Here's a brief summary of a few of Sunday's TDC talks, from our “reporter in the field”, Ahmad Al Farsi– Sex Ed., Domestic Harmony and Meet the Shayookh (Sh. Yasir Qadhi, Sh. Yaser Birjas, imam Johari Abdul Malik) :

Sex Ed., by Sh. Yaser Birjas

A lecture that broke all taboos, to tell things as it is.

The shaykh delivered a MUCH needed lecture on the proper etiquettes of the bedroom for a Muslim couple, going way beyond the syllabus of “Fiqh of Love”, to very explicit details that I won't mention here (I don't feel a blog is the proper place to discuss this). Suffice to say that, insha'Allah, every married couple would benefit from learning the specifics covered in this lecture – specifics that many are too afraid to mention – but should not be afraid to mention, as long as the discussion takes place in the proper setting, with the appropriate conduct.

Domestic Harmony

A good talk addressing the issue of domestic violence; an unfortunate problem in many communities, including our own.

Not to nitpick, but I did have one issue with this talk – not with the topic itself, as we do need this topic to be addressed – but rather, the manner in which it was treated. A video was shown in which the term “waDribuhunna” found in verse 4:34 was mistranslated as “leave them” (according to Laleh Bakhtiar's translation) instead of “hit them (lightly)”. It is unfortunate that the presenter of this video chose to address the problem of domestic violence by resorting to a modernist translation (no scholar in the Sunni tradition has ever accepted the meaning of “leave them” for this verse); I wish they had tried to solve the problem in a more legitimate fashion.

I have full confidence in TDC, and I know that if they had caught this “mistranslation” being propogated in this video, they would not have allowed it. IMHO the organisers should be more careful to pre-screen such material, prior to its presentation at the conference. Allahu 'alam. Despite my criticism, let it be known that I love TDC for the sake of Allah.

Meet the Shaykh — Sh. Yasir Qadhi, Sh. Yaser Birjas, imam Johari Abdul Malik

masha'Allah, in this last session, we all got to get up close and personal with these three beloved Shuyukh, as they shared their personal lives with us:

  • How working in the field of da'wah affects their family lives.
  • How our beloved Shuyukh met their own beloved wives. For example, imam Johari literally just walked up to his wife-to-be (after seeking permission from her wali) and said, “I'd like to make you an offer: how about you become my wife and I become your husband?”.
  • How imam Johari loves golf, as – in his opinion – the golf course is the closest thing to Jannah on Earth (with specific reference to “Jannaatun tajree min tahtiha al-anhaar“).
  • We learned about the early days in the lives of our Shuyukh. Imam Johari and his fellow Muslims used to pay WEEKLY for a plane ticket for imam Siraj Wahhaj to come down to Howard University and give them a halaqah… now that's devotion, masha'Allah.
  • We learned why Sh. Yasir Qadhi is studying Islam at Yale (a non-Muslim institution), and how he plans to combine the analytical skills gained there with the traditional methods of teaching in the Middle-East and East.

Of course, the talk would not have been complete without a jinn story from Sh. Yasir Qadhi :) … and subhan'Allah, the story he related occurred DURING his aqeedah class, in which he taught a session on black magic. I won't tell it, except to say that the 300 or so students who witnessed it directly must have been FREAKED OUT beyond belief! [Note from the Editor – Aww! We want to hear the story too!]

22 Responses

  1. iMuslim

    I like the sound of the “Meet the Shayookh” session; i think it is very beneficial for the teachers and students to develop a closer bond, based as much on love, as respect (of course, one could argue they are not too far apart!). :)

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  2. Umm Reem

    The Jinn story is mentioned in detail on alkauther’s forums.

    Br. Ahmad, jazakAllah khair for the post. As for you suggesting to prescreen the material before the presentation, it is extremely difficult…pretty much impossible. Most of the time, the speakers don’t even finalize their topics until a couple week before the conference, then you can well imagine that the material is prepared in between.
    To prescreen the material, it needs to be sent way in advance.

    In any case, we do have the ‘quality control’ people that go to each lecture and report…I think you should bring it to Sh. Waleed’s attention.

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  3. restingtraveller

    are ALL of these lectures recorded and will be coming out inshaAllah?

    please share the jinn story! or link the to the kauther forums inshaAllah.

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  4. AnonyMouse

    Ahhhh man, I wish I could’ve been there for the “Meet The Shaikh” session!
    I like hearing about the families of other da’iyaat and, and I especially love the “how we met our spouses” bit! :D

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  5. restingtraveller

    WOW subhanAllah, that is an amazing and eye-opening story. The most amazing part to me was that shaykh Yaser knew right there what was going on and went to help the brother. SubhanAllah, may Allah bless our shuyookh.

    Its like jinn stories have become a source of entertainment while we forget possession is true and we must put our trust in Allah and say our adkhar to be protected. I pray the brother is doing well now, it’s been a couple of months since it’s been posted on the AlKauthar forums.

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  6. hadhreen

    does anybody know if there sex. ed. lecture is recorded and on sale?
    i know they do sell some of the lecture at the conference the day after the lecture itself..
    barakALlahu feekum

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  7. niamah

    oh my GOD!! Meet the Shayukh …. it better be available on CDs =) and i want to hear the Jinn story in detail (just reading it on forum gave me an imaann boost)

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  8. Amad

    Salam, historically all the lectures are recorded and sold later on. But usually it has taken a long time to get ready.

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  9. Moiez

    Subhanallah I am speechless I think my jaw slammed on the ground went down stairs got a glass of water drank it, ran 2 miles around the block and game back after 3 hours

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  10. Imam Johari Abdul-Malik

    I enjoyed my time with you all and appreciate the invitation from TDC to speak. I look forward to more similar events in the future, insha Allah. Perhaps some of you can visit us in the DC area as we have a very nice community, masha Allah

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  11. ibnabeeomar

    the thing that impressed me about the meet the shaykh thing was imam johari’s talk about when they first started getting into learning islam, the students would scrounge up all their money and fly imam siraaj in EVERY WEEKEND to learn from him.

    subhanallah it really made me embarrassed the way that they dedicated themselves to learning the deen, especially in this country. and not only their dedication and zeal to bring him down, but also imam siraj’s dedication to fly out every weekend and teach them.

    may Allah (swt) reward them for their efforts, and i think that’s definitely one reason they are pioneers of the dawah in america.

    also, my heart really went out to the speakers, and all du’aat in general reminiscing on how much they have to be away from their families to spend time teaching ppl like us and giving dawah to us :)

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  12. Umm Reem

    More comments from a sister:

    ——
    What was even cuter was the baby kangaroo, besides which there were 2 fluffy bunny rabbits, two funny ducks with afro heads, a very stern looking mother hen, an haughty llama, an experienced donkey seeking treats, a timid deer, 2 sleepy kid goats hiding behind their mother and 4 other adult goats, some with goatees, chewing methodically like old men; also a pony ride – 5 ponies in colors of brown and white. I loved watching the expressions on the children’s faces as they rode – varying from delighted toothy smiles to determined, courageous faces.

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  13. Umm Reem

    And from another sister:

    ———-

    I badgered my neighbor to go with her kids to the mela. Her kids enjoyed the mela tremendously; She came to the TDC conference too. The first day, Saturday, I directed her to the lectures by Qadhi, Fazaqa, Baysouni and Birjas – this left her with a good first impression, and insha Allah she will continue to come.

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  14. Umm Reem

    One more:

    ————

    Yesterday, the choice of speakers were less and we attended Sh Baysouni’s ‘The Family Garden’, both part I and II – I made good notes.

    Then I started off with ‘Safe Home’ by the FBI, thinking it would be about how to safeguard against sexual websites popping up on your screens unasked and unwanted but after about 10 to 15 minutes of child molestation information(which made me sick, even though we need to know)

    I went to attend Sh Birjas’ ‘Sex Education’ lecture. I found it embarrassing at times (because of the segregated but mixed audience) and could not find the courage to leave and have everyone’s eyes on me.

    When I discussed the issue with my neighbor saying that the lecture should have been restricted to married couples only, she pointed out that our children already have access to this type of information and possibly in the wrong way.

    Our children were either on ansaar duty or at the MSA’s ‘Graduation, then what?’ and so (thankfully -for me) missed the lecture. But, it is an issue best solved by our keep-mum generation by giving a copy of the CD to our children upon their marriage. H

    However I think I did better than my mother : When I started menstruation, Mum just shoved some pads at me and told me to put them on. There were no explanations, no discussions until years later when I, myself, was married and had a daughter. I informed my daughter at age 11, whilst waiting for the bus in the cold, wintery snows of Buffalo. I told her what to expect, what to do if at school, and that her body was preparing her to be a woman and to have babies and to guard herself from guys. Then, thankfully, Allah answered our prayers and we went to Saudi Arabia from a public school mixed enviroment to a girls’-only school.

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  15. Umm Reem

    Last one for right now :)

    ——–

    [We] were sitting in the Lecture theater C when Sh. Y. Qadhi walked towards us and spoke to a lady next to us. When he left, we both pounced on her – yes, his wife. I asked her about you, Reem and Abdullah (boasting, I guess – u r famous people).

    [my neighbor’s] brother is the imam in L . A. and had just recently met Sh Yasir Qadhi and also some relative of hers in Saudi Arabia is known to the Sheikh as well. It is a small world, and getting smaller with the advances in technology.

    Today, we were late getting out from home and attended only one afternoon lecture. There was Sh. Qadhi’s ‘Irreconcilable Differences’ and Mamdouh Mohamed’s ‘House Rules for the Whole Family’. We could not attend both at the same time, so [my daughter] and I argued who would attend what. She won – she already knew Sh Qadhi and not Sh Mamdouh so she opted to attend the former lecture. She says it was good and has notes.

    I will wait for the CD also : it was sold out too soon at the TDC.

    Sh Mamdouh’s lecture started out good but was not finished in time. He covered only 4 stages out of a total of 8, I believe. In stage 4, he talks about children aged 2 -7 emphasizing that children are the most intelligent at this age and can learn a lot. He then used an example of someone who was home-schooled, finished the memorization of the Quran at 7 and a half years of age; and then went abroad to learn Arabic which she taught her mother upon her return – Alhamdullilah.

    An embarrassing moment for me – Me and my daughter were browsing the bazaar. She wanted to buy gifts for her brothers and father; she had already got mine – she likes buying gifts. We encountered Sh Y. Qadhi’s wife again. I introduced my daughter and then went on to tell her about the argument we had over who gets to attend Sh Y Qadhi’s lecture when I noticed that he had come up behind his wife!!

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  16. AnonyMouse

    Ahhhhh Umm Reem – one day insha’Allah I MUST go to TDC and meet you, the other sisters, and somehow or another, Sheikh YQ/ his family! :D

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  17. Ashmin

    Subhanallah being home for only 7 days prevented me from staying at TDC for all the lectures and programs.

    I am too SAD that I missed this….Meet the Sheikh sounds like it was really cool!

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  18. Umm Reem

    Anonymouse, unfortunately I couldn’t go to TDC this year and believe me I felt more left out then I did when I missed my own brother’s wedding :(

    InshaAllah one day we will meet…maybe you should try to start convincing your parents for next year.

    BTW, Delaware is closer to Canada then Texas! :)

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  19. Hidayah

    Any idea about turn out? i was thinking TDC should invite Sheikh Hamza Yusuf..=) to pull in more crowd..

    I would love to come inshaAllah one day.. =)

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