There are approximately 2,000 Mosques in the United Kingdom.  The overwhelming majority of mosques in UK have Imams who do not speak fluent English. Perhaps less than 10% of the Imams within the UK mosques were born and brought up in Britain. Therefore, in the vast majority of mosques in the UK, we have Imams who are not able to (as some have forwarded) meet the various needs of the groups of people within their communities, especially the younger generation of Muslims. The young generation of Muslims may speak and understand Urdu, Bengali, Somali etc, but they speak and think in the English language.

Although, the call from certain Muslim leaders in Britain is to 'ban' foreign Imams, it has come under resistance, I personally concur with it to a certain degree.  The youth in particular have been neglected by our mosques for far too long. Many do not even approach the mosques because they feel they cannot speak to the Imam. Even when some do conjure up the courage to approach the Imam and inform them about the problems they may be facing in their education establishments, family & social groups, drugs, girls, sex, political issues and radicalization, the Imam, in most cases, do not and are not able to provide appropriate answers and responses to their dilemmas. Who can blame the Imams; they were born and brought up in a completely different environment and culture. No matter how much one tries he will not be able to relate to their aspirations, fears, anxieties and concerns.

Changing Trend

There are however an increasing number of young British born Imams who have studied in Islamic seminaries here in the UK and abroad and later pursue other secular studies to enhance their capacity to benefit their local communities and the wider community. The community needs to evaluate and think how they can be incorporated in the mosque's establishments.

I am not suggesting that we ban all non-English speaking Imams. The mosque can employ someone who is competent in English language. I am aware of the fact that many mosques here in Britain do not have the sufficient resources to employ more than one Imam. This is another problem, which I will not delve into much at the moment. However, those mosques that are not able to employ young English-speaking Imams need to encourage the existing Imams to learn English language and acquire the knowledge of the society they live in. How can a person be in a position of leadership and live in a country for more than 20 years, and not be able to speak the language, this is beyond me! This shows the lack of vision some of these people have for the future generation of Muslims in this country and generally the West.

Imams for All

What is more worrying is that many people import their village and cultural polemics which has nothing to do with Islam or British Muslims. Much of the discourse amongst some circles is alien to British societies and Muslims who were born and educated here, especially the youth. This works as a tool of division more than anything else.

As an example, I have personally witnessed and have been informed by some people, that there is a touch of racism amongst some Imams (I pray this is not widespread). Most of the Imams in Britain are either from Bangladesh, Pakistan or India. Whether we like it or not, there are some anxieties between the older generation from the past and history between these countries. As people 'celebrate' 40 years of independence and remember the bloody and unislamic tragedy that took place between two Muslim nations, there are people complaining in London that the 'Pakistani' Imam looks down upon our Bangladeshi community, or this 'Bangladeshi' Imam looks down upon our Pakistani community.

Imams are supposed to be individuals whom the entire community follows, not just one section of the community. It is worrying that this is still a problem in the UK and in the 21st century. I do not think this is much of a problem among the younger generation. Yes, they do have other issues and concerns to tackle. I am not denying there will not be problems among the younger generation, there will be, but I am confident that they will be very easily resolved. One of the problems with some of the elder generation is that some of their cultural and unislamic attitudes are ingrained in their psyche; it will require a radical reform of change in their mind-set and norm values to change them. We ask God, Almighty, to join their hearts.

Witnesses unto Mankind

Another very important point is about relations with the wider community. The Qurʾān commands Imams to speak in the 'language of the nation', to invite and interact with the people in the country they work and live. Without knowing English language, understanding the society, its history and culture, a person is blind himself. How will he then be in a position to guide others?

I would not be too worried if some of the Imams (who may not have adequate level of skill in English language, etc.) carried out their duties appropriately. Unfortunately, some people have an incomplete understanding of what the role of an Imam should be. They believe that all that is required from an Imam's position is to lead the daily congregational prayers, lead the Friday congregational prayer and deliver a sermon from reading an outdated book of sermons, issue some ta'weez (talisman) and teach the children Qurʾān, most of whom hate coming to the classes. You do not need to study for six to eight years in an Islamic institute or a seminary to carry out those tasks. Any non-specialist could be trained to do that! The community lacks basic knowledge of Islam and the Imams must try to facilitate the learning for them. I am aware that many times it is not the fault of the Imams; they are restricted by the mosque committees and cultural baggage. But that is another topic for discussion.

Look Mum, it's Santa Claus!

On a lighter note and to end this week's segment, allow me to narrate to you what happened during a train journey some time ago. I used to commute to the mosque by the underground train to deliver the Friday sermon in Central London. It was near the time of Christmas and as usual all of London was buzzing with the Christmas fervor. I sat down in the train reading my book; opposite of me was a young, white English girl (around 4 years of age) with her mother. The young girl kept on looking at me and smiling. At first I did not pay much attention, but the girl kept on looking at me. Now I got a bit worried. “Did she think I am one of those 'Moslem' extremists the media always talks about?”, I asked myself. I continued to read my book as if nothing had happened. Then, all of a sudden, she pointed at me and said “look mum, it's Daddy”. I was like 'OK'. The mother explained to the girl that Daddy does not have a beard. After a few minutes the girl pointed at me and said “look mum, it's Santa Claus”. I don't know why she thought that; was it because of my beard? Or was it due to the fact that I was wearing a rust thawb that may have resembled the Santa Claus costume? The mother and I laughed and she explained to her that Santa Claus is much older and bigger.

This was first published on OnIslam.net.

A piece of cloth that made me look different, caused many to stare and laugh at me, slowly became my pride. It was not just ḥijāb anymore; it made me realize what it meant to do something for no other purpose than to please Allāh alone; to be tested and along the way to become stronger (inshā'Allāh).

Ḥijāb became a responsibility. It was a symbol or worship and servitude to Allāh azzawajal. I was representing my dīn every time I stepped out of my house. I started enjoying being an ambassador. I used my ḥijāb to avail every opportunity to make da'wah.

There were tough times too, especially when my children started growing older and noticed their mother was different from others. There were times when they stood out just because their mother looked different. Or when the kids around the corner laughed at my young daughter asking “Hey what's on your head?”. It was then that I felt uneasy exposing my children to an unnecessary challenge. I felt the need to escape away to a place where wearing ḥijāb was not difficult, rather part of the norm. Little did I realize that it was those difficulties and challenges that had transformed ḥijāb into my pride.

We moved to a place where ḥijāb was everywhere. It was not difficult to cover anymore, no one laughed at ḥijāb. Stares? That is another discussion!

In the West, ḥijāb is frequently misunderstood as “cultural”. I was often appalled at this misrepresentation. It was not until I moved to the Middle East that I understood the grounds of Western arguments. I realized accusing ḥijāb as a cultural practice forced on women by their men folk, holds water.

Ḥijāb and jilbabs are very common here, but the oppression is reflected through the way ḥijāb is worn. Sometimes, it feels like women are in a prison waiting to break out. A sheer piece of black cloth carelessly resting midway across their head, the layers of hair slipping attractively out from the front makes these women look no less stunning than Princess Jasmine. Layers and layers of make up makes me wonder if they get ready at salons every day. Many women use artificial hair-buns under their hijabs, making it look like a perfect “camel-hump”.

Many women wear front-open abayas that split open up at every step they take; a glance of their tight skinny jeans and high heeled sandals only make them seem far more alluring.

That's not all. Jilbabs are tight. Some women cover their faces (which is mostly forced by their families) but their skin-tight jilbabs, designed especially to enhance body curves, are enough to catch anyone's attention; forget the faces.

Many women here do not want to wear ḥijāb but are forced to by their families.  One of my local teachers at Qatar University informed me that her brothers can never find out she doesn't cover her face at the university or she will be forced to quit. I don't know how ḥijāb evolved into culture, but unfortunately it did. Even the welcoming package and little leaflets designed for expatriates introduce ḥijāb as a cultural dress code.

I wonder what impression all those non-Muslim expatriates take back to their respective countries. Can they be blamed for accusing Muslims  of imposing ḥijāb on women?

The other day, during the PTA meeting, two of the European moms asked me if I was wearing “all this” to adapt to the local culture!

I have never been asked about my ḥijāb from this perspective before. At first I was confused, but as their question sank in, I was ashamed. It took me a few minutes to answer their question, but, alhamdulillah, that day they left with a better understanding of ḥijāb.

There is always khayr in whatever happens in our lives; I learned a lot from my move that I might have never learned otherwise. Firstly, difficulties and challenges are not unnecessary, rather, they reform us.

Secondly, not all Western accusations are unfounded.

We should realize that it is partially our own fault that ḥijāb is misunderstood. Had our  Muslim brethren not sent out the wrong message, much against ḥijāb would have been easier to clarify. Some progressive females, who label ḥijāb as a forced cultural practice, are as ignorant of ḥijāb as many Muslim women in “Muslim” countries. We have a lot of work to do from within. At times, it seems easier to make da'wah to non-Muslims than Muslims themselves. May Allāh make the real knowledge of Islam sink into our hearts and return us our glory and 'izzah that we have lost at our own hands.

Dr. O blogs at Muslim Medicine, a site that strives to serve only the freshest grade-A certified ẓabiḥah ḥalāl comedy. Contact your local ḥalāl butcher for more details..

Back in the olden days, it was a much simpler time.

Every Friday morning would be a bright and wondrous journey to the local masjid for Muslims, all of whom would strap on their worn-out footwear and proudly travel by foot – and with every step they'd take, such a profound blessing would be levied upon them.

As communities grew and expanded outward, Muslims found themselves too far from the masjid to simply walk there, and out of necessity they began to develop cutting-edge technological advancements in transportation.

Due to perpetual stereotyping, Muslims began researching alternate forms of transportation, and began to utilize actual machines instead of animal-based modes of transport. Their dear love for animals, however, was still incorporated into their usual travel habits:

But then history took an unexpected turn, and suddenly… Muslims discovered the car. An oil-powered motorized carriage that soon became a dream come true for everyone, especially lazy Muslims who lived miles away.

But shortly after this discovery, the widespread use of the car had untold implications on the historic and iconic journey to the masjid for Jumu'ah, and a vicious disease known as Masjid Parking Syndrome began to spread through the entire ummah faster than acute-onset Bieber Fever spreading through hormonally-repressed pre-teen girls.

Masjid Parking Syndrome (MPS): a long-term chronic disease of the Muslim body whereupon automobile driving and parking skills rapidly deteriorate when attempting to travel to and park near an Islamic facility.

A classic example of the disease presentation is shown below:

Masjid Parking Syndrome is an extremely widespread disease, found to be contagious amongst entire Muslim communities who reside in areas of the world where cars are the primary mode of transportation.

The disease is mainly found in suburban masājid with small parking lots, but is compounded to horrific levels in inner-city masājid, where every Friday afternoon the very city streets fall prey to a swarm of parking space-hungry Muslims hunting for a spot to show off their cringe-worthy “gracefulness” at parallel parking:

Now, we know what you're thinking – “how do I know if I'm at risk for developing this disease?!” Well, if you're already driving your car with the same level of coordination as a blind-folded giraffe wearing roller-skates, then being at risk for parking ridiculously at the masjid is probably the least of your worries.

But if you consider yourself a decent driver, then MuslimMatters has compiled a few risk factor charts that may come in handy for you.

As you can see, the bigger the attendance level, the fewer the parking spot availabilities, and the more desperate Muslim drivers get. And if you think that's bad? One of the biggest risk factors is tardiness. Muslims are almost always perpetually late to pretty much everything, and Jumu'ah is no exception:

The actual symptoms of Masjid Parking Disorder are fairly easy to catch. You simply show up for Jumu'ah or 'Īd ṣalāh and you should almost naturally be welcomed by horrific scenes of the worst parking jobs imaginable. As we noted clearly above, the later you arrive to the masjid, the more extreme the parking symptoms become:

While the disease is not fatal to the patient, it is extremely harmful to surrounding bystanders, damaging to other vehicles, and profoundly irritating to all other masjid attendees who are tortured by constant interruptions from the masjid board members:

How do you even treat a disease this deeply rooted in our community? Unfortunately… no complete cure currently exists for Masjid Parking Syndrome. Some Muslim physicians have suggested prevention as the best form of halting the spread of this syndrome, and have gone so far as to even start patients on more natural treatment regiments that return us to our roots, such as riding camels to Jumu'ah:

The treatment seemed to go well at first, but the reaction of the camels, however, was rather unexpected:

Prevention is always the best means of treatment, and for this rather unfortunate affliction in our community, a reminder of the sheer brilliance of the blessings showered upon those who arrive early to Jumu'ah is brought to mind:

Abu Hurayrah narrated that the Messenger of Allāh said: “Whoever does ghusl on Friday like ghusl for janābah, then goes to the prayer (in the first hour, i.e., early), it is as if he sacrificed a camel. Whoever goes in the second hour, it is as if he sacrificed a cow; whoever goes in the third hour, it is as if he sacrificed a horned ram; whoever goes in the fourth hour, it is as if he sacrificed a hen; and whoever goes in the fifth hour it is as if he offered an egg. When the imam comes out, the angels come to listen to the khuṭbah.” Al-Bukhāri (814) and Muslim (850)

Jumu'ah isn't an event that suddenly pops out of nowhere for us, so it's best to prepare for it in advance every week to take full advantage of its blessings, and avoid the usual rush of Muslims arriving late for it and resorting to parking violations just to attend. Also, it's pretty obvious that the Jumu'ah rush takes a huge toll on the patience of the neighbors surrounding the masjid, and proper adab for a Muslim community is to follow the example of the Rasūl and respect the property and space of neighbors to the House of Allāh .

Parking may seem like something trivial to most Muslims, but Islam places such a big emphasis on the manner and timing of our arrival to Jumu'ah, so we should pay the same respect to that too. Follow in the footsteps of our great ṣaḥābah and our Prophet , and park a little farther from the masjid to reap the rewards of every step taken towards His House.

Every so often, a book comes along that forces us to radically re-think our basic assumptions.  Wilkinson and Pickett's The Spirit Level, a culmination of fifty years painstaking research work, is exactly that.  What is most remarkable of all is that after half a century of research and numerous scatter graphs later, two British Professors of Epidemiology draw conclusions that look remarkably similar to those recommended by the Qurʾān and Sunnah fourteen hundred years ago.

In the wake of the riots, many of us ask ourselves: how can we build a society where people are happy, healthy and safe? In the midst of the financial crisis, we ask how to maximize economic progress and entrepreneurship?  The answer to these questions lies in something that Western societies have been failing to do for many years now, with major consequence.  Simply reduce the gap between rich and poor.

Using multiple sets of data from organizations such as the US Census, WHO, World Bank and United Nations, comparing a spread of developed countries, Wilkinson and Pickett show time and time again that countries that are unequal come out worst.  Whether it's societal trust, literacy rates, crime, drug abuse, childhood welfare and even rates of imprisonment, we are shocked to discover that America, Britain and Portugal do the worst.  The best performing countries include Norway, Sweden and Japan which conversely have much greater equality.

What is notable is that the countries that do worse on one measure of social deprivation tend to score worse on every measure.  Astonishingly, the US and the UK do worst on mental illness, women's status, life expectancy, infant mortality and even international aid given. According to the statistics, we are even more violent and conflict ridden than the other countries sampled.

Admittedly, there is no data from the developing world, simply because this is unavailable, but the evidence consistently points to a relationship much more connected to financial inequality than culture, religion or even national GDP.

The research also concludes that inequality does not just affect the poorest in society, but also the richest, who do less well than they would have done in a more equal country. Reducing the gap between rich and poor will increase everybody's well being and life expectancy, it is argued.

So how does this research connect to Islam? The study concludes that it does not matter how you reach equality, but merely that you do reach it.  Intrinsic to Islam, are two major mechanisms that level out wealth.  One is the clear prohibition of interest:

“O you who believe! Fear Allāh, and forgo any remaining usury.” (2:278)

Interest is one of the main reasons that the rich are getting richer and the poor remain dependent.  Through the maintenance of debt such as mortgages and IMF loans, there are few opportunities by which the poor can escape the pit they are in.

Secondly, Islam reduces inequality by enforcing zakāh (obligatory charity).  Although this is only 2.5% of one's surplus wealth given annually, it is a very effective way of re-distributing societal wealth, particularly when it comes from the very rich.  The encouragement of further charitable giving in other parts of the year, such as Ramaḍān and 'Īd, also further reduces inequality, which as we now know helps to improve society for everyone.

Why does a relationship exist between inequality and social deprivation? The authors suggest that the tendency of the rich to look down upon the poor, or the perception by  the poor that they are discriminated against may be the reason for poor performance.  In 2004, Hoff and Pandey, two World Bank economists, did an experiment in India where they took 321 high caste boys and 321 low caste boys and gave them a maze-solving task.  The first group did the puzzle without being aware of each other's castes.  The second group of boys was asked to first stand up and declare their name, village, caste and parentage.  The results showed a dramatic drop in performance of the low caste boys and an improvement in the high caste boys.

Resentment and anxiety due to discrimination, they argue, may explain poor mental health, personal achievement and greater crime rates.  As the poor are increasingly ghettoized, the problem is continually compounded – few role models, bad experiences and low aspirations.

Once more, Islam has within it the capacity to prevent this kind of decline.  Gatherings such as the five daily prayers, the Friday sermon, 'Īd gatherings and even Ḥajj force the very rich to stand shoulder to shoulder with the very poor, as the whole community come together with one purpose – the worship of Allāh.  A rich Muslim can never fully isolate himself from the problems of his poorer brother, nor can he justify looking down upon him, for he knows that the only thing that matters with Allāh is his piety and not his wealth.  Indeed, if he was genuine in increasing his status with Allāh, he might do this by giving charity to his poor brother discreetly and in a way that would not affront his brother's dignity (as is clearly commanded in the Qurʾān).

What remains to be seen is whether Wilkinson and Pickett's powerful book can impact society sufficiently to bring about change.  Will the average person who hears about the findings care enough to act on it and lobby government?  Everyone benefits after all.

I hope so for the sake of humanity.  Yet there remains some doubt.  I do not believe that the rich will stop hoarding wealth voluntarily. It is unlikely that the socially deprived will get to hear of this work through the popular press.  And so it rests upon the educated to equip themselves with this knowledge and disseminate it to their friends to create something of a democratic tidal wave.  Whilst the work has been very well received, is there enough societal momentum to sustain a change?

As Muslims, this should be a subject area that we care deeply about.  The Prophet is reported to have said, “He is not a believer who eats his fill while his neighbor is hungry.” [Tabarani]

So I put it to you, the reader: will you stand up and make a change?

Perhaps you've tried to ignore it as I have. But you cannot.

Why? Because it's everywhere.

No, it's not the wildly fluctuating winter temperatures. It's not the political wrangling in Washington. It is Harry Potter.

Last summer, the final installment in the Harry Potter movies came out. And this time, I learned to accept the fact that Harry Potter was going to be big no matter what. And whether I liked it or not, millions of young Muslims were going to watch the last movie in the series.

You've probably heard much of the same rhetoric I have over the past ten years. Ever since Harry Potter became an international phenomenon, Muslim parents, speakers, lecturers and imams have spoken out against the boy with the scar.

• “Magic and sorcery is becoming more accepted in today's society.”

• “The devil is trying to influence your children to believe magic is okay.”

• “Harry Potter is eeeeevvviiiillll!”

I'm not here to defend Harry Potter. There are some things about the series I don't really care for either. Like the whole “Dumbledore is gay” thing.

Nonetheless, I believe there is good in everything. For instance, I'm not a fan of U.S. foreign policy. But there are many things I like about the United States.

With that in mind, I wanted to create a list of things we (people who have read or watched the series) can take from Harry Potter that might actually benefit us. Inshā'Allāh, we'll see that the boy with the scar can teach us something after all.

1. There's Nothing Wrong With Mudbloods.

In the Harry Potter series, there were wizards who were pure-bloods and wizards who were “mudbloods.”

Pure-bloods were wizards who came from a pure wizarding family. Mudbloods were wizards who were born from Muggle (human) parents.

In the story, many of the pure blood wizards felt they were better than the mudbloods. In fact, the term mudblood is actually a derogatory term for Muggle-born wizards.

• Some pure-bloods hold a supremacist attitude towards mudbloods.

• Some pure-bloods refuse to marry mudbloods and look down on wizards who do.

• Some pure-bloods even treat mudbloods as second-class citizens.

Unfortunately, we have some of these same problems in the Muslim world. As an African-American son of Muslim converts, I've seen my fare share of “Pure-Blood Supremacy” amongst Muslims.

• Some Muslims who come from the Middle East or Indian subcontinent seem to think I'm ignorant about Islamic laws and  requirements.

• Some Muslims seem to think American Muslims have not memorized much Quran or learned the rules of Tajwid.

• Some Muslims refuse to let their children (especially their daughters) marry outside their race, nationality, or tribe.

One of the best lessons learned from Harry Potter is that it's perfectly okay to be a Mudblood. Furthermore, a Mudblood is often just as good a wizard as a Pure-blood.

The same holds true for Muslims. An American-born Muslim may be just as knowledgeable about Islam, and just as good a Muslim as our foreign-born brethren.

2. Don't Be Afraid To Say You-Know-Who's Name.

Voldemort is the main antagonist in the series. He's Harry Potter's arch enemy.

Before the beginning of the series, Voldemort and several evil wizards stage a rebellion and take over the wizarding world. This resulted in the death of several wizards, including Harry Potter's parents.

Eventually, Voldemort is defeated, order is restored, and things go back to normal. However, the legacy of Voldermort's reign is so traumatic just about everyone is afraid to say his name.

Instead they refer to him using cryptic phrases such as “You-Know-Who” and “He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named.” Only Harry Potter, who is initially ignorant of Voldemort's evil deeds and Professor Dumbledore are brave enough to say his name.

Perhaps you've noticed some topics that are taboo in your Muslim community also. Sometimes, it seems like Muslim leaders and parents are afraid to talk about some of these sensitive subjects.

Topics such as:

• Sex

• Drugs

• Terrorism

• Racism

This list may differ based on your locality and community. But it's still the same song. The people in positions of leadership don't want to ruffle feathers and so they stay away from these serious topics.

Don't be afraid to say Voldemort's name. Don't be afraid to talk about these topics that are important and impact us all.

3. You Can Influence the Sorting Hat

In the first Harry Potter novel, the new students at Hogwart School of Witchcraft and Wizardy go through a sorting procedure to see which house they will belong to. They take their turns under a talking hat that reads their mind and analyzes their character.

Based on this information, the Sorting Hat places them in one of four different houses within Hogwarts:

• Gryffindor

• Slytherin

• Hufflepuff

• Ravenclaw

When it was Harry's turn to go under the Sorting Hat, it wanted to place him in the Slytherin house. Based on Harry's character and abilities, the Hat felt Harry would have been a great addition to that house.

But Harry did not want to go to Slytherin. Instead of giving in to the Sorting Hat, Harry resisted and insisted he belonged in the Gryffindor house. Eventually, the Sorting Hat gave Harry what he wanted, and sent him to Gryffindor.

What about your Sorting Hat? Are members of your family or your community trying to make you fit into a mold that you don't belong?

Are they insisting that you follow a career path that you're not interested in?

Are they trying to make you marry someone you don't want to marry?

I'm not at all suggesting that you rebel or disobey your parents. However, it is important that you make it clear what you want, especially if you have proof based on Islam. Let them know, in the most respectful way, that they shouldn't push their dreams and desires on you.

Yes, you can influence the Sorting Hat.

4. You May Have to Join Dumbledore's Army.

In the story, Harry's friends realize the danger around them as Voldemort grows stronger throughout the series. They are upset there is no one to teach them how to defend themselves against their enemies.

Hermione, one of Harry's closest friends, suggests that Harry teach them Defense Against the Dark Arts. Harry has had the most experience fighting against dark magic and agrees to secretly teach his friends what he knows.

This group of friends calls themselves “Dumbledore's Army” after the Hogwarts headmaster. They play a critical role later in the series when Voldemort's followers begin their assault.

Is it time for you to join Dumbledore's Army? Are you ready to expand your knowledge of Islam, but there's no one to teach you?

It may be time to go in search of this knowledge for yourself. With the vast possibilities of the internet, you can now get a very sound understanding of Islam without leaving your home, through online Islamic institutes.

Don't wait for someone to start the class at your local Masjid. Be proactive. Go out there and get the knowledge you desire.

5. Muggles Are Boring.

Three of the most unlikeable characters in the entire series are his Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia, and Cousin Dudley. They adopt Harry after the death of his parents before the start of the story.

But they are hardly the loving sort.

They mistreat Harry and hate all things magic and out of the ordinary. They are the epitome of Muggle boorishness.

They are straight-laced, uptight and arrogant.

But most of all, they are boring. And they want Harry to be the same. They hate the fact that he's a wizard and they try their best to suppress his true identity.

Don't be like the Dursleys. It's okay to be different.

Being a Muslim in the West is not easy.

• You dress differently.

• You eat different things.

• You don't celebrate the same holidays.

It's so much easier to be like everyone else. It's much easier to try to fit in with the rest of the Muggles.

But Muggles are boring. And you're not a Muggle.

Don't be afraid to wear your hijab. Don't be afraid to grow your beard. Don't be afraid to tell the Muggles you don't celebrate Christmas or drink alcohol or deal with interest.

Don't be a Muggle.

And don't be a wizard either.

Be the best Muslim you can be.

1. What are you listening to?
2. What are you reading?
3. What are you watching?
4. What technology are you rocking, Mac or PC? Kindle, iPad, Android phone, etc?
5. What's the best piece of advice you've received or an advice you have for MM's readers?

In this week's WIYE, Waleed interviews Imam Zaid Shakir.

[Transcribed by Mehzabeen | The following transcript includes slight modifications for the sake of readability and clarity.]

Waleed Ahmed – So we have a segment called “What's in Your Ear”. What are you listening to these days?

Zaid Shakir – What am I listening to? I'm listening to Qurʾān. Then I'm listening to more Qurʾān. Then I'm listening to more Qurʾān…

WA – Māshā'Allāh! And, what are you reading?

ZS – I'm reading Annie Leonard's 'The Story of Stuff'.

WA – 'The Story of Stuff' – what's that about?

ZS – 'The Story of Stuff' is how everything we do as a society of consumers is destroying the planet. For example, gold is mined in South Africa, the leading gold producer. To produce a wedding band which is a fraction of an ounce of gold leaves behind 20 tonnes of cyanide poisoned sludge. They dredge up 20 tonnes of gold ore, they drench it in cyanide; the gold clings to the cyanide. They extract it, the rest is cyanide poisoned waste. So that's what I'm reading.

I'm reading Nicholas Carr, 'The Shallows', how the internet and being overindulged with it is literally re-wiring our brains. That's what I'm reading right now… in addition to the Qurʾān.

WA – And what are you watching?

ZS – I don't watch TV, except when I visit my father.

WA – Do you have any advice for students of knowledge?

ZS – Student of knowledge? Be serious, be patient. I'll give you the advice that Imam al-Shafiʿī gave, raḥimahullāh. You'll never get knowledge, except with six things. I'll let you know what they are with clarity: intellect; drive – you have to be driven, you can't be a nonchalant student of knowledge – you have to be driven; patience. Someone has to take care of you, cuz you can't work full time and study knowledge full time. The guide of a teacher. And a long time.

Mā'salāma

WA – Salām 'alāykum

She called on good Americans (read: non-Muslims) everywhere to take a stand against the halal turkeys (which may, after all, be stuffed with sharia instead of gizzards.)

Boycott Butterball, she wrote, because:

Turkeys that are halal certified — who wants that, especially on a day on which we are giving thanks to G-d for our freedom?

Oh the ironies that riddle her blog post!

Irony #1: Although Geller uses “G-d,” the traditional Jewish way of spelling the name of the Almighty, she seems unaware of how similar kosher, the traditional Jewish way of preparing food, is to halal. She protests what she calls the cruelty of halal slaughter:

Halal slaughter involves cutting the trachea, the esophagus, and the jugular vein, and letting the blood drain out…

From a description of kosher slaughter:

The procedure consists of a rapid and expert transverse incision with an instrument of surgical sharpness (a chalaf), which severs the major structures and vessels at the neck. See here for more details.

Irony #2: She calls Thanksgiving a great holiday celebrating our freedom and asserts that the way turkeys are slaughtered matters:

Halal turkey, slaughtered according to the rules of Islamic law, is just the opposite of what Thanksgiving represents: freedom and inclusiveness, neither of which are allowed for under that same Islamic law.

So Geller is using the Thanksgiving turkey as a symbol of what she perceives as a free and inclusive America.  There  are generations of native Americans stretching back to the first Thanksgiving who might have a different perspective.  The turkey they shared with the pilgrims was, unlike the halal Butterball, symbolic of values that actually did destroy a civilization.

Irony #3: The halal certification that prompted her rant may not actually reflect Islamically correct slaughter.  I confirmed with a Butterball consumer affairs representative (as did one of Geller's readers) that their “whole turkeys are halal.”  I pursued the issue by asking if that meant their turkeys are slaughtered individually following Islamic guidelines, beginning with saying Bismillah over them.

I have not been able to get a response to this question, despite trying throughout this afternoon and evening through Butterball's consumer affairs department and media relations representatives.

I would love to be told that mass-produced poultry are slaughtered humanely, but I find it impossible to believe.  Meat production is about making money, and doing individual slaughtering with care and attention, as Islamic law requires, is not the way to minimize costs.

Perhaps there is confusion between halal and dhabiha (zabihah).  It's strange that they emphasize that whole turkeys are halal.  What happens when they chop the turkey up that makes it haram?  Do they spray it with bacon grease?  Unless they tell us, we can't know.

Bottom line: if Americans can't bear the thought of putting something labeled halal in their mouths, their best bet is to stick with ham – a meat guaranteed to be free of Islamic influence, stealthy or otherwise.

1. What are you listening to?
2. What are you reading?
3. What are you watching?
4. What technology are you rocking, Mac or PC? Kindle, iPad, Android phone, etc?
5. What's the best piece of advice you've received or an advice you have for MM's readers?

In this week's WIYE, Iesa Galloway interviews Omar Suleiman – Imam of Masjid Abu Bakr Al-Siddique in New Orleans, LA, and a member of the ICNA Shariah Council.

Click here to view the embedded video.

In Ramadan, around the earthquake-hurricane time in the Northeast, our neighborhood lost electricity for four whole days and nights.  I thought that was bad.

I was sitting in front of the computer when all of a sudden the room lights flickered and then turned off completely.  I looked back at the computer and saw that the Internet wasn't working.  At first I thought, I hoped, that the Internet wasn't working because someone accidentally unplugged something in the other room.  But I knew it right from the moment the lights had flickered and turned off…  something we'd been dreading for nearly a week had happened.  Our electricity had gone out.

Four whole days, having to take flashlights into the bathroom, avoiding opening the fridge in case the cold air came out and hot air went in to make the food go bad, having to take cold showers, finding things to do besides computer were pretty hard. But we reminded ourselves that we still had a warm house and nearby neighbors who still had their electricity and could help us.

However, people in Turkey have lost all of that on Sunday when a 7.2-magnitude earthquake hit.  Over 150 people died and more than 900 buildings were destroyed.  People don't even care about whether they have Internet or not.  Their homes and all their belongings are gone. It's almost early morning in Turkey right now and hundreds of Turks are ending their second night outside in the cold.  Thinking about the relatively small earthquake we had in Delaware a few months ago and how intense the shaking was for us, I can only imagine what it must have been like for the people in Turkey. And thinking about all those people who helped us when we were out of power for four days, I know that now it's our turn to help the earthquake victims.

It is the extreme, sensational cases that make it to the front pages of the newspaper. We were all horrified when we heard of Nazish Noorani, a young mother killed by her abusive husband. What we don't hear are the voices of the abused behind the closed doors of many homes across social, economic, ethnic, racial and gender lines. They exist in our community just as they exist in the non-Muslim communities. We see these men in our masjids, their wives suffering in silence at our picnics and our dinner parties. Domestic violence is, again, a human problem, much like sexual harassment.

By definition, domestic violence is a pattern of abuse – physical, sexual, financial, spiritual, emotional and verbal, including disparagement, blame, being ostracized, isolated and condemned. Domestic violence can be defined as a pattern of behavior in any relationship that is used to gain or maintain power and control over an intimate partner. Not one incident but a pattern.   Men are victims too, 835,000 a year in the US alone, of physical, emotional and financial abuse.

Many cultures think it is the man's God-given right to hit a woman. According to Change from within: Muslim perspectives about Domestic Violence, even the term Domestic Violence is looked upon as suspect by many Muslims because it is reminiscent of “western feminists ideals and doesn't occur in traditional Islamic texts”. Another reason that many do not publicly bring this issue up is because it re-enforces the stereotype that Islam is a violent religion. Others do not want to pry into 'private lives' except to tsk tsk over the plight of another.

In abusive situations where women are the victims, the ones who do gather the courage to tell are told by their families to go back to their abusers for the sake of family, honor, name, children, to be patient and forgive her spouse after the abuse.  Cultural narratives often define why many women do not seek help – i.e. thinking that your husband is Majazi Khuda, a metaphorical God – especially in the South Asian culture.  What is that? That is not Islam. That is Jahiliyyah (ignorance). Growing up, I heard that term, on the television as well as socially, enough times to think that it was a part of the dīn. So to me, it is not surprising that 85% of the women who did seek shelter in the U.S. from abusive marriages were immigrants (according to a survey of shelters by Peaceful Families project.) But this could also be because they could not afford to fly back to their countries of origin or did not have the same support system that indigenous Muslims may have.

Not all Muslim men who abuse their wives do it because they believe it is their Islamic right – many are not religious nor do they think religion is part of the equation.  What is especially troubling is when men who are aspiring to piety and learning about the dīn, engage in violence at home and think it is justified in the religion. These attitudes are disseminated by preachers who spew misogynistic statements like some women can only be controlled through striking or telling men that their wives are dirty beings from the dunya. They make religion hell for women and anyone who speaks out against this is deemed anti-Islamic. How do you think a man will act when he goes home after listening to one of these sermons?  We need to think. People are leaving the religion because of how some Muslims treat women, using 'Islam' as a weapon.

Have you ever heard in the sīrah of the Prophet (ṣallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam), the Mercy to the World, that he ever struck anyone, wife, child, servant, ever? If you aspire to follow his Sunnah, be a husband like him. He was the living embodiment of the Qur'ān. We also know that this issue is dealt in Islam under the broader umbrella of prohibition of oppression and abuse. Allāh hates oppression, so we should hold on to our spouses in goodness, lifting each other spiritually or let them go.

We learn from our shuyūkh, who learned from scholars who have given up their lives for the dīn, sacrificing 20 or more years before making tafsīr of the Qur'ān, that laymen, both Muslim and non-Muslim, who bring up the verses in the Qur'ān suggesting that Islam condones domestic violence, need a reality check.  Ibn Ashur, the Grand Mufti of the Zaytuna in Tunisia in his tafsīr (Tafsīr al-Tahrir wa al-Tanwir) says that men should be punished by authorities when they have lost control of their hawwas and hit their wives, when they commit domestic violence, when they use a verse from the Qur'ān as a means to justify their anger, their rage. According to Ibn Ashur, it is the greatest irony that the verse in the Qur'ān  which came down to eliminate domestic violence is used to propagate domestic violence.

Renowned scholars say that any woman who is suffering from domestic abuse should go to the proper authorities and report her husband because he is committing a sin. If the Muslims won't help her then she can go to anybody else who will grant her sanctuary.  In our dīn, even animals have rights and no one can humiliate or torture them so what about the daughters of Adam, the best of creation?

What should we do as a community?

We need to ask ourselves: do we know what to do if we are faced with such a situation?

What would we do personally if someone who was in an abusive relationship ever approached us for help? How can we be resources to our abused sisters? One of the many things that you can do is join our Khutbah about Domestic Violence Drive – commit your local masjid or mussalla Friday khuṭbah to this topic to spread awareness and start discussions in our communities. Conversations need to take place at the community level urging counseling, psychological and spiritual, for abusers and the abused.

We need to ask ourselves: do our masājid have counselors or ties to domestic violence shelters? For example, in a survey conducted by Peaceful Families most DV shelters have on average 35 mosques in the vicinity but only 12% have any ties to the shelter. Only 6% of imams have any domestic violence training.

We need preachers like Imam Khalid Latif, Shaykh Hamza Yusuf, Shaykh Yasir Qadhi, Imam Zaid Shakir, Maulana Tariq Jameel, and Shaykh Abdullah Hasan, Brother Dawud Walid who frequently speak about this topic and have the knowledge to address this issue. Our own Shaykh Yahya has a post coming soon on the Sunnahs of Love. (Click on the links to hear their views on domestic violence and how to treat your spouses).

We need parents who raise sons who know how to treat women like the Prophet Muḥammad (ṣallallāhu 'alayhi wa sallam) treated the women in his family and teach our daughters to model that tranquility in their own relationships. We need teachers and counselors who can talk to young men and women about how to manage their relationships in ways that please our Creator and who teach young women to respect themselves and recognize signs of abuse. We need doctors and lawyers in our communities who can speak and educate their patients and clients. We need safe homes in our communities where victims/survivors can go. We need unique solutions that include community-based accountability because we cannot always rely on the police because of the anti-immigrant, anti-Muslim and racist policies practiced by the authorities.

We cannot let traumatized men and women suffer in silence wondering: Who would speak to me, for me?  This is our tradition; this our duty.

Interview with Umm Yousef, a survivor and DV advocate

Researchers who have interviewed hundreds of abusers say that it is all about control. In this video, the abuser say that he would plan out exactly how he would treat his family seconds or hours before the incident. Many people who are not in an abusive relationship question why victims don't leave, blaming the victim instead of the perpetrator.

Hope is one of the most common factors that experts see. Many women feel like they would be sinning if they leave. Dependency is another major factor. To find out more about this from a personal view, I interviewed Umm Yousef, who had the courage to leave her abusive marriage. She found shelter in My Sister's House and urges you to support their work.

[Hena Zuberi]:  Many people ask, why don't women leave or why do they keep going back to men who abuse them? What would you say to them?

[Umm Yousef]:  On average, it takes women seven tries to leave an abusive husband. In a way, I am lucky because I did it on the third try, but not before getting back together with my ex and making a baby. To understand why women go back, one has to understand and be aware of many factors including the very nature of the cycle of abuse, the effect of brainwashing, traumatic bonding (also known as Stockholm Syndrome) and the possibility of there having been inter-generational violence (i.e., abuse in a woman's family of origin.)

Another huge reason for staying is fear. One aspect of that fear, in addition to fear of the unknown, relates to the studies that have shown time and again that THE MOST dangerous time for a woman is when she attempts to leave the abuser. Oprah did a show at one point encouraging women in DV relationships to take the threat assessment test that is used to access the threat level to elected officials. To counteract his loss of power and control over the woman, an abuser usually escalates the aggression and abuse, at times to the point of death or serious injury.

Ultimately, if a woman is contemplating leaving an abuser the most important thing is to have two kinds of plans:  an emergency plan if it gets out of hand before the victim is really “ready” and a more long term plan for stability. In one online forum I visited, women had whole bank accounts set aside for leaving their ex, were scoping out apartments, and planning their restraining orders. While this would give a woman the best chance of staying “out” of the relationship by making as clean of a break as possible, there are always those situations where a woman has to leave in the middle of the night with just the clothes on her back and her shoeless children. And that is where emergency DV shelters, friends and family play a vital role.

It bears mentioning that some of the other reasons women choose to stay in an abusive relationship can also include a partner's promise to reform, shame, concern for her children, lack of support, exhaustion, gender-role conditioning, economic concerns, practicalities of the situation, feelings and personal beliefs.

When it is put that way sometimes it can put it in perspective and instead of the oft heard “why did you stay?” more people will be able to understand and empathize with how insurmountable an obstacle it seemed for her to leave. Even now, almost a year later, I still have the occasional desire to go back because it is familiar, and, as the saying goes, the devil that you know…

[HZ]:  Psychologically, how have you been impacted by the abuse? Do you see changes in yourself after getting out of the situation?

[UY]:  I think the biggest impact the abuse had on me was on my self-esteem and sense of self-worth. Secondarily would be the effect it has had on my children and my ability to bond and be a loving mother. I sincerely believe that the abuse exacerbated the post-partum depressions I had with all three of my pregnancies. After 10 years of emotional, physical, financial, and spiritual abuse I attempted suicide at the end of 2010. For many months during my initial attempt at divorce and after I separated for good I experienced anxiety and panic attacks. I have seen multiple therapists and counselors, social workers, psychiatrists, etc, including two marriage and family therapists and a trauma psychologist. Basically, what I have heard time and time again is that while I am “out” in the sense that I am no longer living with him it is far from over. Healing will take time, and in effect, because we have children together, I will never get completely free from the abuse. He will always have a link to me through our kids and will exercise that bit of power and control, continuing to use me as a target for his anger and aggression, from time to time.

[HZ]:  How prevalent is DV in marriages between American converts and men from overseas?

[UY]:  Unfortunately, from what I have seen, pretty frequent. I think this stems from a lack of proper understanding of Islam, lack of knowledge of a woman's rights and a husband's responsibilities, and a lack of guidance and support for new sisters. A Muslim man who comes to the USA, sometimes solely for the Green card, can get away with a lot more marrying a new Muslim whereas many things she may believe, or not even know to ask about would not be tolerated in an “Islamic” culture. An American woman's idea of “feminism” also allows a man to take advantage of her financially for sure. I think mixed cultural marriages are more likely to be solid if they are built on a foundation of deep knowledge and understanding of the religion and a desire to implement its precepts. Unfortunately, I am the first to admit I did not do enough knowledge seeking before taking my shahādah, and as the years progressed and I came to know details of the religion, strengthened myself as a Muslim and began insisting on my rights, my marriage also got rockier.

[HZ]:  How would you explain the feeling of being abused to a person who has never suffered it himself/herself?

[UY]:  The best explanation or metaphor that I came across over the last few years after I came to understand that what I had experienced in my marriage was, in fact, abuse was a YouTube PSA (public service announcement) that shows a woman slowly struggling and drowning in a tank of water, and just as she is about to drown the water gushes out and she gets a moment of relief, only to have the tank start filling up again. That is how the cycle of abuse works and feels. In fact, women who have been in abusive relationships for a long period of time learn how to “relieve the tension” as it were and trigger the abuse in order to get that sense of relief, and they also of course try to prolong the period of calm after the storm. In this way women try their best to modify and change their own behaviors in an effort to better survive in the only way they know how, to live with and around the abuse, and to live through each incident.

[HZ]:  As a survivor, what advice can you give other women in similar situations?

[UY]:  Every woman is a survivor, the ones in their marriages and relationships, and the single divorcees. Every day women survive. The more important signpost I can place in front of a woman is not survival; it is the ability to thrive. If a woman is merely hanging onto each day, then that is not a self-loving way to be, so I can only suggest that each woman take a long hard look at her unique situation and experiences and see if she can find a way to thrive in her own way. Ultimately each woman has to make the decision to leave and make it work or stay and make it work for her. No one can tell her what the best thing to do is, and she knows her abuser more intimately than anyone else ever will, and only she can know how safe it is to do either of those actions.

One more thing I would have to add that is of increased concern for an American convert to Islam is the issue of dual nationality and dual citizenship for children born in the USA. Parental rights are strongly in favor of the man in Islamic countries and none of the so-called Muslim countries are signatories on the Hague convention, an international convention that attempts to prevent and aid in the persecution and return of abducted children. Converts married to dual citizenship men should be especially aware and mindful of this point because while abduction out of the state can be devastating, often international child abduction can be nearly forever.

Resources
Turning Point (New York)
Muslimat Al- Nisaa Baltimore, MD
Project Sakinah
UK

Nour Domestic Violence (London)

Texas

AnNisa Hope Center (http://www.annisahopecenter.com/index.html)
Daya: Serving Families in Crisis (http://www.dayahouston.org/resources.php)
Houston Area Women's Center (http://www.hawc.org)

California

Niswa Los Angeles
Muslim women's shelter in the Bay Area, CA: http://asknisa.org/

Illinois
Apna Ghar
Hamdard Center

National Domestic Violence Hotline

Here is an updated list of Muslim organizations in the US on the Peaceful Families website.
Please add resources from your locality – we will add them to the list.