jewish or Shia or is she doing taqiyya?? Hmm….

      • AnonyMouse

        March 24, 2011 at 3:41 AM

        Well, that’s the thing, innit… we don’t know whose side she’s really on… and that’s what we really need to be concerned about :O

    • F

      March 23, 2011 at 6:09 PM

      Yeah, I’ve also found the conspiracy theories to be rampant in the Muslim world. I usually attribute it to a lack of education and critical thinking.

      • Khaled

        March 23, 2011 at 6:12 PM

        No disrespect, but the conspiracy theorists say the same thing about the non-conspiracy theorists!

        I’m on the fence personally :)

  13. anonymous

    March 23, 2011 at 1:33 PM

    Don’t forget PEPSI stands for “Pay Every Penny Support Israel”….alhamdulillah I don’t drink soda, but if I did, I guess it’d be a hard-choice b/w Coke and Pepsi then…

    • Ismail Kamdar

      March 24, 2011 at 2:50 AM

      This really makes me wonder why conspiracy theories are never pro-Islam? Why didn’t anybody spread the rumor that PEPSI stands for “Pay Every Penny Support Islam!” :D

  14. LM

    March 23, 2011 at 2:52 PM

    “Wahhabi” has nothing to do with conspiracy theory, so I think your mentioning of it here is misplaced. The word describes Muslims who follow Muhammad ibn Abdal-Wahhab (or who think they do but actually don’t). Whether you agree with this description or not is up to you, but it cannot be called a “conspiracy” theory because the term describes the teachings of a particular person who actually lived — not in some imaginary planet but planet earth, which is a historical fact. Similarly, there are Hanafis, Shafis, Hanbalis, Malikis, Surooris, Ikhwanis, etc. None of them are conspiracy theories, I assure you, but terms that describe the teachings and ways of particular people, whether you agree with them or not.. ;-)

    Wassalam,
    LM

    • Khaled

      March 23, 2011 at 2:59 PM

      Salaam Alykum,

      It actually is because the term is not used by anyone who supposedly follows it nor does it refer to anything other than a political movement. Shaykh Muhammad ibn Abdel Wahhaab رحمه الله doesn’t have a particular school and no one thinks they are following him. As opposed to the Hanbali, Shaafi`ee, or Ahl al Hadeeth schools of thought, which the people who are accused of being “wahhaabi” usually follow.

      Hanbali=Real Madhhab
      Wahhaabi=Catch all term for what the person is using it hates about Islam.

      • LM

        March 23, 2011 at 3:14 PM

        Wassalam,

        Because people who follow a particular person don’t call themselves by a specific term but by other terms, doesn’t mean the unused term is a “conspiracy theory”. It is just a different term, that’s all. Putting it differently, if I call a follower of Einstein Einsteinien, it is not a conspiracy theory if the follower doesn’t describe himself or other followers of Einstein in that way. Also, the term “Wahhabi” doesn’t refer to a “political” movement but to a theological movement. Muhammad ibn Abdal Wahhab was actually mainly Hanbali in fiqh and this is well known. Though other Muslims had disagreements with him in fiqh, they mainly disagreed with him on matters of `aqeedah.

        Wassalam,
        LM

        • Ismail Kamdar

          March 23, 2011 at 4:03 PM

          I knew I’d get a comment like this despite writing the following line:

          “Note the following is fictional humor”

          But I did not expect it to turn into a fullblown discussion of Wahhabism!

          Personally, I prefer discussing Wa-hubbies instead. :D

        • Khaled

          March 23, 2011 at 4:16 PM

          as-Salaamu alykum,

          The followers of Muhammad bin Abd al-Wahhaab (as you like to call them) are Hanbali in aqeedah as well akhi. There is a group called the Hanbalis in aqeedah, and Muhammad bin Abd al-Wahhaab was hanbali in fiqh and aqeedah. Wahhaabi refers to a “boogyman” Muslim that everyone doesn’t like, i.e., Ahl as-Sunnah. How would you explain non-Saudis who don’t study his works (like the Jordanians and Egyptian salafis for example) being called Wahhaabi?

          • LM

            March 23, 2011 at 5:24 PM

            Wa alaikum assalaam,

            Sorry, I realize this isn’t the right place to have this discussion, and I thank Ismail for specifying that he meant it as fictional humor — a clear oversight by me. I’ll end by saying that I said Muhammad ibn Abdal-Wahhab was Hanbali in fiqh to counter your statement that “Shaykh Muhammad ibn Abdel Wahhaab رحمه الله doesn’t have a particular school”.

            Nice discussing. Wassalam,
            LM

          • Khaled

            March 23, 2011 at 5:30 PM

            Ya akhi, he doesn’t have a particular school named after him, he’s hanbali in fiqh and aqeedah, I already said that twice.

    • St1ngR

      March 24, 2011 at 1:17 AM

      Agree LM, why is the author only clarifying the Wahhabi or Salafi movement, all Muslims face stereotypes.

      • Ismail Kamdar

        March 24, 2011 at 2:52 AM

        What author and article is this referring to?

        I’m confused as this piece had nothing to do with clarifying Wahhabism or Salafism, it was a lighthearted article dealing with conspiracy theories.

  15. halima

    March 23, 2011 at 8:37 PM

    This article was on point! I’m tired of conspiracy theorists. We all need to seriously spend our time more usefully.

  16. Deema

    March 23, 2011 at 10:23 PM

    Very relevant topic that is not often discussed. Jazaakum Allahu khayran…and LOL @ “how do you poke Imaan if it does not have a Facebook account?”

  17. Olivia

    March 24, 2011 at 4:00 AM

    wow, Zaqqumi and Poke Imaan?

    laaaaaame.

  18. Muslimah.

    March 24, 2011 at 5:01 AM

    What happening to MM? Finding Islam in movies and now conspiracy theories….
    I miss the old MM articles…
    :(
    But hey…. that’s just me. :P
    :)

    • anonymous

      March 25, 2011 at 11:11 AM

      i’d like to see more of the old-school IbnAbeeOmar articles, they were my favorite.

  19. Saba

    March 24, 2011 at 9:16 AM

    Salam,

    Itz a useful article..MashaAllah.

    i hav personally witnessed ppl wastin deir precious tym in useless discussions such as dese conspiracy theories, etc. So , d article makes a lotta sense 2 me. Alhamdulillah.

    JazakAllahu khairan.

    :D

  20. Bilal

    March 24, 2011 at 11:43 AM

    Have you guys heard the one about why all Swiss watches (or maybe some other brand) always have the default time set to 10:10. This is because that was the year the MUSLIMS were DEFEATED (moors).

    Btw, to all these people complaining about muslims buying coke and pepsi over muslim drinks….really?
    There is no such thing as a MUSLIM DRINK !!
    just because a muslim person starts a cola company, doesn’t give the drink any magical Islamic properties.
    All soft drinks are bad for you, hence un-islamic in my scholarly opinion.

  21. Amatullah

    March 24, 2011 at 3:47 PM

    This was very funny, lol @ poke Iman and wa-hubbies.

  22. Abu Ibrahim

    March 24, 2011 at 5:18 PM

    JazakAllahu khayran, Asalamu Aleikoum Wa Rahmatolah wa Barakatoho

    Thank you so much for writing a much needed article! When I get conspiratorial emails and before I forward them, I always check with http://www.snopes.com

    Abu Ibrahim

  23. AM

    March 24, 2011 at 5:34 PM

    This article is clearly a deceptive trick by the Illuminati working in conjunction with the Freemasons to stop Muslims from searching for the truth.

    Look at the writer’s name ‘Ismail’. It has two i’s. And Illuminati begins with the letter ‘i’ and ends with ‘i’ !!

    And his last name is ‘Kamdar’ – the middle letter is ‘m’, the same as the middle letter in ‘Freemason’ !! AHA!!! This is definite proof that Muslim Matters is part of the Pokemon-Coca Cola axis!!

    So don’t pay attention to this article! Go back to reading some ridiculous fowarded email about the kalimah spontaneously appearing on a pizza.

  24. Abu Ismail

    March 24, 2011 at 6:55 PM

    Finally someone addresses this issue! There also should be an article on fake miracles. (unless there already is one). The sad part is these theories in many cases become mainstream. The coca cola one for example led to a campaign endorsed by Al Azhar higher ups to ban coke from Egypt and to which Coca Cola actually had to address through a press release saying that there is no truth to the rumor. Pretty embarrassing to see Muslims fall into such unintelligible rumors. And we are a nation that’s supposed to verify information!

    Btw 4000 Jews called out sick on 911 from the WTC

  25. Abu Ismail

    March 24, 2011 at 6:58 PM

    And the 4000 jew rumor was even cited as evidence of their involvement in 911 in a published Islamic book that many of you may have even seen.

  26. Nihal Khan

    March 24, 2011 at 8:49 PM

    How do you respond when someone calls you wahhabi? (For the urdu speakers)

    “Mai yahaa bhi hu aur wahaan bhi hu (wahhabi hu)!”

    :)

  27. The Muslim Voice

    March 24, 2011 at 8:57 PM

    Awesome post lol! MashAllah

  28. abu Yunus

    March 24, 2011 at 9:56 PM

    One must distinguish conspiracy theories from conspiracy facts lest one throws the baby with the bathwater.

  29. Student Of Knowledge

    March 24, 2011 at 11:53 PM

    The main cause for all of such things is ignorance. When muslims are ignorant and lack knowledge in Islam they fall for anything. Some “shaykhs” out there are also spreading false theories about the Dajjal and that he is the television or money and all kinds of crazy theories of trying to interpret what the Dajjal is, when in reality the ahadith are very clear and explicit that the Dajjal is an actual person, not a system nor a piece of equipment nor a dollar bill..

    What is even more sad is how some muslims read these conspiracy theories and laugh them off while on the other hand they believe a lot of the stories and ahadith that they have heard from random sources or “shaykhs” even though these stories are not authentic and might be completely fabricated lies. Unfortunately, many “khateebs” (from my experience I would say over 80% of them) use such false stories in their khutbas and lectures, and the majority of people listening usually don’t know any better so they believe what they hear and even start spreading it!

    For those unsuspecting brothers and sisters who have been believing everything they hear I would suggest that you don’t believe anything before you review its authenticity because I would say that probably more than 50% of the stories that you have heard about the seerah or some of the salaf are usually not true at all. I would post a list of the most widespread false stories here but it would be too long and extend into the hundreds or even thousands.

  30. Brother

    March 25, 2011 at 12:02 AM

    Possible Pro-Islam Conspiracy Theories: Some conspiracy theories (hoaxes) are supposed to boost iman, i.e. what happened when the first man landed on the moon. But there is also that one about Aramco covering up giant skeletons and some sort of central radiation coming out of Mecca. But lies tend to do the opposite.

    • Student Of Knowledge

      March 25, 2011 at 12:15 AM

      There are plenty of lies that muslims are spreading themselves about the seerah which look like they are positive and pro-Islam which is why many are unaware that they are lies and spread them without knowing.

    • Ismail Kamdar

      March 29, 2011 at 1:31 AM

      These tend to fall into the category of fake miracles to boost Iman, as opposed to pocket monsters that poke Iman. It requires an article itself.

  31. QasYm

    March 25, 2011 at 12:50 AM

    “Brothers talking about Illuminati, if you want to be Illuminated go pray Fajr in the Masjid”
    – Shaykh Suhaib Webb

  32. maddhater

    March 25, 2011 at 12:00 PM

    I CAUGHT’EM ALL!

    • Ismail Kamdar

      March 29, 2011 at 1:24 AM

      That would mean Iman got a lot of pokes from you.

  33. Junny

    March 25, 2011 at 8:39 PM

    There’s even a notion of ‘Islam’s enemies’ in the Arab world where the ‘enemies of Islam’ are insidiously decaying the morals of youth through alluring dancing girls in music videos. I don’t listen to Arabic pop music (99% of which is worse than the Gaga-Usher-Pitbull billboard nonsense), but in the few occassions that I do, I either hear lyric verses or entire lyrics of songs devoted to attacking traditional norms by infusing curiosity and ‘love-struckness’ in the 12-24 yo demographic or (a’oothubillah) lyrics ripping out words or expressions from the Quran and Hadith and using it in a context of ‘passion’ (hawa – which is the musical buzzword of Arabic pop) or love (‘ishq, hubb).

    Of course, the lyricists work under the two major record labels: Rotana music (mostly Christian Lebanese singers) and Melody music (mostly Lebanese and Egyptian singers) are mostly whitewashed Western-wannabes Christian & Muslim Lebanese folk.

    Personally, I find this ‘insidious enemies of Islam’ thing pure hogwash. Commercialism and corporatism have taken over the Arabsat and Nilesat satellite receivers, and now the raunch culture of the West (although limited) has found its way into the conservative Arab culture milieu.

  34. Abdullah

    March 27, 2011 at 10:23 AM

    “It is the “kaafir” technology that brought petroleum wealth to Saudi for example.” It is Allah that brought them their wealth, not the kuffar.

    • Amad

      March 27, 2011 at 12:15 PM

      Man proposes and Allah disposes. Allah is the creator of all actions, nothing happens except by His Will. But that doesn’t mean humans don’t have a role to play. Everyday we thank people. We thank our parents, we thank our bosses, we thank our secretaries, we thank our friends. This doesn’t mean that they did what they did without Allah’s permission.

      “…The one who is not thankful for the few blessings will not be thankful for the many. And the one who is not thankful to the people will not be thankful to Allah…” (Al-Bayhaqi)

      • Everybody's Dad

        March 27, 2011 at 2:53 PM

        Thanks Amad!
        I hate it when people, Muslims in particular, start resorting to a crude form of fatalism to try and side-step the issues which confront them

        :)

    • Ismail Kamdar

      March 29, 2011 at 1:22 AM

      And I suppose you only use “Muslim” technology

  35. Humble Muslim

    March 28, 2011 at 11:45 AM

    Salam

    One thing which really annoys me is when muslims think that evolution is some sort of ‘secret plot’ to destroy religion. I’m sure we’ve all had biology teachers, and it’s pretty clear to me that such people don’t have any kind of ‘hidden agenda’, they simply want to teach what they think is scientifically correct.

  36. Leo

    April 1, 2011 at 3:10 AM

    As-Salaamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh,

    Dear author, going by the evidence you have provided us about yourself regarding your views, I assume you believe you know better than sheikhs such as Hamza Yusuf or Imran Hosein? Granted, it is apparent you have not heard their lectures regarding these conspiracies. I suppose you also believe that Masih ad-Dajjal will just magically *poof* in existence one day and the end time prophecies of corruption toward Muslims is also a fairy tale to you?

    I do thank you though, because you have made it ever so clear that the Ummah’s worst enemy is itself, albeit, not in the way you proposed. There are those whom Allah subhanahu wa ta’aala Chooses to guide and then the rest who choose to live in ignorance under the deception of a Dajjalic system built on lies and hatred toward the Arab world. Allah subhanahu wa ta’aala Blessed us with a brain for a reason, not to blindly follow what others say.

    I can write a novel here, but really, how does one debate with another whom has his/her sight blinded by their own ignorance and arrogance? This article deeply troubled me not for writing what you did, as I’ve seen much criticism from non-Muslims or non-Arabs regarding the same issue, but that you as a Muslim (I assume you are, correct?) have decided to further brain wash the minds of an already enslaved population.

    Before I conclude my message, I’d like to point out that it’s incredibly ironic that you brought up the point about Muslims not studying enough Islamic history, yet you yourself are completely contradicting lectures by one of the greatest sheikhs of our time Hamza Yusuf. Have you even done any research yourself or have you simply read the Noble Qur’an in Arabic once or twice without even bothering to study it?

    Oh well, I suppose Qiyammah is supposed to just magically appear one day with no signs to precede it, rather that we are not even experiencing any of them now. Brother, you can continue to write about such topics and live gleefully with your apologetic stance toward Islam with Western culture, but insh’Allah ta’aala, the truth will be revealed one day.

    Salaam

    • Student Of Knowledge

      April 4, 2011 at 1:47 AM

      Dear brother Leo,

      These interpretations of the Dajjal not only contradict what the hadiths clearly mention, but such interpretation of things has many implications which I don’t think you have thought them through, neither have any of these ‘shaykhs’ that are coming up with these random theories.

      Just to give you one example, Imran Hosein says that the sun has already risen from the west! Sure he tries to justify it by providing a twisted argument, but if you believe that then you also have to accept the implications of such a statement. If the sun had already risen from the west (according to his own interpretation), then the door for repentance is already closed as this is clearly mentioned in hadiths that when the sun rises from the west the truth is known and no one can repent after that. Imran Hosein also argues that the Dajjal was already released and so were Gog and Magog, and the implications to that is we all know that Jesus will come down and kill the Dajjal before Gog and Magog are released, so where is he if Imran Hosein is claiming that Gog and Magog have already been released?

      As for your question about the Dajjal magically coming into existence, the reality is that the Dajjal already exists on earth and has been in existence since the time of the Prophet because one of the companions actually saw him tied up on an island, refer to the hadith in Saheeh Muslim if you want to read the whole story in details. So the Dajjal already exists but he has not been released yet.

      As for your justification of such theories just because there is a corrupt system, then that argument is not a strong one. Sure a certain system might be corrupt, but that does not mean it is the Dajjal. Who said that the only corrupt thing or evil thing that exists has to be the Dajjal or part of his system?

      It seems that you just heard these lectures of random “shaykhs” about different theories on the Dajjal, and believed those twisted interpretations because the way they were presented as the obvious truth. I would ecourage you to do your own research and read all the authentic hadiths about the Dajjal, Gog and Magog, the sun rising from the west, and the other signs so that you are able to better understand why such theories are clearly not valid and go against what the Prophet had mentioned.

  37. Ahsan

    May 29, 2011 at 3:20 AM

    conspiracy theories discussion is common in my workplace…it brings no solution. Though muslims should be aware of the dangers the ummah faces, but conspiracy theories are a bit extreme as my teacher very well explained.
    I want to emphaise brother ismails message, that we really need to spend our time in learning islam, implementing it and calling others to it.

  38. Khai

    May 30, 2011 at 2:23 PM

    Salam to all,
    After reading most of the comments,I want to know more about these conspiracy theories basically because I want to find out the truth..What is the purpose of these conspiracy theories??

    From my point of view,we cannot just take videos or lectures without researching more on them..I checked on WakeUp Project.com,I looked at Harun Yahya’s videos and I read several Islamic history back from how the Khilafah was built and destroyed.The temple of Solomon,The Knights of Templar,Freemasonry…so are these also conspiracy theories or facts?Am I also obsessed in these theories?
    You see,in order for us to distinguish the good and the bad,you need to have knowledge…but,what kind of knowledge?Quran and Hadith..

    Let us follow the akhlak of the great early scholars like Imam Bukhari who rationalise during discussions not based on nafs..for the sake of sharing knowledge and attaining truth..

    In conjuction with these theories,we also have to learn Islam by studying the Quran and hadiths so as to increase our faith…What do we learn from the Battle of Badr?

    My fellow Muslim bros,I am a Muslim bro to you so as you are to me…Its just very sad that we Muslims still are not united,and based from all of the comments given,am I right to say that we are shooting each other off???We need to know our common enemy!!
    Wallah wua’lam..Whatever good comes from ALLAH and whatever bad comes from my mistakes..
    (Oh ALLAH,guide us all)

  39. Me

    July 5, 2011 at 12:56 PM

    [comment removed by illuminati]

  40. ahsan fuzail

    June 28, 2012 at 9:05 AM

    highly enlightening message.subhanallah. however we must realise that todays world is not completely innocent. true that many theories are fabricated but just as many theories exist that have now been proven to be true. the anti-islamism in this world is highly profane and that we all should pray to allah for forgiveness. the world may be bad but there are many good things within it. look at the good things multiply the good things and to hell with the bad ones.

  41. Johnny Blaze

    December 20, 2012 at 7:03 AM

    Masha’Allah brother, an excellent read! Got a good chuckle out of Zakumi!

    JazakAllahu Khairun for sharing this beneficial reminder

  42. Saad jamshaid

    January 17, 2014 at 9:58 PM

    We talk about the authenticated truth. So therefore the word conspiracy isn’t relevant here. See you have not addressed any such knowledge of truth. Your words don’t hold weight. As a few brothers said, we want to be aware if the truth which is knowledge from logic and Ultimately Allah. You obviously are not knowledgable to speak on such a topic and definitely not enough to debate. Let me ask u this. Do aliens exist? Is that a conspiracy? Because my eyes were counting 6 u f o s in the night sky a few days back. This isn’t necessary either but u get my point. The time for the arrival has never been closer and decreases year by year. But obviously you have not read the Quran in depth and the Hadith in depth. I apologize for the disrespect towards the people in here like the starter of this topic who are actually the ones creating the useless arguments and misguiding those who are already misguided or anyone else as the brother said earlier. We must understand of the time we live in today. And apparently you don’t have that knowledge.

  43. Anon

    August 22, 2014 at 8:49 PM

    Comment removed due to Anon name and incorrect email address. This is a violation of the Comments Policy

    Aly
    CommentsTeam Lead

  44. Qasim tushabe

    October 31, 2015 at 4:15 AM

    Jazaaka LLAH khayran

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